I think today counts as a Christmas post because Demi Lovato played at a lot of the Jingle Balls across the country and a few of these pictures are from those, which thus make them Christmas pictures and this a Christmas post. Demi Lovato is just naturally festive.  I mean, sure that’s a lot of denim there but she pull sit off and even if denim isn’t associate with Christmas there is nothing anti-Christmas about it.  And I mean…. Demi Lovato is beautiful. Christmas Trees are beautiful.  There we go, another rock solid connection. And you know, it’s almost Christmas so give me a break inner voice telling me that was a reach.  My point is that Demi Lovato is very, very pretty and so I am confident that at some point someone has seen a picture of her and exclaimed, “Peace on Earth and mercy mild”.  That’s a thing that happens right?  I bet @she-goes-to-eleven has done that. Welp, Merry Friday Before Christmas everyone, today I want to fuck Demi Lovato.

Well guys, Christmas is right around the corner and there isn’t a lot going on in the world of pop culture. It makes sense, you aren’t going to throw a big bash this weekend or a gala because people are busy doing other things.  It is kind of nice because I am about to be too busy to pay a ton of attention either.  It means I can just post pretty girls in red and white clothing and not worry that I am missing some huge, important event.  So today is Candice Swanepeol because she is really, really pretty and also Christmas themed pictures.  A perfect combo.  Today I want to fuck Candice Swanepoel.

Here is Karen Gillan and I’d like to make up a reason this is about Christmas but I have nothing.  She just has been showing up in pictures because of Jumanji and so it means I am posting her.  I really like her a lot guys.  She’s very pretty, she has great comedic timing, she is a charmer all around.  There isn’t much more than that, I hope you have a good Wednesday.  Today I want to fuck Karen Gillan.

So here is Kate Upton because she was on the Love Advent Calendar today and mostly I haven’t much cared for it this year.  I have found it kind of boring and I get that they have a theme this year, I just fail to see how it’s a Christmas theme.  So like, I actually liked how Kate Upton looked playing Tennis but like… I don’t know what Tennis has to do with Christmas.  In fairness, I can’t remember all the gifts from the 12 days of Christmas.  I am ok with the first few, you know, two turtle doves and so on but once they get into what is clearly slavery I get it all confused.  I know there are maids a milking and lords a leaping but given you can’t actually give people as presents I assume these are all slaves being given as Christmas gifts and you know what, going to take a radical moral stand here and say I am anti slavery, my Christmas doesn’t need any weird milk maid slavery bullshit.  But what I am saying is there might be like 8 tennis players a playing or something, I can’t remember and don’t care.  So I am giving today a slight pass, maybe tennis is actually Christmas themed.  I am willing to look past it for gifs of Kate Upton I guess.  Today I want to fuck Kate Upton.

Jessica Nigri is showing up and is in danger of doing so again before Christmas because apparently she is all about the Christmas spirit.  Or just… smart about what she wears when.  Whatever the reason I do see a steady trickle of her new stuff on the internet and sometimes it catches my eye and basically all of Decembers seems to be dedicated to Christmas themed stuff.  Which I am 100% down for because I quite like Christmas.  And I like sexy Christmas stuff.  I don’t know why and it’s probably not a thread I should pull, why do I always like girls in red velvet and white fur trim?  Boy, some questions are just better not answered.  I do.  I embrace it.  I move on.  Anyway, here she is because… well actually white fur trim and a sparkly red top.  I guess that’s Santa Claus cosplay?  That’s kind of confusing on a few levels as well but I think she looks amazing.  So today I want to fuck Jessica Nigri.

Candice Swanepoel has announced she is pregnant with her second child and it’s a pretty naked attempt to get a reaction out of me… no, you know what, I’ll run this joke into the ground some more another time.  Nothing Candice Swanepoel does is about me.  Nor is it about you.  A top level model gets pregnant and in comes the choruses that involve one of my most hated phrases, “she’ll ruin her body”.  Boy, what year is it?  Do I, the creep who runs a blog called who I want to fuck today of all places, have to be the one to explain this?  A woman cannot ruin her body if she is doing what she wants with it. Literally cannot be ruined because it belongs to her and she is using it for what she wants to use it, thus it is not ruined by highly functional an fulfilling to her. What a woman chooses to do with her body cannot ruin it, no matter how much you would not do that to your body, that includes getting pregnant, getting a boob job, getting boob reduction, gaining weight, losing weight, getting tattoos, getting piercings, cutting her hair, I dunno, some other thing that I am sure someone has strong opinions on.  None of this counts as ruining anything.  And I know for some people it seems like an innocuous statement but it isn’t and I’ll be honest, I have read a lot of the comments and it’s not innocuous.  At best it’s catty bullshit at worst it’s far more vile.  I really like pictures of pretty women.  A lot.  They are a privilege, not a right.  It’s important to remember that.  If we are lucky enough that someone like Candice Swanepoel gets in front of a camera then we are lucky.  She doesn’t owe it to us.  She doesn’t owe us to look a certain way.  Maybe we could keep this in mind in general. Maybe in general we could just remind ourselves most things aren’t about us and use a little empathy to think it through from others sides.  I know this post sounds like a women’s issues thing but it’s more just a being decent to people thing.  I just happen to think women are people.  Today I want to fuck Candice Swanepoel.

So I have basically known this post was coming for a month.  No, probably for like a year.  Whenever they moved the date back for the Last Jedi.  But I knew at least a month ago that my post on the 16th was pretty much out of my control.  Not that I had anything put together or whatever but just… well, I knew there was very little chance I wouldn’t be posting Daisy Ridley.  Before the Force Awakens came out I was pretty hyped about the new trilogy but I didn’t find myself particularly attracted to Daisy.  That happens.  I had nothing against her, it was just whatever.  Then I saw her on screen and fell in love with the character and just the raw charisma and charm and you know, I think I said all that when I posted her the first time.  It was probably about 2 AM when I got home from seeing The Force Awakens.  Anyway, it’s just worth pointing out that Star Wars is kind of why she’s here but Daisy Ridley is a big part of why Star Wars is so important again.  It was always important to me, I love Star Wars.  I read the Thrawn trilogy when it came out and liking that shit made you a nerd. But you know what, 5 years ago I still loved my old Star Wars stuff but there was next to no excitement when Star Wars stuff was announced. None. Now there is. Always. And Daisy Ridley is a big part of that. The fact that I and people I love are excited and Star Wars has become a major event in ours lives is in a large part thanks to what Daisy Ridley brings to the screen.  I think the new trilogy has lots of credit to pass around but how good all of the new cast is plays a major part.  I am thankful I guess.  We all can use a bit of childhood magic in ours lives and this does it for me. So she’s here because of Star Wars but also because she’s just a little bit magical. She plays a hero  I adore and the world always needs more heroes.  Today I wan to fuck Daisy Ridley.

So Charli XCX’s new mix tape comes out today and I haven’t looked or anything but I feel confident is probably the biggest thing happening in pop culture today.  I mean, I don’t think anything else is happening.  Anyway, I am looking forward to listening and I happen to find Charli XCX extremely attractive.  So here she is.  Today I want to fuck Charli XCX.

I am so glad that Chastain season started early this year and has sustained itself for so long.  At this rate, Molly’s Game will take us all the way to the Golden Globes and then the cavalcade of Hollywood self congratulation should assure us an uninterrupted Chastain season through March.  This is very exciting.  Usually when I post Jessica Chastain I talk about her acting because I believe she is the best Actor working right now.  Like, I don’t have a doubt at all when I say that.  I watch a lot of movies.  Plenty of bad ones but I also watch almost all the big Oscar bait ones and pretty much all the major awards films each year and no one is better at filling out and breathing life into a character than Jessica Chastain.  Often with very little on the page she is able to make a fully formed person who you can understand and see as a three dimensional being just in the way she inhabits them.  She is remarkable.  Sorry, my point was usually I talk about her acting but I have no plans to today.  Other than that little aside because on top of that, her sense of style is just unimpeachable.  It’s amazing how good she looks on the red carpet.  She just exudes grace, which is not something everyone can pull off.  She is beautiful yes but there is something else.  I guess my point is it’s crazy just how talented she is.  She is a good enough actress that she could wear a garbage bag with holes cute out on the red carpet and I’d be like, “Well, that looks terrible but she’s such a good actress I am posting her anyway”.  And she could be a garbage actress but with the way she looks on the red carpet I’d be like, “Well, I really don’t like almost anything she’s in but man she just looks so perfect in a gown”.  Instead she’s great at both.  Which would seem greedy coming from some people but she has such effortless grace that it feels right.  She is above us all.  Today I want to fuck Jessica Chastain.

Just this weekend I was talking with my dear friend Katherine about how Anna Kendrick hasn’t shown up here in a long time.  We both agreed that was a tragedy but it’s one that is reflective of the fact that she has mostly been absent from events this year.  Past awards season she has hardly shown up anywhere or at anything.  I don’t know why.  Katherine pointed out that Pitch Perfect 3 wasn’t far away and would likely fill the very obvious Anna Kendrick sized hole in our lives.  So today when I saw there were pictures of Anna Kendrick at the Pitch Perfect 3 premier I was already inclined to post her before I even saw them.  Then I saw the pictures and oh dear god.  She looked amazing.  Just… she looked hot as fuck.  I mean I like Anna Kendrick but boy that was a look I liked on her.  So she’s here.  Really she just needed to look passable and instead she just ran up the score.  No one else could come close today because look at her.  Today I want to fuck Anna Kendrick.