If anything this blog should show how mercurial and indecisive I am as a human being.  I get that that might seem like an odd statement as I post someone I have posted more than anyone else but most people run a fuck year blog about one person or can name a favorite celebrity or whatever.  I mean, I might be able to name a favorite as well but it’ll be different tomorrow and I’ll have a real issue deciding and I’ll never feel comfortable with my answer.  And posting Kate Upton it might seem strange that I am taking about this but yesterday she was on the list of people at things at Cannes who looked good but there were like 4 people I would have put ahead of her.  Nothing new has really come out since then and she is now ahead of all of them.  Why?  It might just be that I am really easy to influence, pictures of her, pictures I had already seen mind you, popped up on my dash overnight of her in Cannes and it was like, man, she looks good, I want to post her.  I mean, I also watched a blind taste test of tacos yesterday and then an hour later was craving tacos and didn’t put together why until I was eating tacos.  So there is that.  But there is also just a thing where on a Tuesday I will see two celebrities at an event and swear one is the most beautiful woman in the world.  By the weekend I can look at the same pictures from the event and claim the second one is now the most beautiful woman in the world and looks a million times better than the first.  So while I obviously find Kate Upton attractive and have since before I started this blog, after all she is the 4th person I ever posted (my first week of posts would surprise almost no one who has followed this blog for a long time).   But you know, I also go months without posting her.  Cause my brain is stupid.  Anyway, I thought she looked lovely at the events I have seen her at and big props for the gowns she wore, which were very good, a thing I can’t always say about her red carpet choices.  So thumbs up for simple elegance, though I guess the fringe isn’t simple and it might have it’d detractors.  I liked it.  Today I want to fuck Kate Upton.

Cannes continues to give and give and give.  This time it is the famous Charity Gala with amfAR, which is always well populated because it’s a charity gala and is usually the big fashion event of Cannes.  It appears to be paying off again this year.  Who knows when we’ll finally get pictures of everyone or you know, more than three of some people, but the early returns are in and man, lots of people look really great.  I really feel lucky that Nicki Minaj was there.  I didn’t even know she was going to be at Cannes.  Anyway, she looks great, I am glad I took the million years to post today looking for decent pictures because it means I get to post Nicki.  Today I want to fuck Nicki Minaj.

Hey, so look who is here.  Jessica Chastain.  This was inevitable because she’s a juror at Cannes this year, which has quite frankly been fantastic for me. Since she is central to the festival she has been showing up at just everything and it means we are seeing more Jessica Chastain than we even see during awards season.  It is a delight.  She is working hard, which luckily is not a thing she’s afriad of unlike say… I dunno, to choose a random name Johnny Depp.  Part of me wishes we could see her ballot when this is all over because I just assume that whatever movies she likes must be great because she must have great taste.  Now, I realize you can be a good artist and still have bad taste but I am in general a fan of her selection of roles.  I mean, the movies are sometimes whatever but she is great and well, part of that might just be skill but I think she is good at identifying parts that have some meat to them.  So I hope that on top of that she is just good at… movieing?  I dunno, there won’t be a lack of lists of what was good at Cannes, I just guess I’d like her list.  Anyway, she is great and I love her so today I want to fuck Jessica Chastain.

Cannes is causing the best problem this week, which is I am seeing too many things that make me want to post that person and it’s just an embarrassment of riches.  Most notably, among the jury members are two women that are very near the top of my most attractive person I can imagine list.  Jessica Chastain, of course, I am more than willing to go on record by saying I think she is also the finest actor of her generation. So it’s shocking she hasn’t shown up yet and it’s shocking that Fan Bingbing hasn’t shown up until right now.  But that’s just how it’s been.  And while I think Jessica Chastain might be the greatest actress of her generation I think Fan Bingbing might be the most photogenic human being alive to day.  Look, there are other people at all these photocalls.  I know because they are in pictures with her.  They look good.  She looks otherworldly.  Like, she looks like she is perfectly posed and styled for a long photoshoot and they look like people standing in a spot before going in to watch a movie, which is actually what they are.  Besides having one of the best sense of style I can imagine, she is just remarkably gorgeous.  I mean, it takes a lot to outshine the natural beauty of that clear blue water but man, she makes the Ocean look pretty lame, guys.  My point is, she could have shown up every day since Thursday and today she finally is because she is ridiculously beautiful.  Today I want to fuck Fan Bingbing.

The Billboard Music Awards were last night and i am not going to choose a winner yet because I am afraid of commitment.  Also because like… almost no pictures are out.  I am not sure who did and didn’t attend but it seems like no one did based on what i have seen so far and I definitely know some people have and their pictures are not out there.  So I will hold off on winners and losers and just say that I thought Olivia Munn looked really good on the red carpet.  She often does, I tend to like most of what she wears.  She has good fashion sense and she knows how to accentuate her own good looks.  Her face basically, she is good at making her face look good.  Or good at wearing stuff that makes it pop.  Or I could be wrong.  I don’t know guys, she’s pretty and today I want to fuck Olivia Munn.

So I mentioned yesterday how nice it was to get some Aishwarya Rai when Cannes hits but even nicer is Mallika Sherawat.  Cause in some cases I get the rare pic of a celebrity, I literally only get pictures of Mallika Sherawat now when she is at Cannes.  Like, the last pictures I have from her even from my Bollywood Gossip blogs is the amfAR Gala at Cannes last year.  I mean, also telling, Mallika was at the opening ceremony and pictures showed up today most places.  But I won’t complain too much, it’s just nice for her to show up at all.  It is a good excuse to post her and well… now I am realizing maybe I am part of the problem.  I haven’t seen a movie with her in it in maybe 5 years.  So… I guess maybe there would be more demand on gossip blogs for her if her movies were more popular.  Sure one person wouldn’t make much of a difference but isn’t that how the man enforces the status quo?  By telling us we don’t matter. So… am I pushing for a grass roots movement to get more pictures of people I like?  Maybe?  I dunno.  Guys, I don’t know what I am saying most of the time, I don’t expect you guys to.  She is pretty, I am glad to see her, today I want to fuck Mallika Sherawat.

It’s become an annual tradition for me to post Aishwarya Rai at some point during Cannes.  This is because she shows up at Cannes and the Western media actually puts out pictures of her.  And well, she basically always looks good on the Cannes red carpet.  I feel like she has a bit of and advantage over a lot of people because when you are remarkably beautiful it’s easier to look great.  But in her defense, there are some remarkably beautiful people who manage to botch things on the red carpet, so it’s an advantage to her but she still is doing something right on her end.  Anyway, this year she was in this pretty blue gown that is the first pic and it’s great.  And I have seen other people comment that it is great.  They’re right.  She looks great.  Today I want to fuck Aishwarya Rai.

Now we get to Cannes cause Emily Ratajkowski has been all over it.  She is here cause she wore a dress I think is ugly as sin.  Well, dress doesn’t really do it.  It’s like a body suit with some fabric attached to almost look like a dress?  I don’t know, it’s hard to describe but it has caused my brain a lot of confusion. Because I am like, that is ugly.  I am certain that is ugly.  I am certain I find it ugly.  She looks beautiful in it.  All together it is very hot.  She looks very hot. This is a really strange bit of confusion for my brain.  I have given in and accepted that it is an ugly dress that doesn’t do a thing to diminish her beauty. Maybe it enhances it.  There is a school of poetry and art that stresses a lone flower struggling to grow in a barren wasteland is more beautiful than a field of healthy flowers.  That the stark lack of beauty adds contrast that heightens the inherent beauty of the flower.  That could be going on here.  Or I could be on 3 hours of sleep and talking absolute shit.  Life is full of mysteries and the sooner you accept you will never know for certain the happier you will be.  Or lack of certainty will slowly naw at your brain and you’ll only get 3 hours of sleep.  Once again, you can never know.  I do know this though, she has looked great walking around and stuff and I can say with 100% certainty that today I want to fuck Emily Ratajkowski.

So I was wrong about Cannes yesterday.  Not that it was starting.  It started.  People were there.  People looked good.  Not many people were there yet though and what I was wrong about was the idea that it would dominate posting this week.  See, instead Lana Del Rey showed up in Elle in the UK.  And well, her coming out with a new album is great because we get new Lana Del Rey photoshoots which are honestly always a fantastic thing.  I quite liked the Elle editorial because it was big on the glamor but toned down the sepia tone filters.  I mean, I like the sepia tone filters and all with Lana but a little variety is nice.  And she looks very good all fancied up.  So she is here today and it was an easy decision.  Today I want to fuck Lana Del Rey.

This week is about to get swamped with all sorts of pictures I think.  Cannes is almost here, well is here kinda, but people are on their way to France and there is an awards show this weekend and well, the end of the week should make my choices very difficult.  So this one is almost in under the wire, cause there isn’t a ton going on right now and I almost posted Alexandra Daddario this weekend. On account of that first dress because I like shiny things.  I am inclined to think it is a nice dress but I really can’t be trusted when it’s that shiny.  I am just not objective when it comes to that.  I almost posted it Saturday and Sunday and it just every so barely lost out.  But then I found myself thinking about her last night as well and today I still was and well, what a perfect time to get her in. Today I want to fuck Alexandra Daddario.