Guys, it’s almost Halloween, like this weekend is the big weekend for it cause for some reason it’s still not a national holiday yet. It should be. Everyone in American should get November 1st off so we can all have a wild Halloween night. It’s the most magical night of the year. Everyone gets to dress up and pretend to be someone else and we all are just cool with this. Like, if I dress as Super Mario and go to the store on Wednesday no one will bat an eye. The only comments I will get are positive. But if I do that in December? Well, suddenly people are calling the cops. That’s magic. On top of that kids get free candy and uptight middle class people get one night where they can just fucking relax and be weird. So in honor of that I am posting Jessica Nigri, who keeps the Halloween spirit in her heart all year round. Here are pictures of her as totally spookifying scary creatures. There’s a scary moth, a scary Boosette, even a girl wearing barely any clothed, which if Anger is Fear turned inwards, the internet has taught meia girl willingly taking her clothes off is among the most terrifying things in the universe. Too much bare flesh on a woman who chose to expose it? That’s about the most terrifying thing most redditors can think of. So, I know this blog is usually full of pretty girls but today I present you with these terrifying pictures full of super scarifying pictures. Enjoy. Today I want to fuck Jessica Nigri.

In the past couple months Olivia Cooke has been number 2 on quite a few days. Which annoys me. Like, she shows up so rarely and she is one of those celebrities that I just find so pretty. Which I mean is everyone on this blog but there are some people who just click with me and I know I am more into them than the other people looking at them right now. Which still isn’t the best way to describe this as it sounds like the sort of thing a stalker says but I mean like in Bates Motel Nicola Peltz was very pretty and clearly supposed to be the hot girl on the show but my brain was like, “Oh, Olivia Cooke, she’s the hot girl on the show”. Some people have that impact on me. It’s like you wierdos who like Velma more than Daphne despite that obviously being wrong. Or it’s not like that at all because I am right. Anyway, I find her very attractive and she has shown up on the red carpet a few times, which is always a rare treat, and then missed out on being posted. And it bothers me because I feel like I am just throwing away chances. Well, screw it, I am posting her today. Cause she’s pretty and that blue dress, right? Wow. Today I want to fuck Olivia Cooke.

Mary Elizabeth Winstead was at the Suspiria premier last night and honestly I had no clue she was associated with it. I mean, she may not be at all still, I was just surprised to see her there. I am fascinated by the remake because any remake feels like you are fighting an uphill battle but this one is just so fascinating. The original Suspiria is a cult classic and among the most beautiful things ever committed to film. It’s also a mess and makes no sense and there is barely even a plot to speak of. So on one hand it seems like it would be easy to construct a better story. On the other hand it seems like you’ll never top Argento’s visuals. I guess it feels like you’ll always be compared to something else which doesn’t seem fun. But hey, if you were trying to get me on board, having Mary Elizabeth Winstead show up on the red carpet goes a long way towards that. Part of me wants to make a joke about how that’s how you top Argento’s visuals but it made me uncomfortable, so I didn’t. She looked nice though. I wish she was still doing horror movies. Today I want to fuck Mary Elizabeth Winstead.

Here is Chloe Moretz cause she was at a screening of the Miseducation of Cameron Post and I thought she looked really good. That’s enough for me. I still haven’t seen it but I think I will at some point. Just you know, October is kind of reserved for a different sort of scary movie. Today I want to fuck Chloe Moretz.

So there were the InStyle awards last night and I don’t know what they are but I assume it is either fashion adjacent or just an excuse to get celebrities in a room given the magazine it’s named after. That’s not a slam, I am just saying it seems unlikely InStyle has created an award to compete with the Nobels or they have decided that the Saturn Awards can suck it and they are going to be the arbiters of what is and isn’t good in Sci-Fi. Context clues is what I am saying. I’m like Batman with my detective work. Anyway, Miranda Kerr was there and I loved her dress and she looked good. So I am posting her. Today I want to fuck Miranda Kerr.

Madelaine Petsch was at the premier of the new Sabrina show and she looked great. I love a girl in a good suit and Madelaine Petsch is already inclined to look very good. So I am posting her. It’s been a few days since the premier I guess but I didn’t see the pictures until now. Today I want to fuck Madelaine Petsch.

I am aware that I just posted Christine McConnell the other day but here’s the thing, it’s probably the last time for a while cause I am out of show and you shouldn’t have a problem with it because what kind of person really gives a fuck about what other people post? Also because she’s awesome. I know a very small portion of tumblr agrees because more people reached out to me about her post than anyone else recently. Also because you don’t have to go very far back in her tag to see article links about her being an influencer or whatever and well, there isn’t a lot there. It is interesting, there seems to be nothing she can’t do. Now, I know she got famous on the internet and we should always be aware instagram is a lie. And that is true in general but this isn’t her taking pictures to show off how great her life is. She is creating things. That’s important. Putting things into the world to add value. And I don’t think we have to worry with someone like her where sometimes when the instagram famous person is put out into the world it makes people feel bad. They look at their lives and it pales in comparison. That’s when you need to point out it’s all bullshit and that person’s life isn’t what it looks like in tiny pictures. This is different because Christine McConnell isn’t famous for her amazing vacations and pictures of tea blossoms. It’s because she makes stuff and the one thing I have heard from the few people who watched her show is how inspired they feel. Look, I could go on about how she’s probably bad at stuff. There are literally no pictures of her anywhere slam dunking a basketball. Not even one of her doing a layup. She might be terrible at those things. But that’s not the point. The point is that she can make a cake look like a house and I could never do that. But that’s the great tradition she’s following in from all the way back to Julie Childes. You aren’t supposed to make a cake that looks like a house. I mean if you can, knock yourself out. You are supposed to see that it can be done and have your creativity sparked. Be reminded you can do things. You can do creative things. Will it be a cake that looks like something else? Maybe not. But it will be something. And that’s what I find engaging. When she makes cookie bones it’s like, oh, hey, I could do that. And more importantly other ideas form in my mind. Ideas to decorate a table for Halloween or whatever. And others have shared a similar sentiment with me. That’s exciting and why I am posting her again. I am not going to go around making my own cinch waist dresses or anything but even if I don’t realize it something I cook this week will likely be influenced by it. I guess I really like the feeling of being inspired. Also, she has so many great pictures. They’re just awesome. So I have to get more of them out there. Today I want to fuck Christine McConnell.

So Blue Lips finally came out. You may not have been waiting on it but I promise you anyone who found this post by clicking on the Tove Lo tag was. It’s another short film by Tove Lo in support of her music and boy it’s fascinating. The fact that she makes these are fascinating. Tove Lo is fascinating in general. Just her whole approach to everything. I once saw art as anything we do that isn’t directly to feed our most basic needs of shelter, food, and sex. Which has always made pop music tread a weird line because I have known plenty of people who cared about having a creative outlet but they also formed a band to get laid. Not that I am accusing Tove Lo of that but it is interesting that her work is so sexual that I think some people would be quick to dismiss it. But the thing there is talking about sex is art, it’s different than trying to get sex. And of course that’s not all she talks about but it seems to be part of everything she talks about. Which is what makes it so interesting, there is a sort of openheartedness about something that could be leering. Is leering sometimes, I mean, picking up daddies on playgrounds and what not. And so this one was really good because sex is at it’s core and her naked chest will likely be a lot of people’s take away but what I find fascinating here is how it’s not one simple thing. There is stuff about sex and love and friendship and heartbreak and lust and it’s all tangled together in a way I really loved. I guess because none of those things are neat and simple and sometimes they do get jumbled up in ways that make them hard to separate and can ruin all of it. There is a loneliness to this and really to all her short films that is a little heartbreaking but also is part of what makes them beautiful. Anyway, I liked it. I like her. Today I want to fuck Tove Lo.

There is this show on Netflix called the Curious Creations of Chrstine McConnell that is about the weirdest thing imaginable in the most wonderful way. I am pretty sure it’s going to be a much talked about thing here. Maybe it already is. All week Netflix has been playing the trailer when I login and often it would play and I wasn’t paying a lot of attention. Finally, after finishing The Haunting of Hill House it played and I looked and said, “What the fuck is this?” I have seen it described as a Goth Martha Stewart but that’s not really accurate. I mean, part of it is. It’s not very Goth and even if it was it wouldn’t really tell you how unique this stuff is. Now, I am not going to claim this show is life changing. It probably isn’t. Not for most people at least. I guess someone might be inspired to make a creature of the Black Lagoon cake that changes their life but for most of us it’s just a pleasantly weird thing to watch. So the Martha Stewart thing is right but other than that it’s more like something with a Horror Host. Except tonally not quite, it feels almost like a kids show in tone except it’s not for kids. I guess it’s what if Pee Wee’s Playhouse had been a parody of Martha Stewart instead of children’s shows and Pee Wee’s biggest influence was the Nightmare Before Christmas. That sorta gets it. Anyway, it’s delightful and fascinating and at the core, past the puppets and sort of storyline is Christine McConnell. Who I hadn’t heard of but wow is she cool as fuck. A deep dive into her on the internet shows you someone who makes her own clothes, makes costumes, takes strange horror themed photographs, and makes amazing cakes. And other arts and crafts. She is just a remarkable font of strange creativity and I love it. So I am posting her because it’s just really cool and I love her pictures. Today I want to fuck Christine McConnell.

Hey guys, here is Holly Willoughby because apparently she has a line of clothes for Marks & Spencer coming out and there are pictures. I like clothes. I wear them every day. I like Holly Willoughby but admittedly interact with her far less often. I like both things though. So I am posting her. Also she looked very pretty in the pictures, that helped. It seems to be a jacket heavy line but that makes sense because as an expert on England I realize that it is kinda cold and gray all the time and it rains every day. Also castles get drafty. So smart move with the coats, everyone there needs them. Today I want to fuck Holly Willoughby.