So Anna Kendrick is doing press stuff for Trolls and you know… I probably won’t see it. It’s not really aimed at me, there’s no reason to. I almost wish it was a sequel to the classically bad Troll from my childhood because man, that would be strange, but it’s not. Anyway, I adore Anna Kendrick and really I have no need to be pushed to post her but my brain has been doing so. She keeps popping in there so I see her at a thing or in a thing and it’s enough. Today I want to fuck Anna Kendrick.
It is so nice to have Kristen Bell on a show I look forward to again. The show in question is the Good Place which is pretty good so far and fingers crossed it will get better given the creative team and the trajectory of their past shows. It’s a little hard to wrap my mind around the idea of Kristen Bell being a terrible person because in reality she is the best person. I don’t have like… evidence to back this up so much as a strong bias towards everything about her being great given the fact that one day I am going to have her babies. One day. Anyway, it’s on tonight and that’s worth celebrating and today I want to fuck Kristen Bell.
Here is Zooey Deschanel because I watched New Girl last night. TV season is really back in full swing and I actually don’t watch that much right now (and I couldn’t be happier with that) but I almost never abandon a show until it’s just gone. New Girl is still amusing but isn’t the dynamo of entertainment it was once upon a time. I though Zooey looked really pretty yesterday but I realized as I was watching I haven’t posted her in forever. That’s very likely because of the whole thing where New Girl is now just a thing I watch as opposed to a thing I get excited for. I definitely have found the more I am into the work someone is doing the more I am likely to post them. Anyway, she’s pretty and I still laugh when I watch the show so today I want to fuck Zooey Deschanel.
Blake Lively is here because I had a dream about her. It was honestly kind of odd, Leighton Meester was there but only barely. Mainly I just played catch with a Frisbee with Blake Lively while I waited for the laundry to finish. I was closing up my vacation home for the summer and I guess they had gone with me maybe? I don’t know, I had to finish the sheets and put them away before I left and I remember worrying a little about making her run too far left or right to catch the Frisbee because she was pregnant even though she didn’t look pregnant at all. Is Blake Lively still pregnant? I feel like she is but I don’t know, I haven’t seen any new pictures of her since the Spring. Well, either way, we can agree this is a compelling post because people love hearing about other people’s stupid dreams. The result either way is Blake Lively on the mind today so here are the most recent pictures I have from her. Again, from the Spring basically. Today I want to fuck Blake Lively.
Here is Danielle Harris because it’s October! Well, sorta. She is at some horror con this weekend it looks like and was posting stuff about it on Instagram and it was like, “Oh yeah, Danielle Harris, I love her”. She basically shows up here every October and not really the rest of the time. Anyway, she is one of those scream queens who has just been around forever at this point and she’s really pretty and you know, I love this time of year. October is my time to shine. It’s the one time instead of me worrying I am boring people with horror movie nonsense they come to me and ask me for suggestions and about thoughts and whatever. I am very pumped. So Here is Danielle Harris because I love her and she makes me think of Halloween and the other way around as well. Today I want to fuck Danielle Harris.
I may have gotten out of bed extra early this morning to catch an episode of Luke Cage before I had to go do adult things like work for a living. Anyway, it’s only one episode but I love it because it’s exactly what I wanted to be, something that feels new an vibrant while also giving me the classic Blaxploitation feel that I completely love. It does that, it tweaks all of it. Along with that, we have Misty Knight, who I did not know would be in this show but the second I saw Simone Missick my brain said, “Misty Knight”. That’s pretty impressive that I could tell that just by how she moved up to the bar. Now, I don’t think this Misty Knight has a robot arm and I am unclear on her ability with Kung Fu but she does seem to be kind of badass, which is good because comics Misty Knight is a giant badass. I have high hopes for that badassitude of Simone Missick’s depiction here. Anyway, the show looks great, she looked great, I am so excited. Today I want to fuck Simone Missick.
Here is Hillary Duff. This is the third time I have posted her, which is one time more than I thought I had posted Hillary Duff. She’s this odd case where pictures of her are almost omnipresent, but they are always pictures of her like out with her kid or something and it creeps me out a little. She’s also an odd case because it feels like she’s been famous almost my entire adult life but like… famous for other people. For me she’s a celebrity I have never seen in or engaged with in any way. Yet, if you look at my other posts, people were always like, “Oh, you’d love her”. And I get it, I do often go, “Oh hey, she’s pretty”. And that’s happened this week, she has actually shown up at like… events, not just her mailbox as paparazzi jump out of the bushes (though some of those are here cause I’m lazy and busy and they are just right there). I really liked her purple top for some reason. I don’t really know why. Anyway, today I want to fuck Hillary Duff.
Lea Michele is here today cause I saw pictures of her at the iHeartRadio Festival and was like, wow, she looks great. It’s that simple. I have nothing more to say other than I am very attracted to her and I find her very attractive in these pictures. Today I want to fuck Lea Michele.
So I wasn’t sure who I was posting today at first, I had a few people I thought about because they looked good in various places but no one quite clicked. Then I saw that Priyanka Chopra had been on the Tonight Show and was bobbing for apples and I really wanted to see her bobbing for apples. This apparently happened on Wednesday but who watched the Tonight Show live. Not me, I’m off doing exciting and cool stuff so exciting and cool I am not going to tell you what it is. Anyway, I really wanted to see this for some reason but maybe this is why Jimmy Fallon is successful. In a lot of way she’s like the new Leno but there isn’t the ire directed at him. Maybe it’s because he’s our generation’s Leno and in 20 years kids will be rolling their eyes telling us how painfully lame he is. I think though the reason is we know Leno was calculation and changed his entire comic persona in pursuit of ratings. Jimmy Fallon seems to be the same guy he always was, just a nice, silly dude who wants to have fun. It feels authentic. Now, I feel like our constant need for authenticity is a fools errand for a lot of reasons, in part because the line between artifice and authenticity may not even exist, it might just be the line between people who are open about their artifice and those who hide it well, but I do get the urge. We want to believe absolute truths exist even if they don’t. And so it’s why the stupid games he plays with celebrities appeals. It humanizes them, in that oh look, they’re just like people way, but also they seem to just have a moment of genuine fun, which I think is the real appeal. It might be as calculating as anything else in a public persona but that’s not important, what’s important is if we can convince ourselves it’s not. So when I see someone I like, say Priyanka Chopra, confused by this American tradition and find real joy in participating, well, I like it. It gives me a warm feeling. Also, FYI, because I have never brought it up before, she is beautiful. That’s also why she’s here. Today I want to fuck Priyanka Chopra.
Anna Kendrick is here because I am mildly obsessed with Anna Kendrick. Or rather, Anna Kendrick is here because I had a dream about Anna Kendrick last night (what kind of dream? Not important, don’t worry about it) and that happened because I am mildly obsessed with Anna Kendrick. None of this is news to long time followers. The obsession part, not the dream part, I assume no one just knows what happens when I sleep. I hope. Anyway, part of it might be that my Roku keeps telling me that I can buy her latest movie now. I haven’t but I can. I do want to see her be a terrible wedding date but I will wait until it’s a rental. Either way, she is delightful and talented and hilarious and I am not really sure how someone could not crush on her. Of course, I also don’t know how anyone could be a Nazi. So there you go, this is the internet and I have just implied if you don’t like Anna Kendrick it’s because you are a Nazi. This blog is proudly anti-Hitler and pro-Kendrick. Today I want to fuck Anna Kendrick.
Who I want to Fuck Today 