Hey guys here is Aubrey Plaza on account of attractiveness. She is very pretty and very talented and I am suddenly realizing it’s been too long since I have seen her in anything. Probably months at this point. But she was at a premier this weekend and so I wanted to share her. Here she is. Today I want to fuck Aubrey Plaza.
So in the summer a lot of times I end up posting people not because anything is going on but because I watch something. Aubrey Plaza I am posting because I didn’t watch anything yesterday. Which seems odd but about a year ago I watched Ingrid Goes West and the movie was pretty good but Aubrey Plaza’s performance was astonishing. Even thinking about it now I am touched with the deep pathos she infused in a woman who was just not right. Anyway, a friend of mine watched it last week and we talked about it and I was like, I should watch the Little Hours. Which seems out of nowhere but it was also a movie last year that was praised for performances that Aubrey Plaza was in. I have had a copy of it forever and meant to watch it last year about the time I finished Ingrid Goes West. Well, I didn’t watch it again last night. I am thinking about Aubrey Plaza though who is of course hilarious, and I’m pretty jealous of comedic persona because she can really say and do anything she wants to people and they’ll think it’s hilarious but also she really is a pretty good actress. I don’t think she’s been in anything this year. Maybe I am wrong. I always have the Little Hours when I need my fix I guess. Today I want to fuck Aubrey Plaza.
I saw Guillermo Del Toro say that Aubrey Plaza’s performance in Ingrid Goes West was the best performance of the year. It was a tweet in reply to an article that stated in a just world Aburey Plaza would win an Oscar for her performance there. I can’t comment on the best of the year because I just haven’t watched enough from 2017 yet but I am inclined to agree it was fantastic. Ingrid Goes West was a hard movie. It was a black comedy that was heavy on the discomfort and the magic in the performance here from Aubrey Plaza was that she was very uncomfortable to watch, inhumanly awkward and yet at the same time you felt for her. The sadness and loneliness and the mental illness at the core of everything she did, well, it was amazing how human the performance could feel with someone acting anything but human. It was good and she was great. But then she often is in things but Black Comedies aren’t usually Oscar bait movies so we’ll see. I liked it though and it was a reminder that I haven’t posted her in some time. So I am rectifying that. Today I want to fuck Aubrey Plaza.
So Aubrey Plaza is deep in promoting Ingrid Goes West and I hope it’s good. It’s getting good reviews, so I am hopeful. It seems like an idea ripe for exploring. For now though it’s just nice because Aubrey Plaza keeps showing up at screenings and in photoshoots and stuff. So here she is because today I want to fuck Aubrey Plaza.
So the Oscars guys. They’re tonight. Which means last night was the Independent Spirit awards and really all weekend should have been lead up events and they must have happened but there are almost no pictures. Like, Aubrey Plaza at the Independent Spirit Awards is it so far. It’s a little shocking. Luckily she looked good and hey, we always have the red carpet tonight to blow us away. I like Aubrey Plaza and so I certainly don’t mind an excuse to post her. I actually haven’t seen either of the movies she’s in this year but… well, I’ll get to them. I have seen all the Oscar nominees though and what I assume everyone comes here for is my take on the Oscars. I am not so good at guessing what will win and it strikes me as a foolish thing to be into, you aren’t even choosing what you think is best, just what you think others will think is best? Well, obviously La La Land and Emma Stone will win because it’s like tailor made to make white people feel warm and fuzzy. I mean, La La Land is fine, it’ll just be one of those wins in 5 years everyone will be a little embarrassed about but people really love it right now and I don’t want to sound to negative about it, I just think nostalgia is generally toxic for art and I also think the reason people like it is the same reason Trump got elected. I didn’t come here to bash La La Land though, if you want to hear more you can message me. No, I think that’ll win but probably if I had to choose the most impactful movie I saw of the picks it would be Manchester by the Sea. Or maybe Moonlight. Declaring which piece of art is the best also feels a little foolish to me. Certainly some art is better than others but what is best for you and speaks to you the most often has to do with where you are in life, what you bring to it. So I guess I will say that Manchester by the Sea, Moonlight, Fences, and Hell or High Water are all worth watching. They are very good, though Fences you have to be in the mood for something stagey and Hell or High Water you should like Westerns. Arrival is pretty solid and Captain Fantastic might appeal to some. Hidden Figures is worth it just because it’s an under told story but also because it’s a by the numbers feel good movie, you will get to see a bunch of attractive, charismatic people work hard to get something, some giant booable asshole get in their way for a little bit, then they will overcome the giant booable asshole and get what they want. We all feel good. Your parents should like it. I mean… you know your parents better than me but it is very feel good. But Moonlight and Manchester by the Sea are the only two movies I think will stand the test of time. They are soul crushing but very good. Anyway, I figured that’s why everyone is really here but I am here because Aubrey Plaza sure is pretty. And funny. She is funny and pretty. Today I want to fuck Aubrey Plaza.
So Aubrey Plaza is wearing Pink Wigs for the New York Post for some reason? I feel like I missed a step in this new photoshoot but I won’t complain. I happen to adore Aubrey Plaza and she doesn’t show up here nearly often enough anymore. Because Parks and Rec is gone and sorely missed. Maybe she’ll be in some great new movie soon that I am unaware of. Anyway, I thought she looked great but given I know someone who always used to get confused when I posted Aubrey Plaza and Audrey Kitching, the pink hair won’t help. I love it though. Today I want to fuck Aubrey Plaza.
So I guess girls throwing out the first pitch is a thing I have now? That seems strange. It’s just that I am posting Aubrey Plaza because she looked adorable throwing out the first pitch and it’s not the first time I have posted someone because they threw out the first pitch at a game somewhere. So I think that officially makes it a thing for me. You learn something disturbing about yourself every day. Anyway, she has a new movie coming out soon, with her best buddy Anna Kendrick and I am really looking forward to it because she is hilarious. I mean, Anna Kendrick is funny too but Aubrey Plaza is really, really funny. And I miss her since Parks and Rec went away. So here she is because of baseball and because today I want to fuck Aubrey Plaza.
I know today is usually Hayley Atwell Wednesday and it almost was but… look, Agent Carter may not be back and that makes me sad but Parks and Rec is definitely not coming back. It’s over. That needs to be commemorated and it is what I am thinking about today. How great the show was, how much I will miss it and so on. Now, it is tempting to make this bigger than it is. This was the last tie to NBC’s old Must See TV Thursdays, which for most of my life was an epic block of comedy. Seriously, when I was a kid the Cosby Show was the biggest thing on TV (you know, before that shit got dark), as was Cheers, and Seinfeld, and Friends. And I could take a trip down nostalgia lane about all of that and how it leads to this but I don’t need to. The show was simply great on it’s own and amazingly had a heart a lot of comedies don’t. I was thinking last night about how the show was almost always punching up instead of down. There weren’t really butts of jokes, just interesting characters playing off of each other. And yes, even Aubrey Plaza’s acerbic character had that heart of gold and helped people. I can’t remember if the show introduced me to her or if it was something else, I know she was in a few things around that time. She is hilarious, she is gorgeous, she is a huge talent. I look forward to what is next, I guess movies. But I will miss her and the entire Pawnee crew so today I want to fuck Aubrey Plaza.
So I got to see Life After Beth. Which you know, is why Aubrey Plaza is here. If you care about my thoughts on the movie I can sum it up as wasted potential. It wasn’t terrible or anything but it never really became anything and it kind of wasted the cast. Aubrey Plaza sure was pretty, though. It’s interesting, I like her a lot because she is talented and funny. And similar to me in some ways like apparently we were both really into SNL at one point, she became an intern, I didn’t, but to her that was like the ultimate. I was thinking though, I almost don’t praise how pretty she is enough. Because for real her face is amazing. Like if she wasn’t very funny and wasn’t very good at what she did… I’d probably still be pretty into her. But she is that funny and good at what she does. She actually kind of reminds me of Anna Kendrick, not just because they go on beach trips together but it’s the same sort of collection of good looks, talent, humor, and just seeming cool as fuck. It’s a very appealing combination and today I want to fuck Aubrey Plaza.
I am sunburned and I don’t think I am being overly dramatic when I say it’s pretty much the worst thing that has ever happened to anyone ever. It is a pretty new experience for me, like I know it has happened before and I remember thinking it was terrible then, too, but in general I am not a person who burns easily at all. So I don’t know what happened here, I even put on sunscreen because as I get older I skew more to being a “might as well be safe” sort of person and away from my younger, “I’m not a pussy, no thanks” sort of person. Apparently that 50 SPF was bullshit though because usually when I am buttoning up whatever I am wearing on the top half of my body it doesn’t cause me tremendous pain. Anyway, red is not really my color but I am stuck with it for a few days and it’s hard to sit around thinking about what celebrity is the most desirable at the moment when I am in what I can say, again without being overly dramatic, is the worst pain any human has ever felt before. Luckily, I think Aubrey Plaza would sort of get me in this situation. She just seems like a person who would be able to commiserate that the sun is indeed bullshit and we live in a cruel, cruel universe where the very star that gives us life also apparently hates us and wants to torture us. The sun is an asshole is what I am saying and I feel like she’d agree. And even if she didn’t she’d be funny and I think I’d enjoy that. My basic point is that the sun is a lousy son of a bitch but Aubrey Plaza is beautiful and hilarious and pretty great. So today I want to fuck Aubrey Plaza.
Who I want to Fuck Today 