Tag: Singer

Man guys, I feel like i was hit by a truck.  My head is pounding, my neck is sore, I am groggy and out of it.  Good news is I was not actually hit by a truck.  The bad news is I didn’t actually do anything fun to make this happen.  There was a fire alarm that kept going off last night and… man, I am on no sleep and apparently the sleep I got did me wrong. It’s like my head is some poor woman in an old country song cause the slights against it just keep mounting up today.  Anyway, I didn’t think I would be able to think of anyone to post today cause it’s hard on days like this. But then I saw pictures of Charli XCX at Lollapalooza and she looked pretty adorable.  It also turns out today is her birthday, so that’s convenient I suppose.  Anyway, I happen to like Charli, I like her music, I think she is incredibly attractive so… today I want to fuck Charli XCX.

I guess it’s old home week cause here is Katy Perry, who much like Kate Upton has shown up a lot but not a lot recently.  There are lots of reasons for this, Pop stars wax and wane and when there isn’t a new album or major tour they show up less, I think about them less.  Also, not a huge fan of the haircut she had for a bit there.  Anyway, she is here because she has had some photoshoots in the past month I have enjoyed and someone asked me the other day about the Katy Perry and Taylor Swift feud.  I haven’t talk about it because it all strikes me as colossally stupid. Apparently at least some people care about my opinion on this so here is my opinion, it is a fight between millionaires and the only thing dumber than millionaires getting bent out of shape about who their employees work for are people who are in no way involved caring about what millionaires fight about.  On a more granular level, I would say the people who matter here are the back up dancers, who clearly for some reason liked one singer’s offer better than another.  Thus they left for higher pay, better working conditions, something they thought would make their job and thus their life better.  If we were talking about Burger King and McDonalds no one would begrudge anyone for going to get a better job at the rival, no matter how big of a deal promotion Burger King was having right now.  This of course is the power of art, we feel emotionally invested and thus anyone who might even slightly hurt the art (and by extension the artist) we see as the enemy.  I have seen it in nerd culture for years.  Comic book creator leaves a mainstream title to create his own work, believing he is entitled to greater fruits of his labor?  He is a monster who has betrayed us all.  Famed game developed doesn’t make a sequel to a huge title but stats his own studio?  He’s ruined it for everyone!  So if you want to know what i think I think it is all very, very stupid and I haven’t brought it up because I know a lot of you care.  But it is stupid to care, in case you didn’t know. That said, it’s fun to get mean songs out of it.  That’s just art being art though.  Anyway, that’s a whole lot not about Katy Perry but I don’t feel like writing more.  I’ll just say today I want to fuck Katy Perry.

Here is some Ariana Grande for you all.  I am not sure why she is here other than the fact that she was just on my mind when I woke up.  I have had coffee, breakfast, a shower, and worked out and she’s still on my mind.  So I guess she’s getting posted today then.  I guess she is in the news cause of the fact that she said she hates America.  I guess this is a big deal to some people but I have a hard time caring about off the cuff statements by kids, lord knows I said some stupid shit when I was 22.  Honestly, licking the donut seems way more egregious to me, cause we all knew that guy when we were teenagers.  The guy who just would randomly ruin shit for other people for no reason?  That guy always bothered me, it seems to me it comes from a place of spoiled privileged that you are ok with just destroying shit.  I knew a guy who used to just randomly break stuff in people’s lawns and his point was he didn’t care.  And of course not, cause he didn’t have to work for that shit.  But in the end it’s just a donut.  So I think it’s stupid but I also think hidden video of celebrities is stupid, too.  In the end she is here because she’s hot.  Licking a donut doesn’t change that and I have a pretty high tolerance for youthful mistakes.  Today I want to fuck Ariana Grande.

When I start to feel like I am posting someone frequently enough to annoy people I start to get a little self-conscious.  Like I should apologize. Like I am sorry I still find Charli XCX so attractive.  I am sorry.  This is of course stupid for multiple reasons.  The first of which is people very likely don’t care.  We need to remind ourselves now and then the world doesn’t revolve around us.  Most if not all of the actions other people take have nothing to do with us.  But of course only an egomaniac would start a blog about one’s personal libido and think anyone would care.  So it could be a struggle for that kind of person. The second reason it is remarkably silly is you guys know what you signed up for.  The blog is called Who I Want to Fuck Today.  I feel like you should know you’re just going to get whoever I am into.  I happen to be remarkably charmed by Charli XCX, which is ingredient one for showing up a lot. I also find her physically attractive on a level that is pretty rare. And thus she shows up all the time.  I guess… sorry I’m not sorry.  She’s hot.  Today I want to fuck Charli XCX.

Here is Charli XCX cause… it’s been almost a week so I don’t know how I am expected to go any longer without posting her.  I know it is getting excessive but she is showing up more and more often.  I hope this is because she is getting more popular, more successful, whatever.  I just know it seems to be good for me because more pictures show up, more videos (youtube is really culpable here, it keeps suggesting Charli XCX related things to me), just more things that i enjoy that also put her front and center in my attention.  And I like her a lot.  So today I want to fuck Charli XCX.

So I just watched a video that was Charli XCX at a record store selecting records.  This is what is great about the internet because sometimes you find stuff that so specifically melds with your taste you are sure it was made just for you.  If you know me, hell if you have read some of my ramblings, you probably know I have a lot of records.  I love getting records.  I love spending time in a record store.  I also happen to love Charli XCX so it was exciting.  Then the first album she grabs is a Monkees album, which you probably don’t know about me but was one of the major formative bands in my life.  When I was about 7 I was basically obsessed with the Beatles, the Beach Boys, and the Monkees.  I would say it very much is responsible for the fact that I like things with a much greater pop sensibility than a lot of my friends did.  And apparently the Monkees were a mainstay in Charli XCX’s household.  So it makes sense that I am a fan of hers. Obviously, also, probably proof that my attraction to her was written in the stars or something.  I mean, all this time i have been trying to describe the strange attraction I have for her, it’s different than with a lto of people, it’s intense.  I couldn’t put it in words.  Apparently it was the Monkees. I could have made a joke about those words being some strange lyric from like Last Train to Clarksville but you know, all the songs I could think of, none of the words fit.  Today I want to fuck Charli XCX.

So today was a pretty easy day as far as picks go.  Last night before bed I noticed pictures starting to come through for the Billboard Music Awards and I was like, well, that’ll likely play a factor in tomorrow’s pick.  Then this morning I finally saw pictures of Charli XCX on the red carpet and any thinking was done.  Because she looked amazing.  She won the Billboard Music Awards.  Huzzah!  I am incredibly attracted to her as you know if you have talked to me about her.  Cause I can go on and on.  She is pretty awesome and.. look, she looked amazing.  So she’s here.  Today I want to fuck Charli XCX.

Today is a very important day, people.  Very important!  Today is my dear friend lunoboom ‘s birthday.  This is important because she is just wonderful.  If you don’t know this I feel very sad for you but it’s understandable because you may have never gotten to talk to her.  That is why this is such a great day for you, I am going to give you an excuse to start.  Go ahead and go to her ask box and wish her happy birthday.  Izzy is the Izziest Izzy who has ever Izzied.  On top of that she is smart (taught herself English by watching TV), is mega talented (She plays bass, drums, guitar and sings better than she is willing to admit), and is beautiful (in the sense that her face is quite pretty and she has very lustrous hair).  She also once won a staring contest with a mad gorilla (that I just made up but it doesn’t mean it’s not true).  Anyway, this is your chance to get to know her, after wishing her happy birthday my suggestion is to start talking about Lana Del Rey.  Izzy quite wisely realizes that Lana Del Rey is gorgeous.  And talented.  You can talk about her songs or just how she makes your heart go a flutter, I promise you, Izzy can discuss both.  In English or Portuguese.  Talented, I tell you.  So wish her happy birthday, make a new tumblr friend.  Discuss how hot Lana Del Rey is!  These are amazingly great activities I am offering you.  Today I want to fuck Lana Del Rey.

So I was not sure who I was going to post today, I was kind of busy and no one was moving me, you know?  It was one of those days where who I was attracted to didn’t even pop into my brain.  It could have been tough.  Thank god for Charli XCX.  Can we all agree with that sentiment?  That we are lucky Charli XCX exists?  Some pictures of her for Out Magazine showed up and just, boom, competition over, Charli XCX wins my heart for the day.  I wish I could say there are other reasons she’s here because I do love her music, she makes very good pop music.  I would be lying though if I said that’s why she’s here.  She is here because there are very few people on the planet right now I am as attracted to as Charli XCX.  Who knows what special alchemy is involved but I think we all have that thing.  Someone out there just clicks with you and you don’t even know why, you just see them and it is unbelievable how attracted you are to them.  Sometimes lots of people agree with you, sometimes no one does.  It doesn’t seem to matter, that person, something about them, you are just drawn to them.  I don’t know why but Charli XCX is and has been for some time now very much that person for me.  I know I am not alone because people on tumblr seem to agree with me but out here in the real world, my friends, non tumblr people, they often look at me like I am insane.  Which brings us to the real point of this post, get your eyes checked America, it is unsafe to drive with such bad vision.  Today I want to fuck Charli XCX.

Here is Pixie Lott because.. blonde British girls?  If you’re new around her you may not know that is secretly my thing.  Well, not secretly but like… it was a secret to me until I started this blog!  I don’t know why she is here but I guess to be fair it is rainy outside, so that probably makes me think of the UK, I am listening to the Animals, so British Music, and um… oh I am drinking tea.  Basically if the queen accidentally stumbled into my place she’d think she was in Buckingham Palace.  I mean, that’s basically Buckingham Palace, right?  Tea, rain, and the British Invasion?  Sure we’ll go with that.  Anyway, Pixie Lott is one of those people who is just so pretty it almost seems like it takes no effort.  She just smiles and you’re like, oh, what a pretty girl.  Of course, it can’t be that easy but it seems that way.  Today I want to fuck Pixie Lott.