Tag: Taylor Swift

I actually forgot I hadn’t posted today.  It isn’t so much that I forgot to post as that it has been a busy day and this morning I was like, “I’ll post this afternoon”.  Then this afternoon I kind of assumed I must have posted.  Then this eventing I couldn’t remember who I posted.  Because I hadn’t posted.  So here is Taylor Swift not because of her so much (I mean because of her but you know) but because she is ubiquitous at the moment.  The push for 1989 is so huge I would not be stunned if she knocked on my door tonight, told me personally it was out and then moved on to knock on the next door.  This isn’t a criticism so much as it is an observation.  Taylor Swift is everywhere.  Given that I am finding her pretty charming these days this is an ok thing.  It’s better than like… I dunno highly offensive and racist Ray Rice costumes being everywhere.  But American is better than that so I am sure that isn’t a thing.  Anyway, Taylor Swift is gorgeous and as inescapable as death and taxes so I give up.  She wins.  Today I want to fuck Taylor Swift.

So the Taylor Swift charm offensive continues and by continues I mean basically I started following her on Tumblr shortly after she started regularly using tumblr and I almost feel like I owe her a huge apology.  Or not almost, I guess I do.  I avoid going negative here as much as possible and I don’t think I ever said anything mean but you can definitely see an evolution from sorta joking about her dating some and explaining how I was not really that into her to now when I claim she is on a charm offensive.  I guess sometimes it’s easy to forget people are well.. people.  Especially online.  Especially celebrities.  And who knows, she’s 24 years old, it is entirely possible she was unbearable 5 years ago because holy Christ I know I was at 19 and I probably still was at 24.  Or maybe she was awesome then and is awesome now and just got a bum wrap.  Or maybe she’s a horrible human being and secretly eats babies and has just gotten really good at seeming charming.  The point is I can’t actually know because I don’t know her.  She seems pretty awesome though.  And really it serves to remind us maybe we should not judge anyone too harshly when all we have to go on are glimpses of whatever.  (Also, dating a lot of people is maybe not the greatest crime in the world).  Who knows, she seems pretty great now other than not following me I can see no flaws.  Yes, I implied that for some reason she should be following a creepy blog on tumblr and that not doing so is a flaw in her.  She might be pretty good at a lot of stuff but my ego way out strips hers.  Take that.  Anyway, I have to say there is something special about a celebrity using tumblr the way normal people use tumblr, it feels like a bit of a peak behind the curtain.  Or maybe I am wrong and just dazzled by beauty.  I feel like that would have happened earlier though.  Either way she is great and today I want to fuck Taylor Swift.

So if you don’t know Taylor Swift has a tumblr (it’s creatively named taylorswift and that sounds like I am mocking it but more that I am stunned someone wasn’t just sitting on that name years ago).  She’s had it for a while now but has kind of been knocking it out of the park lately by being funny and charming.  She engages in popular memes, she reblogs peoples posts with jokes, she engages.  I mean, with some people.  I don’t see it happening with this because this is creepy.  I am creepy.  Some people assure me I am not but man it kinda feels that way when you know a person might read what you have to say.  Which kind of brings up a more general point, the reminder that people are people.  It’s easy to forget online and Taylor Swift feels like a pretty good bellwether for that because the way the narrative about her has shifted over time is interesting.  There was a point where people couldn’t pile on enough and really it wasn’t even that long ago.  Those people were dicks.  We were dicks cause I made some jokes, too.  Cause we kind of forget people are human beings and I think it never even occurs to us they might like… have thoughts and feelings.  And for someone like me it’s even more unexcusable to make some lame joke about how many people she dated because… I am older.  It’s a little scary with the internet that we judge people for what they did at 21 and then want to hold them to it forever.  And in her case she didn’t actually commit a crime, it was just a convenient punchline.  And guys, I was a fucking idiot at 21, I am so lucky I wasn’t famous.  That’s all shifted now.  Which is good but.. I don’t know, I had a point here but I kind of lost it.  I have been a little under the weather, I’ll blame that.  The point is Taylor Swift is actually kind of awesome and it seems fucked up to recognize that and not at least feel a little bad for ever saying otherwise.  Also she is gorgeous and talented.  So today I want to fuck Taylor Swift.

So I guess I am saying Taylor Swift won the VMAs cause here it is the next morning and I am posting her.  I think it basically boils down to legs, because it isn’t even like what she wore on the red carpet is so much nice as it is legs.  I mean she didn’t wear legs.  That would be creepy and weird.  I meant basically the outfit didn’t cover her legs and made them stand out.  You know, I don’t need to explain that, you guys must be smart, you follow me, you get it, right?  I hope so.  Anyway, today I want to fuck Taylor Swift.

Here is Taylor Swift who had a pretty strong July.  Outfit wise I mean.  I have stated before I don’t tend to post a lot of people walking down the street because in general I am not a fan.  I kinda felt like I had to here though because Taylor Swift’s outfits in July were unreal.  The thing I noticed and kind of blew my mind was multiple times it was like, “Taylor Swift leaving the gym” and I was just like, really?  I look like I am going to die when I leave the gym, whose hair is that perfect and dressed that nicely leaving the gym?  It’s ridiculous.  Anyway, she looked good, here are just some of what she wore in July and today I want to fuck Taylor Swift.

Here is Taylor Swift I I alarmingly have posted a lot recently.  Well, twice.  But that feels like a lot.  Actually that makes three blonde musicians named Taylor posted in about a week.  Maybe it’s a new thing i have?  I don’t know.  I feel like i have very little to say about her.  This is probably more a reflection on me than her given that I have felt that way the past few days.  Maybe it’s my brain’s way of telling me I talk too much.  After all, pictures are worth a thousand words, you don’t need me tacking on more to that, right?  Who knows, here is Taylor Swift, enjoy because today I want to fuck Taylor Swift.

If you know me, or just have been following me for a while, you will know I have a complicated relationship with Taylor Swift.  Maybe relationship is the wrong word, I don’t want to start rumors, anyone else and that would be just a word but with her it could start rumors we have dated.  Which is kind of part of the complication.  Most people who know me would know I would say I am not particularly attracted to Taylor Swift, that I find her annoying.  This was very true once upon a time.  This is also the 10th time I have posted her so it kind of bellies the idea that I find her unattractive.  But the narrative that most of the internet latches onto of her life is what annoyed me about her for years.  I found her music especially grating, a thing I couldn’t put my finger on (I tried, too.  I have gone into detail).  Something about her private life was bothersome.  But… I don’t know anymore, maybe I turned a corner eventually because at some point I started to feel bad that everyone was piling onto her.  Like once the idea coalesced that she was a serial dater slut shaming “nice girl” I started to see cracks in all of that.  There are valid criticisms of her work and I suppose her but it strikes me as unfair to judge young women who grow up in the media spotlight.  We all made a lot of dipshit mistakes at 19.  I wore some stupid clothes trying to find some sort of identity.  There were people who slept around a lot.  There were people who didn’t sleep with anyone.  There were people who became communists for a month and Buddhists the next when I was in college. It is part of growing up.  So if Miley Cyrus seems to perpetually feel the need to show off that she gets bikini waxes that’s fine, she’s young.  Taylor Swift spent quite a few years manufacturing romances, dating people for very little time, acting like her minor relationships weer epic romances, and then scorching the Earth afterwards with bitter songs… well,it isn’t any worse than when my friend Nate started smoking a pipe so he could have a “thing”, it’s just more public.  More importantly, she hasn’t done that in a while.  Maybe she will again, maybe she is that sad bitter person who doesn’t get how poorly it reflects on someone to always trash their exes.  Or maybe she is different now.  I don’t know but this is the place I am at, where I feel bad when I still see posts criticizing Taylor Swift’s love life popping up.  They can be funny but they are snarky and lazy.  None of that is why she’s here, that’s just me rambling because I can’t sleep. She’s just here because I still am not that attracted to her most of the time.  Except sometimes I am.  I still don’t know what flips that switch but it has been flipped right now and so today I want to fuck Taylor Swift.

So, you know, the Golden Globes were last night.  I would usually declare a winner.  I was so ready to post Jessica Chastain you guys.  She looks so good presenting on the telecast.  So good.  And like… then I waited a while, then here I am bright and early grabbing picture of last night and like… look, I am not going to declare Taylor Swift the winner because her Golden Globes dress was kind of whatever.  But so far she’s been the winner of the after party.  The black dress.  I don’t know why, something in my brain happened and I kind of sighed and was like, “Welp, looks like it’s time to put together a Taylor Swift post”, and I knew the battle was lost because today I want to fuck Taylor Swift.

It would be fair to say that I have a… complicated relationship with Taylor Swift.  I don’t hate her or anything.  I don’t think I really hate anyone.  Hate is a lot of wasted energy that tears you up but not the person it’s directed to.  Besides, I don’t actually know her or anything, I really don’t get the whole venomous hate towards strangers. But I’ll admit she kind of annoys me.  She always has.  And like… honestly it’s not her fault, it’s mine.  If you find yourself disliking pop culture icons it says way more about you than it does about them.  Thing is though, for a long time she annoyed me and I didn’t get why people found her attractive, I thought she was funny looking.  There are days where I still think that.  Then there are days I don’t.  Those days are so strange cause she still annoys me but it makes her more attractive.  This is probably more insight than you need into my brain.  I think everyone has something like that.  Or maybe I just hope they do so I feel more normal.  I’d like to think everyone has someone who illicit some sort of strong feeling in them and sometimes that feeling gets confused.  I mean Moonlighting was pretty popular when I was a kid, people must have been relating to it.  I have gotten off track.  Really all I should be saying is that today I want to fuck Taylor Swift.

Look, I know I have said I don’t like Taylor Swift.  I know I have said this.  I have said this 6 times now by my count.  Which is a lot of times to bring it up on a blog about liking people.  Sorta liking people.  In a biblical sense.  Or… whatever, euphemisms aside, I usually don’t find her that attractive.  But then some nights I do.  I mean I really, really do.  And I can’t explain it.  Or maybe I can explain it but no one really wants to read about it.  Either way I’m not writing it but sometimes I get the appeal other people see.  Days like today.  Today I want to fuck Taylor Swift.