Category: Uncategorized

Here is Emily DiDonato basically because I woke up this morning and someone I follow had reblogged a bunch of pictures of her and I was like, “Yeah, she sure is pretty”.  Thus I am posting her because she is pretty and she is one of those people who just clicks for me.  I don’t even have more to say about it than that.  It’s the day after Halloween and my Birthday is right around the corner so I have a busy day, you’ll have to forgive me if I half ass it a little bit.  Today I want to fuck Emily DiDonato.

Sometimes I post some pretty super obscure people and basically it stems from the fact that I watch a lot of off beat movies and stuff.  Usually obscure horror or whatever.  It’s October so obviously I am doing that now.  I actually spent a large part of the month watching a lot of short horror films (which you know are both wonderful and the internet is full of so if for some reason you want some to watch message me, I’ll send you links)  Anyway, of the ones I saw perhaps the one I liked best was Lovely Monster which I have linked for your convenience. I mean it’s two years old but frankly that is recent when you’re seeking out things that don’t exactly get wide releases.  Anyway, it was lovely and moving and the main reason why was the main actress who really conveyed a sense of isolation and sadness that was quite powerful.  I crushed on her a little bit as a result.  Anyway, her name is Sophia Del Pizzo and she is an English Actress (I mean, of course she is, I was drawn to her).  She hasn’t done much but lord knows that hasn’t stopped someone being here before.  Maybe not the Halloween pick anyone expected but here you go, today I want to fuck Sophia Del Pizzo.

What the hell have you done tumblr?  I seriously logged out for 1 minute and I come back and everything is different.  Ridiculoud.  Anyway… here is Lea Michele because there was apparently a Gala last night, for amfAR more specifically.  Lots of people were there but I thought she looked great.  Admittedly I have kind of a weakness for shiny dresses.  I am not entirely sure why.  Feel free to come up with any sort of theories as to why I am distracted by bright shiny objects.  Anyway, Lea so rarely shows up here and really it’s my fault for not starting this blog in like 2009.  Or whenever Glee was good.  Anyway, she’s here today, I thought she looked very good so today I want to fuck Lea Michele.

This is probably the most 80’s post I have ever made.  Not just because Linnea Quigley was one of the premier scream queens of the 1980’s, or because my attraction to her is very much rooted in my childhood in the 1980’s, but because look at her.  It’s so 80’s it hurts.  If you have seen much in the way of 1980’s horror I can promise you that you have seen her die horribly at least once.  I can’t swear by it but this is probably the 3rd year in a row I have thought about posting Linnea Quigley.  It is hard to find pictures of her and honestly my personal attraction to her is pretty much rooted in one single movie.  I know for a lot of people her pushing lipstick into her nipple (and I mean into, like inside) was some seminal moment but it never did it for me.  Anyway, pictures aren’t easy to find, including I really want to include shots from Return of the Living Dead but… they are super naked.  You can find gifs in this helpful post here.  Anyway, I absolutely love Return of the Living Dead and have since I was 10 when I first saw it.  I also declared her to be ridiculously hot when I saw it then.  I am not even sure I fully understood how hot I thought she was but that visual of her ripping her top open (I mean, you clicked the link right?  There are boobs so be careful but… click the link) and dancing in the graveyard stuck in my head for years.  Feel free to guess what movie I watched last night. Anyway, the movie was released on DVD in the early 2000’s and I got it and told my friends it ruled and made a bunch of sit down and watch it.  I pointed to her when she first showed up and said, “She is ridiculously hot”.  I got some shrugs and whatever until the graveyard dance scene.  At that point one of my friends actually said, “Holy shit, you were right!"  Which is the real lesson of this post: Never doubt me, I am always right.  Today I want to fuck Linnea Quigley

I actually forgot I hadn’t posted today.  It isn’t so much that I forgot to post as that it has been a busy day and this morning I was like, “I’ll post this afternoon”.  Then this afternoon I kind of assumed I must have posted.  Then this eventing I couldn’t remember who I posted.  Because I hadn’t posted.  So here is Taylor Swift not because of her so much (I mean because of her but you know) but because she is ubiquitous at the moment.  The push for 1989 is so huge I would not be stunned if she knocked on my door tonight, told me personally it was out and then moved on to knock on the next door.  This isn’t a criticism so much as it is an observation.  Taylor Swift is everywhere.  Given that I am finding her pretty charming these days this is an ok thing.  It’s better than like… I dunno highly offensive and racist Ray Rice costumes being everywhere.  But American is better than that so I am sure that isn’t a thing.  Anyway, Taylor Swift is gorgeous and as inescapable as death and taxes so I give up.  She wins.  Today I want to fuck Taylor Swift.

So Halloween is rapidly approaching and that seems like a good a reason as any to post Mosh in a bunch of cat costumes.  Because… why not?  I mean, to be honest I don’t really need an excuse to post Mosh or to post Mosh in cat costumes or whatever.  She is gorgeous and she is hot but there is some synergy here so I’ll claim that’s why.  I have written a book about her in the past but I don’t have a ton more to say here other than Mosh is unbelievably gorgeous and today I want to fuck Miss Mosh.

So I had a dream last night that Captain America and I were in Medieval France fighting zombies because… of course we were.  She-Hulk was there too for a little bit but then my brain kind of forgot about her which I choose to think is my Brain’s meta commentary on what is happening to her fantastic comic at the moment.  Anyway, we were there fighting zombies in this French village and I saved Jennifer Lawrence who was a medieval French villager but also still Jennifer Lawrence.  Because again, of course she was.  Anyway, I saved her and she was pretty cool and nice and thus here we are.  I feel like I earned this post because I fought zomibes for it.  Or like, Zombies my brain made up.  Brain Zombies.  I fought brain zombies and it was cool.  Anyway, Jennifer Lawrence is great, yadda yadda yadda.  Dreams are the best.  Today I want to fuck Jennifer Lawrence.

So Kelly Brook has shown up here a lot.  Mainly because I have reached the conclusion that I am somehow way attracted to British girls.  I am not sure why, I can’t put my finger on anything distinctly British but it seems to happen.  It has been pointed out to me.  I am not arguing it.  I am ok with being attracted to Kelly Brook, on account of her being very attractive.  It makes me look right.  If she was ugly I’d look like some sort of chump but instead it’s just like, hey look, that person is pretty sharp, that person is attracted to attractive people.  Or something.  Look, I am very tired, I look like the comical before picture for some sort of energy drink today, let’s just end this by saying today I want to fuck Kelly Brook.

Amazon keeps handing me these promotional credits for it’s video service and then it keeps warning me they expire on Halloween and given I am who I am it pretty much feels like they are basically coming out and telling me I have to buy a horror movie from them.  So I did.  I went and got See No Evil 2 because it was inevitable I was going to see it anyway.  A sequel to a movie I didn’t like?  Well, yeah, because they added directors of a movie I was only lukewarm on but who at the very least did something interesting and of course they added Katharine Isabelle and Danielle Harris.  So I was in.  And I will say off the bat it was better than the first even if I didn’t feel much Soska Sisters in it.  Honestly it felt like a pretty rote modern slasher, just a few sequences were very well done and the acting went up a notch because Katharine Isabelle was delightful in it.  She was just great.  And I was thinking about just posting her too except man Danielle Harris is pretty.  Especially on screen.  And so I decided fuck it, I’ll be greedy.  I mean, it’s Halloween season, it’s time to get some horror themed stuff in here, right?  Today I want to fuck Katharine Isabelle and Danielle Harris.

So the Taylor Swift charm offensive continues and by continues I mean basically I started following her on Tumblr shortly after she started regularly using tumblr and I almost feel like I owe her a huge apology.  Or not almost, I guess I do.  I avoid going negative here as much as possible and I don’t think I ever said anything mean but you can definitely see an evolution from sorta joking about her dating some and explaining how I was not really that into her to now when I claim she is on a charm offensive.  I guess sometimes it’s easy to forget people are well.. people.  Especially online.  Especially celebrities.  And who knows, she’s 24 years old, it is entirely possible she was unbearable 5 years ago because holy Christ I know I was at 19 and I probably still was at 24.  Or maybe she was awesome then and is awesome now and just got a bum wrap.  Or maybe she’s a horrible human being and secretly eats babies and has just gotten really good at seeming charming.  The point is I can’t actually know because I don’t know her.  She seems pretty awesome though.  And really it serves to remind us maybe we should not judge anyone too harshly when all we have to go on are glimpses of whatever.  (Also, dating a lot of people is maybe not the greatest crime in the world).  Who knows, she seems pretty great now other than not following me I can see no flaws.  Yes, I implied that for some reason she should be following a creepy blog on tumblr and that not doing so is a flaw in her.  She might be pretty good at a lot of stuff but my ego way out strips hers.  Take that.  Anyway, I have to say there is something special about a celebrity using tumblr the way normal people use tumblr, it feels like a bit of a peak behind the curtain.  Or maybe I am wrong and just dazzled by beauty.  I feel like that would have happened earlier though.  Either way she is great and today I want to fuck Taylor Swift.