Tag: Actress

I watched The Love Witch last night and in the first two minutes of the movie the main character explains in voice over, “According to the experts, Men are very fragile.  They can get crushed down if you assert yourself in any way”.  At that point I knew I was going to be in for quite a ride.  Look, I was predisposed to love this movie based on visuals alone.  Tonally and visually it is a throw back to the lush and vibrant horror movies of the 1960’s that I will always hold dear to my heart.  The fact that all of that was so perfectly duplicated here would have been enough for me most likely.  I mean, a modern movie with all the charm and feel of Hammer Horror?  That would probably be enough to get a thumbs up from me.  It also turns out to be the most pitch perfect bit of satire I have seen in some time.  This is a feminist film.  From conception to execution it is darkly humorous by taking the classic tropes of the old 60’s Gothic terror and pasting them on to modern society to say some pretty cutting things about gender dynamics, male fantasy, female sexuality, and love.  I loved it. Completely loved it.  This is a wonderful movie in every way and every part of it was pitch perfect including lead actress Samantha Robinson.  She carries off a role that could have been so hard and I almost feel like it must be under appreciated by a lot of viewers because unless you have watched a lot of old Hammer movies you might not realize how much of a balancing act is going on here.  Not only does she have o play a complex character while making biting satirical points (which could be heavy handed or too cute if not deftly done), she also has to mimic some of the stilted, stylized acting of the early 60’s that frequented these old movies, especially for women who largely were attractive damsels.  It’s amazing how well she pulls that off while also being able to be smart and calculating and acting like she naive and innocent and… there’s a lot going on here and it’s kind of interesting the layers here that are not her switching tones but layering one on top of the other so we can always see them all even if they other characters cannot.  I have to say, it was a really impressive performance and this really needs to lead to more roles for her.  On top of that she is strikingly beautiful, and again I am a sucker for this time period and look, so I was inclined to like it anyway but look at her, she’s just so strikingly beautiful (and there is a lot to unpack here about the meta nature of me posting her based on a fantasy and appearance when at the core her magic was related to the same).  I even included a non Love Witch picture so you can see. The rest are from the movie because it’s great and also because look at her. Today I want to fuck Samantha Robinson.

It’s the weekend, which of course means I am caught up with Riverdale and this week on Riverdale we learned that Betty’s parents are the greatest monsters in human history.  Seriously, it’s the Coopers, Hitler, Pol Pot, and those people who are in line and somehow don’t even think to look at the menu board until it’s their turn to order and then seem to think that everyone is there to wait on them instead of doing the polite thing and stepping aside to let others order until they have decided.  Betty’s parents are horrible and I hope the show doesn’t soften them much not because I want poor Betty to be miserable but because I think the show did some solid subtle work on the abusive nature of the Archie-Grundy thing and it’s important to point out sometimes parents are bad parents.  And they aren’t doing it because they love you so much or because they’d do anything for you, they’re doing it because they are shitty people who should not be allowed to raise children.  You know, it would be good if media meant for younger people (and people with severe cases of arrested development like me) had that message once in a while.  Anyway, that was probably the biggest reveal of the week but the second biggest for me was Veronica wearing cat ears.  This was a thing.  It turns out that as good as Camila Mendes looks in pearls and pencil skirts it turns out she looks even better in cat ears.  And I’ll be honest, deep down I’ve  secretly holding out for the classic Josie and the Pussy Cats costumes from the reruns of my youth (also, I can’t be the only one who would love to hear a rendition of the old theme song by the current incarnation of the band, right).  I can’t be the only one who thought Melody was hot in the cartoon when I was 5.  Right?  Anyone? I mean, long tails and ears for hats? Whatever. Look, what I didn’t ever imagine was Veronica Lodge in one of the Pussycats’ outfits.  Turns out it was what I wanted all along.  So thumbs up, CW, as long as you are fulfilling wishes maybe more publicity shots of your stars so I have more to choose some (or anything for your stars of color, they are like not on the Internet at all). Anyway, Camila Mendes looked great.  She is just stupid hot.  Today I want to fuck Camila Mendes.

So not just one but two new photoshoots in magazines showed up with Jessica Chastain and obviously I knew I would be posting her today because Jessica Chastain is like that A-number-1 Boss of New York as far as I am concerned.  She is just a great actress but also, it turns out really pretty to look at.  And I thought she looked really pretty and it’s basically that simple.  I adore her, she showed up, she gets posted.  Today I want to fuck Jessica Chastain.

Here’s a post that will at least make a couple of my followers really happy cause those of you who like Kristen Stewart are super gay dedicated fans.  So there is a devotion to her from some segments of my readership.  She did a shoot for V Magazine and honestly, some of it skews just so very slightly too far onto the weird side of things for me but some of it I liked a lot and I do have a weakness for dolled up photoshoot Kirsten Stewart.  So here she is because today I want to fuck Kristen Stewart.

So the Oscars were last night and hey, some wild stuff sure happened there at the end.  Anyway, the fashion there was fine but not that exciting this year.  The Golden Globes were way better (though some of the viewing parties and after party pics are starting to come through and as often happens they are trumping the stuff worn the actual event).  As such, I really only had a couple of things that were tempting to post today and I went probably the safest route by choosing Amy Adams.  Not that I am complaining, for an actress I quite like and someone who is beautiful she pops up here so rarely.  Her silver dress is kind of classic looking but was just fantastic on her and it’s well documented I am easily impressed by shiny things.  I saw both of her big movies this year and I happened to like but not love both.  She was excellent in them though because of course she was.  She always is.  Today I want to fuck Amy Adams.

So the Oscars guys.  They’re tonight.  Which means last night was the Independent Spirit awards and really all weekend should have been lead up events and they must have happened but there are almost no pictures.  Like, Aubrey Plaza at the Independent Spirit Awards is it so far.  It’s a little shocking.  Luckily she looked good and hey, we always have the red carpet tonight to blow us away.  I like Aubrey Plaza and so I certainly don’t mind an excuse to post her.  I actually haven’t seen either of the movies she’s in this year but… well, I’ll get to them.  I have seen all the Oscar nominees though and what I assume everyone comes here for is my take on the Oscars.  I am not so good at guessing what will win and it strikes me as a foolish thing to be into, you aren’t even choosing what you think is best, just what you think others will think is best?  Well, obviously La La Land and Emma Stone will win because it’s like tailor made to make white people feel warm and fuzzy.  I mean, La La Land is fine, it’ll just be one of those wins in 5 years everyone will be a little embarrassed about but people really love it right now and I don’t want to sound to negative about it, I just think nostalgia is generally toxic for art and I also think the reason people like it is the same reason Trump got elected.  I didn’t come here to bash La La Land though, if you want to hear more you can message me.  No, I think that’ll win but probably if I had to choose the most impactful movie I saw of the picks it would be Manchester by the Sea.  Or maybe Moonlight.  Declaring which piece of art is the best also feels a little foolish to me.  Certainly some art is better than others but what is best for you and speaks to you the most often has to do with where you are in life, what you bring to it.  So I guess I will say that Manchester by the Sea, Moonlight, Fences, and Hell or High Water are all worth watching.  They are very good, though Fences you have to be in the mood for something stagey and Hell or High Water you should like Westerns.  Arrival is pretty solid and Captain Fantastic might appeal to some.  Hidden Figures is worth it just because it’s an under told story but also because it’s a by the numbers feel good movie, you will get to see a bunch of attractive, charismatic people work hard to get something, some giant booable asshole get in their way for a little bit, then they will overcome the giant booable asshole and get what they want.  We all feel good.  Your parents should like it.  I mean… you know your parents better than me but it is very feel good.  But Moonlight and Manchester by the Sea are the only two movies I think will stand the test of time.  They are soul crushing but very good.  Anyway, I figured that’s why everyone is really here but I am here because Aubrey Plaza sure is pretty.  And funny.  She is funny and pretty.  Today I want to fuck Aubrey Plaza.

For a show where I just despised the pilot it’s amazing how much I am digging Riverdale (even though I want to type Archie every time).  At first my fears were that it was a dark and twisted and so boring re-imagining of the Archie Universe that would wade through my least favorite tropes in the world, including the idea that all young people are irredeemable moral reprobates corrupted by laziness and easy access to everything and the idea that somehow bleakness and negativity is profound and deep while anything with hope is shallow and facile.  I tend to hate lazy faux-intellectualism and I really hate how much people love to shit on the youth of today, and by the youth of today I mean through out history that is a thing that has always happened.  If you’d like to hear about how unambitious and lazy the generation of Julius Ceasar was I can point you towards some Roman texts.  Anyway, the show ended up not being that which was a relief but even better it has done something very few shows ever accomplish, it has mainly filled its universe with good people.  That doesn’t mean there aren’t problems and conflicts but other than some fucked up adults, these are good, well meaning human beings.  Which is a relief because that was always part of the appeal of the Archie Universe.  These were normal teenagers and like normal teenagers they might be selfish or foolish or cruel in a moment but at their core they were good people just trying to figure out life. They are good to each other and they are friends.  It’s a nice change of pace because as entertaining as it can be you’ll notice most TV dramas are populated by sociopaths and narcissists who are so selfishly motivated in their every action the world would be a horror show if reality was at all like that.  So this is why I have warmed up the Riverdale, even the mean girls are humanized and maybe they aren’t just evil engines of destruction but people desperately trying to get by.  Veronica is still the best character on the show which makes sense cause she was always the best character in the comic but I am liking what they are doing with perpetual side character and also ran Cheryl Blossom. She seemed like a typical mean girl and in many ways is but her erratic behavior as it gets fleshed out feels more real.  Sympathy for the devil I suppose.  Madelaine Petsch is might nice to look at too.  Which is nice.  So today I want to fuck Madelaine Petsch.

This is Catherine Deneuve one of the biggest stars of French Cinema ever.   I am not sure exactly where she ranks because I am not French and as such I couldn’t tell you if she is more famous than Isabelle Huppert or Jean-Luc Goddard, I just know she’s up there.  Also, of note, she was also the face of Marianne, the embodiment of the French Republic, in the 80’s, so given the Laetitia Casta post the other day, maybe that is a thing I am into this week. Who knew?  She is famous is my point, yet I would forgive many of you for not knowing her, I kind of just recognize her cause I have seen a few movies but have to look up how to spell her name.  She is most famous for being beautiful to look at, mysterious on screen, and basically not aging for like 40 years. Seriously, look at picture of her at 50 and pictures of her at 20 and sure her hair changed but otherwise it’s strikingly similar.  So she is unchanging but I am not.  She is here because I rewatched The Umbrellas of Cherbourg, which I will forgive you for not knowing.  A friend suggested it as a good companion to La La Land and it made sense the second I heard that and I did want to rewatch. It is a strikingly beautiful but sad movie about love and how it doesn’t always conquer all but maybe that’s ok.  What I find striking is just how much of art comes from what we bring to the table.  My views on the movie now are very different than they were when I was younger.  I always liked it but it is richer now, stronger, and I find my sympathies lie in multiple directions now.  There are no villains here, though in younger days I did want to cast Catherine Deneuve’s Genevieve as such.  Perception and age can change the way you view things, love included.  It is a gorgeous movie to look at and listen to and is moving.  I highly recommend it if you think you might enjoy a French musical.  Or not.  Of course, Catherine Deneuve was quite beautiful in it and you can see why someone would be so smitten with her.  Today I want to fuck Catherine Deneuve.

Happy Valentine’s Day everyone.  I hope you have a good one.  Like regardless of your relationship status or anything like that.  I know some people can really feel the drag of this day.  Believe me I know.  The ghosts of past relationships and unkissed kisses can haunt your life and you can feel them starting to take on substance to drag you down.  The dull ache can turn into a throb.  I get it, it can be hard and if you’re in that spot you have my sincerest sympathies.  It’s tough.  But it gets better.  Time heals all wounds and all of that. I mean, the real truth is if your past relationship didn’t work there was a reason and you might be miserable now but it’s a misery that will pass and get better with time.  Being in a bad relationship?  That’s a misery that continues as long as the relationship does.  You can fight and fight but you’re just going to hang on to something that makes you unhappy.  So what I am saying is you’re in a better place now than you were before, so hang on to that.  Besides, being single has it’s perks.  Not that you came her for any of that, I am just saying guys, I know today can fuck with people and if you’re one of those people I am sorry.  If you need someone to talk to you can message me.  But it isn’t so bad. I mean, look, if you feel really bad about not being with someone I want you to close your eyes and imagine yourself in a small cafe on the south bank.  The air is crisp and clean and the only thing that keeps the moment from being entirely peaceful is the couple off to the right desperately trying to redefine their relationship as they turn their relationship into a self-perpetuating misery machine of their own making.  Now open your eyes.  See, being single is great. Also I mean, you can just buy yourself a box of damn candies and eat the entire fucking thing.  Who are you trying to impress?  That said, here is Blake Lively. She wore a dress with hearts on it and that feels like Valentines Day to me. Also she’s beautiful.  Today I want to fuck Blake Lively.

I should probably be posting something from one of the various awards going on this weekend but I am not.  In part cause I slept all morning and was awake at various parts of the night and man, I am a mess.  Just a mess.  Anyway, I caught up on Riverdale and I was pretty critical of the show after the pilot and still have my issues but am warming up to it.  I didn’t really want a dark re-imagining of the Archie universe because one of the best things about Archie is that it is a bunch of light, funny comics about a bunch of teenagers that has run for 70 plus years and has never taken a negative view of the youth of America.  They are largely good kids.  I didn’t want to see a take about the kids getting their sick and twisted kicks and it sure looked like we were in for that (the pilot pulls out the hoariest of hoary cliches by having a male student fuck his teacher.  This never leads to interesting stories and somehow it is never addressed that this makes the teacher a rapist and shouldn’t that scare us all?) But at this point I am warming up and in part because it seems like they are all decent kids.  Too many secrets that make me roll my eyes but these aren’t terrible people thus far.  Which is nice because I have always been team Veronica but you don’t really need a team.  Betty and Veronica have been rivals at points but always friends.  Which is, in my opinion, a relief and something that isn’t addressed often enough as a fantastic thing about the comics.  So why am I team Veronica?  Because Betty would probably be a better girlfriend in every way, is a wholly decent and good person but uh… Veronica is vaguely dismissive and too good for everyone and that’s kind of hot.  Basically because I am an idiot.  Anyway, Camila Mendes plays Veronica on the new show and among the issues I had with the pilot was the lines they shoved in her mouth that no human being could say convincingly.  It lead to what felt like a bad Blair Waldorf impression.  But that has goes away already and I am back to adoring Veronica.  And I am liking Camila Mendes take so far.  And is anyone still reading?  Who cares this much about Archie besides me?  No one.  Well, one guy.  I worked with one guy who was full on obsessed and used to buy those digests at the grocery store all the time and read him during break when we were in high school.  So some dude named Eric cares.  And I care.  Today I want to fuck Camila Mendes.