Tag: Actress

I am sorry.  I know I just posted Blake Lively and some people don’t like when I repeat myself frequently (I assume @thunderstormofoblivion is livid because she gets annoyed when I post Charli XCX a lot and also her silence on Blake lately makes me assume she has decided Blake Lively is gross.  You have my apologies if you are reading this Blake but the bad news is she has no interest in you ever again.  Don’t try to make out with her) and Blake proved to be less than popular last time, most likely give her growing stomach which tends to make celebrities way less popular except for the small segment of people for whom said celebrity becomes way more popular.  And you know who you are. And yes, I am looking right at you.  Metaphorically, I don’t have a camera or anything at your desk.  I can’t help it though because it’s like Gossip Girl come to life, Blake Lively looking fabulous all over New York and every blog on the internet abuzz with details about where she’s going and what she’s saying and what she thinks of sex scenes in Deadpool, and so on and so on.  It’s great because I just counted and it has meant Blake Lively in 9 different dresses since Monday.  That’s just fantastic.  For me.  For you too if you’re a person of taste and given you’re probably following this blog if you’re reading this, you must be.  So good news for all of us.  Except @thunderstormofoblivion who thinks girls are gross.  Today I want to fuck Blake Lively.

I woke up this morning with Anna Kendrick on my mind and I don’t particularly know why.  Like, there wasn’t’ a reason, she was just there.  That’s usually a good reason to post someone but also it means sometimes they disappear before I get around to posting them.  And that could have easily happened today cause I definitely stopped thinking about her and other things (in rough chronological order I think those things were: what’s that sound, people debates if A Man Needs a Maid can is a tender examination of deep loneliness or just misogynistic but can’t it be both things, damn I look dope, you know, I appreciate that picture is clearly to promote porn but frankly I don’t buy those heels on a stewardess, she’ll be on her feet all day, I would want flats, is that girl carrying an Upsetters record?  Man, that is intimidating, I wonder if I could rationalize an all burrito diet).  Luckily, when I finally got a point to stop and catch a breath there were some pictures of Anna Kendrick because she was on TV last night and is… doing stuff?  Non specific stuff that is very likely related to her movie which comes out in a couple weeks.  I really have my fingers crossed for that one because she and Aubrey Plaza are hilarious and the idea of them being hilarious together sounds amazing.  So fingers crossed that it is.  Clearly, she was meant to be here today though so today I want to fuck Anna Kendrick.

It always feels like a little present when Blake Lively is out promoting a movie. She suddenly shows up everywhere for this little spurt before disappearing again to her secret lair she shares with Ryan Reynolds.  Maybe lair is the wrong word.  Anyway, she has been doing press for her new movie.  I don’t really know anything about the movie but I assume it will be terrible.  This feels like a pretty unfair assumption on my part but the truth is I have seen the things on this list and there is a pattern.  Whatever, I didn’t need to bring that up.  I’m sorry.  She always looks so fantastic though.  I am impressed with how she is dressing while pregnant especially.  Because she is managing to dress in a way that looks great, doesn’t draw attention to the pregnancy but never looks like she’s hiding it.  I don’t think I have ever seen it pulled off quite like this before. She looks great.  Today I want to fuck Blake Lively.

Sometimes I post people and it feels like I am posting the same thing about them again and again.  This is usually a mix of not posting them that often so I only vaguely remember what I have posted before but also because certain people just bring out certain feelings.  I am confident the last time I posted Gemma Arterton it was something about her being astoundingly beautiful and me never thinking about it because I never see her in anything.  That will be basically what I say today.  For someone who has been in a whole lot I have seen very little of it.  I have even liked what I have seen but just… she’s not in stuff I ever really find myself inclined to watch.  So it means I don’t even really think about her existing most of the time.  Until a picture of her pops up and it’s like, man, she is so beautiful.  Because she is just so beautiful.  Enough so that I am like, maybe I should go watch a white dude be a Persian prince.  Anyway, here she is because she is gorgeous and today I want to fuck Gemma Arterton.

I ended up watching Lucy last night, which is a thing I intended to do a long time ago but never got around to and never could quite work up the motivation to put any effort into seeing it.  I didn’t even intend to watch it, I was flipping through selections and actually clicked on something else when I caught Scarlett Johansson’s face out of the corner of my eye, forcing me to go back and figure out what it was.  At that point I knew I was going to watch it if I had never seen it because… well, Scarlett Johansson.  I have to admit she’s a draw, we’re closing in on 15 years I’ve been watching movies because of her.  Anyway, I had meant to see it because people liked it but I was reluctant because I had a hard time getting around the whole 10 percent of your brain stupidity.  I have a really tough time suspending disbelief when they are things that are very clearly myths but purport to be science fact.  So like… the force or radioactive Spiders?  Totally down because the premise is pure fantasy.  But a thing that is based on horseshit that some people believe?  That’s hard.  Anyway, it was pretty solid but really nothing special and the entire time I had some serious issues with the bullshit myth stuff.  Not just the 10% of the brain but like… at one point they talk about how as humans develop they will use more of their brain which will lead to things like being able to control other humans.  But how does that work if we all evolve to use more?  And like… what is the evolutionary advantage of subjugating your own species?  Look, this throw away summer blockbuster really fell down in the science department and I know science, I own a copy of the Omni Future Almanac.  Still, very watchable and Scarlett Johansson straight up murdering dudes is something I am always down with.  Today I want to fuck Scarlett Johansson.

I tend to shy away from what people generously call candids and I would call creepy peeping pictures.  You know, someone just walking down the street, the Paparazzi in bushes taking pictures.  And this post didn’t start with them, Bella Thorne was at an event and there were pictures of her.  I included that but holy crap, every day there are more pictures of her out doing… whatever.  And it is oppressive and I was looking for pictures and I just gave up.  I gave in.  Some of them are at least on set, which doesn’t feel too terrible but like… I feel a little bad.  It seems like she has become the girl they are focused on at the moment.  Like here are hundreds of pictures of her out walking, have fun.  I also get it though because the camera very clearly loves her.  Like, it’s just amazing how good she looks, even out to get a drink or whatever.  It’s nuts.  Except like, obviously that’s always been her thing, she’s stupid levels of gorgeous.  So here she is, today I want to fuck Bella Thorne.

So there have been a few events recently Natalie Dormer has been at and that has been convenient for me since I have found myself thinking about her independently of said events.  I can’t remember what those events were, I think she won an award or something at one and another was a Women in Film thing but I am never really sure about Women in Film thing because there some Women in Film organization or is it just a label various things use?  As I type that I realize I sound like a confused teenage boy who isn’t sure if Women are a monolith or actually a collection of individuals (hey, it’s the second part teenagers).  But I mean, I know there is like a non profit called Women in Film, I am just not sure if every event that uses the phrase women in film is associated with the capitalized Women in Film.  Anyway, it was all convenient because Natalie Dormer is amazing and she looked really good at the nebulously capitalized women in film thing yesterday.  Natalie Dormer is so interesting because she sits at the intersection of two things that don’t always seem to intersect, in that she is outrageously sexy, like to a phenomenal degree that often that seems to be her defining trait and it is easily the most common comment related to me by people on the internet.  But she also seems cool as fuck, like Natalie Dormer would be the coolest friend you have.  She would just be so cool to hang out.  Now, as I type this I realize I have fallen into a bit of teenage boydom again by creating some strange Madonna/Whore dynamic for Natalie Dormer but while women indeed contain multitudes it is really interesting for someone to be able to project both at the same time and so effortlessly.  I can tell you first hand, it’s exhausting to be that great all the time and give off both vibes.  But she does and it seems effortless.  Which is the secret to being cool, it just seems easy.  So basically Natalie Dormer is here because she’s cool as fuck.  Today I want to fuck Natalie Dormer.

Ooof.  Hey guys.  This post is going to be simple cause I am crazy sleepy.  See, I hurt my finger and so it hurt, which, I mean, duh.  Tautology aside I am rarely someone who takes any kind of medication but I wanted some Advil or something to help with the discomfort and apparently I pay shit attention and took sleeping pills instead.  Or I just want to sabotage myself?  Who knows.  Anyway, I chose Saoirse Ronan today cause she has almost made the cut a couple of days and I like her.  Besides being a good actress her name is really, really fun to try and say and her accent is delightful.  Also she is pretty.  But seriously, say her name, it’s so much fun.  That’s it, I am done fighting all these fucking typos.  Today I want to fuck Saoirse Ronan.

It’s entirely possible that all the pictures from the Tonys haven’t come through, I dunno who was there and there have been very few so far but I will go ahead and declare Mary Elizabeth Winstead the winner because well… she’s great.  I am not too worried about anyone topping her.  I liked her dress.  Well, I loved the top half, not as in love with the bottom but it’s all helped by the fact that Mary Elizabeth Winstead is inside it.  I adore her and it continues to baffle me that there is even one person who doesn’t.  But there is at least one person.  I have talked to them!  Crazy.  Anyway, I think she is amazing so here she is. Today I want to fuck Mary Elizabeth Winstead.

The Americans is the best show I watch that no one else I know watches.  Actually, it might just be the best show I watch currently.  It’s one of those strange beasts that is quite good and I feel like it gets some critical love but it seems to have no real talk around it.  Most high end cable dramas tend to invite all sorts of talk and buzz but this show never seems to have done that.  Last night was the end of another good season and as always it has me excited for the next one.  A year from now.  Keri Russell is very good in it but blows my mind when I think about what she plays here and what my idea of Keri Russell was before this show.  Anything else I saw her in previously she was a beam of sunshine.  She was always the cheery one, the sunny one.  It just seemed like her type.  It speaks to her performance that I can’t really get me brain to wrap around that Keri Russell and this Keri Russell being the same person.  She is fantastic but stoic and overly rational, not prone to emotion, certainly not chipper or sunny.  She is fantastic.  Really the entire cast is.  I just wish there were more Keri Russell pics out there cause I am so close to tapped out.  Anyway, I think you have a year to catch up on the show guys so get to it.  Today I want to fuck Keri Russell.