Anytime I post anyone it’s about a lot of things. Everything in life has text and subtext and I hope you understand that. What is being said is not the same as what you are being told in life. It’s important to keep this in mind, not so you are a distrustful cynic but so you are away that there are layers. When a girl tells you she isn’t ready for a relationship she means wtih you. Sure it hurts but it’s time to move on or it’s just going to hurt more. Or when a politician tells a story about a constituent you know they made this person up and they are just trying to promote their position through pathos instead of logos. Or when a celebrity is eating Nachos at a music festival in an air conditioned tent they’re actually selling you wet wipes. There is nothing wrong with selling someone wet wipes. People needs wet wipes and if you were a person who needed wet wipes and did not know they existed you’d be quite happy to find out. Someone pointed out to me that this is some of the most blatant product placement they have ever seen, these pictures I linked of Alexandra Daddario using wet wipes at the Governors Ball. I tend to agree, in part because it is so separated from reality. My first reaction was why are there three boxes open. That’s just wasteful. They’re wet wipes. They’re going to dry out at which point they are beyond useless. A dry wet wipe is a crunchy piece of garbage that is worthless. You’re just throwing wet wipes around willy nilly. Second was, who holds a wet wipe while eating nachos? No one, that’s stupid. Not only will it dry out, what if you want to use that hand? Sometimes you need both hands to eat. They’re nachos, something could slip off, you need a hand to catch it. Everyone knows you eat and then grab the wet wipe to clean your fingers after, not hold a wet wipe the entire time like some sort of lunatic. Third, don’t use wet wipes to clean sweat off your neck. First they’re wet, that’s not effective. Second, the alcohol is going to dry out you skin. But this is the separate reality celebrities live in, throwing wet wipes around willy nilly and sitting in air conditioned tents at music festivals. I have been to a lot of music festivals over the years, including things like Woodstock (the worst one). There were no wet wipes, a lot of mud or dust or both somehow. So I guess for a blog that focuses on celebrities it feels important to realize a lot of the glamour they sell us is a lie. Sure, we all dream about boxes and boxes of wet wipes open but that’s not reality. You are almost always being sold something and if you can confirm you aren’t being sold something it’s most likely you’re the product then. Also, Alexandra Daddario is really pretty. That seems important to squeeze in here. Did I forget that earlier? I went off on this whole wet wipe thing. Look, my main point is Alexandra Daddario is gorgeous. That was the point I was really getting to. Today I want to fuck Alexandra Daddario.

Here is Alexandra Daddario cause she was on a thing. What thing? Not entirely sure. Looks like a local morning show in New York. I did not see the thing, just the pictures of her at the thing. I’d imagine she’s promoting a thing. Not the thing she was on, she went on the thing to promote a different thing is what I am assume. I don’t know what the different thing is but she works a lot so I am sure there is something. She actually has come up a lot this week but it is not thing or different thing related because it is like… I heard someone promoting a show from last fall and she was in it. So that’s a whole third thing that must be unrelated because what I was listening to was from October. And then I know she popped into my head for no reason earlier this week, which I assume has nothing to do with any sort of promotion unless Alexandra Daddario has the ability to implant thoughts into my head. I don’t think she does and if I am being honest she of course could have implanted the thought in my head that I don’t think she has the power to do that but if she can do all that there is frankly nothing I can do about it so it’s just not worth worrying about. It’s like my grandma always said, fix the things you can and accept the things you can’t because of celebrity mind control experiences. Anyway, she is good looking and I am 90% sure that is my own thought. In large part because while I guess if she has these powers she could make me find her attractive who the fuck am I? Aren’t there bigger fish to fry? It seems unlikely. And again, what am I going to do about it? Today I want to fuck Alexandra Daddario.

This week is about to get swamped with all sorts of pictures I think.  Cannes is almost here, well is here kinda, but people are on their way to France and there is an awards show this weekend and well, the end of the week should make my choices very difficult.  So this one is almost in under the wire, cause there isn’t a ton going on right now and I almost posted Alexandra Daddario this weekend. On account of that first dress because I like shiny things.  I am inclined to think it is a nice dress but I really can’t be trusted when it’s that shiny.  I am just not objective when it comes to that.  I almost posted it Saturday and Sunday and it just every so barely lost out.  But then I found myself thinking about her last night as well and today I still was and well, what a perfect time to get her in. Today I want to fuck Alexandra Daddario.

I am not sure when Baywatch comes out but it looks like we’re starting to get the full court press for it, what with them sponsoring Marathons and so on.  For someone who had no interest in the show as a kid and scoffed at my friends who ddi watch just to slow motion boobs bouncing, I am surprisingly interested in the movie.  Like, not interested enough to actually know when it comes out but interested enough that I will definitely watch it when it hits HBO or Netflix. This is in large part because of the Rock, who is a giant muscle bound ball of charm and goodness in the world.  Like if he ran for President I would… well, I’d claim that he was painfully unqualified and we really shouldn’t vote for celebrities but if he won I’d at least have confidence that he is a good person. That would be a fun change.  But there are other reasons.  Alexandra Daddario is one.  She is just very attractive and I have been a fan since her days of making terrible horror movies (nut not days of making terrible YA adaptations because I am like 30 years too old to have seen those).  Anyway, she was at stuff this weekend because Baywatch and so here she is.  Because today I want to fuck Alexandra Daddario.

I was never into Baywatch.  As a matter of fact I would say it’s probably safe to say I have never seen an episode of Baywatch, which means maybe I shouldn’t judge it but you know… I did.  I will.  The boom in syndicated TV in the 90’s lead to a lot of shows that I think a lot of people loved but I never could bring myself to care about any of them.  My little brother loved Renegade but he was also 5. Anyway, Baywatch was a honest to god cultural phenomena when I was entering High School, I had a friend with a Pamela Anderson poster on his wall and… I never got the appeal honestly.  I guess those girls were never my type, I was much happier obsessing over Angela Chase.  The closest I came to caring was one month Cinemax had a girls of Baywatch thing where late at night they showed earlier movies from girls from the show and being Cinemax they got naked.  So I watched that.  Purely for research purposes and also because I was like 14 and always felt like I was getting away with something when I snuck into the basement after my parents were asleep to see boobs.  Anyway, all this brings me about to Alexandra Daddario who is in the middle of filming Baywatch and for about 2 weeks has been providing the world with wonderful pictures from the set.  I still feel no urge to see Baywatch but then if you do the math it seems like a movie I have to see.  I mean,I love the Rock.  I love Alexandra Daddario.  I love Priyanka Chopra.  All these people in a movie together?  That sounds like something I totally would intend to see and never get around to!  Like.. uh, San Andreas which I still haven’t seen.  Anyway, she has looked quite good.  She does that.  All these pictures plus a bunch the other day becuase it was her birthday?  I am surprised I hadn’t posted her yet. So here are a bunch of crummy set pictures because today I want to fuck Alexandra Daddario.

Netflix can be pretty good about guessing what I might want to see and it send me an email a few days ago telling me it had added Burying the Ex and it bet I wanted to see it.  And it was right, it is a movie I have intended to watch since it was first announced.  It was always going to be viewed by me at some point.  So I sat down and watched it and man it was a huge disappointment.  Oh, Joe Dante, what happened to you man?  Among the most egregious of it’s sins is the way it set up the two competing love interests in the movies.  Ashley Greene was basically the movie harpy girlfriend who you have never met in real life because if anyone was that monsterous her mother would have smothered her in her crib.  Except you know, she was horny all the time so… I guess… progress?  She isn’t a frigid shrew?  On the other end is Alexandra Daddario who basically plays a horror nerd’s dream girl.  Or maybe just like mine.  Maybe when I was 13.  It felt a little too pandering to me as an adult.  Oh, she’s so cool and she likes horror movies and she owns her own ice cream shop with flavors she mixes herself with punny horror names and… ok, I have to admit, I think I would be down to date someone who owned and ice cream parlor.  Also, I do like anyone who likes the old General Mills Monster cereals.  But my point is she, like the evil ex of the title, seemed to lack any character at all.  Which is disappointing.  Which is the sort of thing that means someone wouldn’t get mentioned in a post, much less get posted.  I very rarely post, “I saw a bad movie and the character was hollow.  So here she is”.  The thing is though, Alexandra Daddario is really, really hot.  Like way too hot for just a bad movie to drag her down.  She definitely is hot enough to transcend a movie I didn’t particularly like.  Today I want to fuck Alexandra Daddario.

So I was noticing today while looking at pictures of Alexandra Daddario at a screening of Burying the Ex (which I will end up seeing cause Alexandra Daddario and also the undead) that I am often not wowed by her fashion choices.  I don’t hate them usually.  But it isn’t like I am going around declaring she won the day or something.  What is key about this is that I don’t care.  I realized that while a great dress will often get someone on here and a bad one can keep a girl away, with Alexandra Daddario I just don’t care.  Not even a little bit because she is just that beautiful. What she wears is just a non factor, as long as I catch a glance of those eyes I am doomed.  They are just piercing. She is gorgeous.  And it is why she is here today.  Today I want to fuck Alexandra Daddario.

Recently someone messaged me and said, “So Kate Upton and Alexandra Daddario in a movie together.  Was that your doing?”  And while I wish I had that kind of power I don’t.  But i can see why someone would suspect me with those two together. For the record I kind of assume it will be terrible but i will see it.  I say this with really nothing to back it up other than the fact that I saw the Other Woman. I do find Alexandra Daddario very attractive though.  Very attractive.  And so here she is looking pretty, at least slightly influenced by some new pictures of her that came out recently.  I hope San Andreas does really well because the world would only be better off if she became a huge star and I started seeing her everywhere.  Today I want to fuck Alexandra Daddario.

So the universe has been telling me to post Alexandra Daddario and I won’t lie, it really doesn’t take much of a nudge for me to do so.  I was watching the first episode of The Last Man on Earth and it was ok but there is a point where Alexandra Daddario shows up and I was pretty pumped because I didn’t know she was in it. It turns out that is because she isn’t really, she was just the fantasy hot girl for a quick dream sequence.  “The Hot Girl” seems to be a roll she’s getting a lot and I understand that but I always feel a little sad when someone isn’t given more to work with than that. Anyway, this is right after I rewatched Texas Chainsaw whatever the one she was in was called.  I had a friend argue it is actually really good if you go in with the right eyes.  I thought maybe I was wrong about it so I should try to watch it.  And you know, if you’ve seen it you’ll understand when I say Alexandra Daddario running around in a striped shirt is the sort of thing you can be easily talked into some times.  Unfortunately I was right about the movie.  Fortunately my memory was correct that Alexandra Daddario is officially smoking hot (though good news, she does do a pretty good job in the movie I think).  Anyway, that is why she is here and good lord she is hot. Today I want to fuck Alexandra Daddario.