So Charli XCX’s new mix tape comes out today and I haven’t looked or anything but I feel confident is probably the biggest thing happening in pop culture today. I mean, I don’t think anything else is happening. Anyway, I am looking forward to listening and I happen to find Charli XCX extremely attractive. So here she is. Today I want to fuck Charli XCX.
Just this weekend I was talking with my dear friend Katherine about how Anna Kendrick hasn’t shown up here in a long time. We both agreed that was a tragedy but it’s one that is reflective of the fact that she has mostly been absent from events this year. Past awards season she has hardly shown up anywhere or at anything. I don’t know why. Katherine pointed out that Pitch Perfect 3 wasn’t far away and would likely fill the very obvious Anna Kendrick sized hole in our lives. So today when I saw there were pictures of Anna Kendrick at the Pitch Perfect 3 premier I was already inclined to post her before I even saw them. Then I saw the pictures and oh dear god. She looked amazing. Just… she looked hot as fuck. I mean I like Anna Kendrick but boy that was a look I liked on her. So she’s here. Really she just needed to look passable and instead she just ran up the score. No one else could come close today because look at her. Today I want to fuck Anna Kendrick.
So the British Independent Film Awards happened and not too many people were at them but it’s ok because the best people were at them as far as I can tell. And the best of the best was Hayley Atwell, who I will forever adore because she is one of the most charming people on the entire planet. It’s just who she is. And she wore this pretty sparkly pink dress and she looked like a princess. It was just lovely and wintery and I am always glad to see her so she’s here. Today I want to fuck Hayley Atwell.
The Star Wars premier was last night so there wasn’t much doubt I’d be posting something Star Wars related because… well, I’m me. Anyway, here is Daisy Ridley who wore a dress covered in stars and you know, that’s pretty on the nose but I didn’t hate it. It should have fought someone else’s dress if she wanted to go all in on the joke though. Anyway, it’s a bit odd as a dress but I kind of like it. I guess fringe is fun and it just looks good on her in general. I liked it. I am pretty excited for the movie. Big plans for the end of the week. Today I want to fuck Daisy Ridley.
Kelly Brook is here because wow that red dress. She was at a charity Gala last night called Teens Unite and I don’t know what it was about really but I assume it is done and over because if that dress can’t bring things together then you might as well give up. So I assume the Teens are United. And now I have Atari Teenage Riot’s Kids are United going through my head. I’m pretty weird. My point though is not that i have 22 year old song going through my head, it’s that that dress is amazing. Amazing enough I guess that it is fulfilling 22 year old prophesies. And by prophesies I mean songs. Same thing. I am rambling. The dress is just amazing. What a look. I love it. Today I want to fuck Kelly Brook.
So when I was a kid there was a gold rush in the music industry after Nirvana surprisingly became the biggest band in the world. The result was them trying to sing every underground band in the country to a deal in the hopes of creating the next Nirvana. Besides the overall missing the point of what made Nirvana popular, it betrayed some gross aspects of the music industry. I grew up in DC where music legends Fugazi hail from. They were on (and still are) on Discord records. This is because they founded the label. Fugazi being legendary and descending from legendary Hardcore acts were targeted by major labels. Fugazi always said now. So what was the next step? The labels would call Discord records in an attempt to buy out either the label or Fugazi’s contract. You know, to give the band that just said they don’t want to work with you no choice. To legally force them to work for you. In this case hilariously they would get the same person they just talked to who would laugh in their face. But it betrays a basic aspect of the music industry that is important to remember. Not only do they not care about music, they don’t care about the artists and don’t even see them as people. They see them as commodities to be bought and sold. I point this out because Charli XCX has announced another mix tape. It seems kind of exciting but why are we getting another mix tape when she has had an album done for over a year? Because music labels are the devil and need to die. She like others has found a loophole to get some music out there, even if it isn’t the music she wants out there but legally she’s stuck otherwise. Somehow in this industry she isn’t free to go to another label that would put out her music. When they sign you to the classic 7 record deal a label has the right to just never put out your albums. And you are not allowed to make music then. Just kind of the end of it. Thank god for the internet because 20 years ago you were just forced to fade into obscurity. So what is my basic point here? I dunno, I am kind of tired and I adore Charli XCX and if the entire music industry burned to the ground I wouldn’t shed a single tear. It’s a bunch of people exploiting art and making it worse for all of us. They damage the artists we love, they hurt our ability to get the music we love. Somehow small labels manage to survive and make money without being dicks, which tells me being a dick isn’t a necessary business practice, it’s just a side effect of being run by a collection of dicks. So I am posting to bitch but also because I do love Charli XCX. Also she was at the GQ Men of the year awards. So new song, new Mix Tape announced, and at an event. This is the kind of timely and releveant post I make. Today I want to fuck Charli XCX.
So, even though I play it pretty close to the vest, Google has figured out I like Star Wars. Somehow. It’s mostly a secret no one knows about me at all. But sneaky google knows and any time I go to youtube my suggestions are full of videos about Star Wars and this past week it is pretty much all interviews with the cast of the new movie sprinkled with whatever garbage Snoke theory video some idiot came up with. No, it isn’t going to be some obscure reference to a book only 10 people have read. That’s not how story telling works. You can’t expect mass audiences to go do homework. Btw, my Snoke theory is that it really doesn’t matter. We didn’t know anything about the Emperor besides the fact that he was the Emperor. That was good enough. Not everything is a mystery to be solved. Anyway, all that aside, the cast is very charming and I quite like Daisy Ridley. So here she is from recent appearances promoting the movie. It’s pretty simple. Today I want to fuck Daisy Ridley.
So my buddy @femalecelebrityoftheday said yesterday that pictures have been really light and he’s almost out of people to post. I get what he is saying. Since around Thanksgiving basically nothing has happened in the world of celebrity gossip and pictures and so on. I get what he means because I have felt the same way, though it seems hard to imagine actually running out. For example, I am posting Rihanna today because she has shown up in Vogue Paris. But even if she hadn’t I don’t think the world is going to run out of Rihanna pics. Not soon I hope. I guess even those are a finite resource but I feel generally like if I need to I can find them. But I do know what he means, it’s almost an inspiration thing. Rihanna is one of the most beautiful people on the entire planet but if she hadn’t been in a French Magazine it never would have occurred to me to post her. I blame TV and video games for ruining my attention span. Anyway, the shoot is awesome, it has this sort of retro feel to it that for some reason made me think of Audrey Hepburn in Funny Face. If you are going to evoke a feeling of an old star you certainly could do worse. So when I saw them I knew I was going to post Rihanna because again, remarkably beautiful, good photoshoot. It’s easy. I did do my due diligence though, I looked and nope, no one else beat her today. I uh.. weird, I lost my train of thought. I can’t remember, I guess my attention wandered. I should say something about our attention spans sometime. Oh well. Today I want to fuck Rihanna.
I hope everyone had a good weekend. Mine was pleasantly relaxing. Not feeling at my best it turns out allowed me to do absolutely nothing the past two days completely guilt free. Like, it felt like sitting around playing with dolls on my computer was the responsible, adult thing to do because I was resting. Which is the best gift of all, slacking and feeling like a hero for doing so. Anyway, here is Nicki Minaj who I can’t imagine was slacking this weekend. She strikes me as a very hard worker because she’s always doing something. I don’t have a specific reason for posting her I guess besides finding her attractive. Not a lot of celebrity news this weekend but she came up in a discussion this morning and that’s good enough for me. She is very attractive. And hey, last time I posted her the post got a lot of love instead of the usual hate. Let’s keep that trend going! Today I want to fuck Nicki Minaj.
It’s a slow weekend for celebrity sightings, no doubt due to the Holiday and so on. I mean, the rest of the world isn’t celebrating Thanksgiving so I dunno why you guys are just sitting around but the result is very little seemed to happen yesterday. That’s fine. I am still trying to stay mellow and relaxed and recover so I am sitting here watching YouTube videos. And I just watched Daisy Ridley build a Millennium Falcon while being interviewed. Two things about it struck me, the first being that I wish Legos weren’t so damned expensive because I would probably play with them still as an adult otherwise. $20 to spend a rainy afternoon building a spaceship? That sounds pretty fun. $150? Go fuck yourself you Danish Bandits. Unless Lego is a Dutch company. I can’t remember now. Well, whatever you are, you can go straight to hell. Second was how pleasant Daisy Ridley is and how lucky I feel that the new cast of Star Wars is a delight. She and John Boyega feel like a gift to those of us who grew up loving Star Wars, even in the dark days when loving Star Wars made you weird because there hadn’t been anything new and Star Wars in 10 years. They just feel right as people and we are lucky to have them. So I enjoyed it so I am posting her cause guys, it’s less than 3 weeks to the new movie. I am excited. Today I want to fuck Daisy Ridley.
Who I want to Fuck Today 