Tag: Model

When I posted Dani Thorne the first time in my research (and by research I mean largely clicking on her tag her on tumblr) I discovered that she had a tumblr of her own.  You can find it right here.  That has made her even more interesting.  Not just having a tumblr, that’s pretty easy to do it, I mean I did it, but following her has been interesting because sometimes we are lucky and she posts some cool stuff from behind the scenes or whatever.  Frankly, I love seeing how people work and what they do, so things like that are awesome and I also have discovered that she has the best taste.  Which is a pretty high compliment coming from me.  Not because I am the arbiter of taste but because for me it’s a big deal, saying someone has good taste means I really have a lot of respect for them.  I love her style.  And yeah, also she is beautiful.  I went into that last time though, something about the Thorne family genetics and I don’t want to start sounding like some sort of Eugenicist so I’ll drop that (but seriously, there is something going on in the Thorne gene pool because it is frankly a collection of people who are all so good looking it’s unfair.  You guys know those families..)  So anyway, she is back here again because… she is pretty cool and uh… coolly pretty?  Sorry, I ran out of steam, I like her and today I want  to fuck Dani Thorne.

Here are some pictures of Kate Upton.  I included some gifs where she is being adorable because I feel like it’s an unappreciated trait of hers.  Or maybe unrecognized?  We put people in boxes and I notice adorable is most often parceled out to tiny girls who look young.  It’s like Kate Upton’s boobs prevent her from being adorable in a lot of eyes.  I mean, not just her, I see people reblog goofy old pictures of Marilyn Monroe behind the scenes and she’s being pretty adorable in them but I rarely see them described as such, bombshells don’t inspire thoughts of adorableness I guess.  As a matter of fact I would say the gif of her in the bikini might get some debate from people about the adorableness of it because it’s.. well, it’s jiggly.  But look at her face.  It seems adorable to me.  Someone can be adorable and jiggly, right?  Yes, absolutely they can.  It’s my blog (and I am saying this with confidence, good advice there) so I am saying Kate Upton is adorable.  Feel free to disagree with me.  If you like being wrong.  The simple truth is Kate Upton is adorable and sexy and today I want to fuck Kate Upton.

One of the hardest things for me to describe is why I connect with a certain model and not another.  It is easy to explain what it is that makes and actress or a musician special because their art forms are a large part of our lives.  Models though, it’s hard for me to put my finger on what it is exactly, much less articulate it.  Emily Didonato is hardly a huge name or anything, I would be most of you don’t really know her, though certainly she has a fan base.  I just… found that there was something about her that appealed from day one.  Part of that must be her eyes because they are pretty striking but that would be too simplistic.  it isn’t like there are a lot of models out there without striking features.  But there is just something in her that strikes a chord and that’s about all I can really say to sum it up.  I find her attractive.  Today I want to fuck Emily Didonato.

So this happens sometimes, I can’t explain it really.  Candice Swanepoel really didn’t show up here in any real way for much of 2014, now she’s here twice in the same week.  There really is no reason why she of all people would be inconsistent because she is one of the people there are most consistently new pictures of on the entire planet. At the very least there are going to be a slew of new Victoria’s Secret catalog images every week or so.  Hell, as I have documented before she is clearly stalking me as well because no matter what I do pictures of her in her underwear keep showing up in my email AND my actual physical mailbox (did you know Candice personally wants me to show up to a panty sale?  Well I did because I get a post card telling me so once a month with her picture on it).  So in my case, I pretty clearly get a lot of exposure to her.  Maybe that’s the issue, maybe it’s too much and it’s like, oh hey, there’s that gorgeous woman.  Shrug.  And then I move on with my day.  So when she clicks she’ll click a bunch of times in a row because well, I am going to see her a ton. Or maybe I am just filling space rambling with my little joke about how Candice Swanepoel is obsessed with me.  Who know, it’s early guys, like crazy 4 AM early.  Today I want to fuck Candice Swanepoel.

Candice Swanepoel just has not shown up a ton in recent months.  This despite her being in the news for both like… I dunno, coming first in some sort of hotness vote, which I always love because taste is the least democratic thing ever and my friend lunoboom informing me that she would “not be gross to make out with”.  So you guys heard it here first (unless you follow her, then you heard it there first) it would not be gross to make out with Candice Swanepoel.  That’s the sort of hard hitting investigative journalism you come here for I am sure.  Anyway, I put up pictures of her in her underwear today not because I have any sort of thing for underwear but because I found a picture I liked and decided to go with a theme.  And it is really easy to find pictures of her in her underwear.  Never let it be said that I am not willing to put in minimal effort for you guys.  There you have it, Candice Swanepoel, hotness of the people, not gross to make out with, she wears underwear.  That’s why today I want to fuck Candice Swanepoel.

I posted Mandy Morbid once a bajillion years ago.   I posted her then because she is gorgeous.  She still is gorgeous so here is more of her.  I twas remarkably hard to find pictures of her where she wasn’t naked.  I realize that sounds like a complaint but digging through pictures of her naked was actually not that bad.  I am willing to do that again.  For the sake of all of you, my followers.  I will make that sacrifice.  Anyway, if you didn’t know she has a tumblr, it’s located here.  It is interesting because you get to know about her and her battle with a degenerative genetic condition called EDS.  I knew nothing about it before she announced she had it and it sounds horrible.  What I know is she is brave and fascinating and funny and seems to have a truly kind soul.  I wish her the best and I feel like reading some of her blog would be good for everyone.  Also, you know, pictures of her.  Which is the real reason she’s here, she’s here because she’s gorgeous.  So that’s it, today I want to fuck Mandy Morbid.

Sometimes I honestly have trouble writing about someone here because I feel like there is nothing more I can say and like… my words are redundant.  Like today.  I want to basically just type, “Uh… Duh… look at her”.  While I admit this is not the most eloquent argument I feel like it is extremely compelling.  I don’t think there is anything I could type that would convince you that Emily Ratajkowski is desirable more than looking at Emily Ratajkowski would.  I could talk about how much I enjoy her work and whatever but would you care?  Cause I mean, look at her.  Right?  Right.  Today I want to fuck Emily Ratajkowski.

Normally I write about what makes people so great but I have done that a bunch and sadly this time I am going to have to write about some pretty gaping flaws in pigeonfoo because they need to be said.  Her big flaws, as far as I can tell are:

  1. There is only one of her.  This leaves the world dangerously Foo-deficiant.  What if there is a some sort of emergency in San Francisco and like,… London at the same time and the only solution is some Pigeon Foo.  Due to her poor planning and the limits of she’d really be able to only go to one place
  2. She might be hording all the awesome.  I know from experience that she is pretty awesome and the truth is I have met a fair number of people on the internet and a good number of them are painfully lame.  Maybe it’s cause Pigeon Foo is using all the awesome.  Not so cool.

Now, the big question is how she got so awesome, there are lots of theories on this (by theories I mean bullshit I am making up as we speak but it’s cool, I am an expert on awesome.  I spent my childhood playing totally rad video games, watching the most badass movies and one time my friend and I created a super villain who had the body of a gorilla, robot arms, and shot chainsaws out of his mouth.  That’s pretty friggin’ awesome).  Anyway, the most popular theories are that as a kid she was left on the step of awesome monks and spent her life training to be super awesome until finally she left their awesome monastery to spread awesomeness in the world or she was bitten by some sort of radioactive monkey ninja pirate who worked part times as a motorcycle daredevil, thus giving her the proportionate awesomeness of a spider.  Anyway, mixed in with all of this is the fact that it’s been about 2 years that I have been following Pigeon Foo and in that time her work has gotten increasingly better, I have really seen her  grow as a model and it is impressive but probably her third flaw, as she gets better and better at what she does she’s really just making the rest of us look even worse.  Like a bunch of lame-os.  Kind of a dick move on her part if you ask me.  But… it’s hard to stay mad at her because she’s pretty awesome.  Trust me, I know, I’m an expert.  Go ahead and follow her and you’ll see I am totally right.  And all of that is why today I want to fuck Pigeon Foo.

If you don’t know this, Doutzen Kroes is pregnant.  I am not even sure how pregnant but I’d say more than a month.  At least.  Anyway, in these pictures I have carefully slipped in one where she is not pregnant, as a game see if you can spot which one!  Anyway, I have discussed before my fondness for her and I have been enjoying pictures of her pregnancy as it has popped up, often because it leads to some adorableness like other models kissing her stomach or giving her big hugs or kissing her stomach.  Kissing her stomach seems to be popular.  Note, these are all highly paid fashion models, do not attempt to kiss her stomach if you see her somewhere, it won’t end well, I promise.  Anyway, I am a fan and was just thinking she looked lovely so today I want to fuck Doutzen Kroes.

I am thoroughly impressed with Ophelia Overdose and I feel like I made this very clear in my previous entries about her.  Obviously you’ve read them, I just assume that everyone goes back and reads my old entries all the time.  Right?  The world revolves around me, right?  Good, glad we agree.  This isn’t about me (not directly at least) it is about Ophelia Overdose who is just amazingly talented.  If you don’t believe me (why don’t you?  Do I lie to you often?  Believe me!) just look here at her tumblr miss-overdose or her blog which is extremely rewarding because you get to see all sorts of process stuff.  Really, the talent is unreal because I can’t make shit.  Seriously, I try to make a sandwich and it’s lopsided, I can’t even imagine assembling what is need to make the beautiful pictures she is in.  Anyway, that’s not what I am here to talk about today, I am here to talk about how unbelievably adorable she can be.  She has one of those smiles that is so genuine it feels like her whole being is smiling when you see it and if you follow either of those things or her instagram you’ll see that smile a lot.  Because she smiles a lot.  And she is just adorable, which I feel can be an overlooked virtue for a lot of alt models, so much time is spent on how gorgeous or sexy they are that you can overlook something as important as Opherlia Overdose being just a bundle of adorable.  Well, now you have been alerted.  Don’t forget (really, I am on so little sleep, it’s been like weeks since I have slept well, just roll with me here).  Anyway, that’s why today I want to fuck Ophelia Overdose.