Tag: Rachel Riley

So I guess I am posting Rachel Riley today.  It’s weird, that’s twice in a couple of weeks and like… I don’t think for a year before that?  That happens sometimes.  In this case it’s just a matter of her showing up at events and looking really good.  I mean, she wore a shiny dress to a Gala last night so by law I am required to post her.  She looked really good in it.  I saw a British person say she looked really smart.  I agree.  I know she’s good at math.  She looks really good at math in that dress!  Today I want to fuck Rachel Riley.

Here is Rachel Riley cause she was at a thing… last night?  Two nights ago?  I paid shit attention to the date because British Celebrities just pop up sometimes and you know, the events were a week ago because of the exchange rate or something.  Either way, it was a charity gala thrown by the Manchester United which experience tells me will cause some people to reblog this in utter anger.  Which I kind of get because I like sports but mostly sounds silly to me because it’s about a sport and teams I just can’t imagine caring about.  Anyway, Rachel Riley is basically any red blooded American’s dream actually in that she is pretty, I guess she really likes sports, and she’d be really good at doing your taxes.  Also she has a really nice accent so I feel like at dinner parties anything she said would sound really smart, even if it wasn’t. So you know, basically the dream for anyone.  Except English people I guess. Your accents probably are less impressive to you guys.  You’ve been spoiled.  But yeah, blonde, English, good at math, allows me to be lazy come tax time, looks great in a red dress.  That’s the dream. (Small side note, @wildflagsure lives in England and god I hope she’s good at math because she sells drugs.  But she is having a bad day so maybe drop her a line and say something nice?)  Today I want to fuck Rachel Riley.

Rachel Riley is one of the few people I get requests for.  Which, you know, is not how any of this works but I appreciate the enthusiasm for her.  Like I actually have gotten asks that just say, “MORE RACHEL RILEY”.  Which might seem like an odd thing, that someone would so badly want me to want to sleep with Rachel Riley more often.  Unless it’s secretly Rachel Riley sending me those messages because, well, obviously then it makes sense.  I’m a catch.  I have my own blog!  On the Internet!  I actually think it’s just that the world seems desperately hungry for more Rachel Riley pictures.  Or England more specifically.  I sadly can’t actually invent new pictures of her, just post what I have.  Frankly, we’re all lucky I even know who she is but that’s the beauty of the modern world.  I can buy Star Wars with bonus features from my phone and know tonight I am going to watch the fuck out of it, I can learn about British celebrities because a friend says she thinks I’d like her.  Or actually I think it went, “You should see the dress Rachel Riley wore last night, you’d love it.  It was shiny”.  Which got an eye roll from me because it’s not all shiny dresses but then I looked it up and yeah, the dress was awesome.  That was years ago.  Every now and then she pops up on my radar and she largely seems beloved.  She is pretty and she is good at math.  Or maths as they incorrectly call it over in the UK.  Except I guess some people think she’s bad at math?  These peopel do add an s to something that is an abbreviation already so what do they know.  But, you know, if you don’t think women live by some strange triple standard keep in mind to do her job which involves math she has to be considered hot because obviously a woman should never be on TV unless she can somehow excite male libido but also she should be held to a ridiculously high standard about everything else or else she only got the job because she’s pretty.  So you know, that way you get people complaining she’s not pretty enough while others say she isn’t good enough at her job.  It’s enough to make you think some assholes will find any excuse to criticize and demean women.  Almost.  If you talk to them they’re very quick to explain they might seem like raging assholes but really they’re just all about holding people accountable.  Well… maybe not people, I am not sure they consider women people.  Anyway, Rachel Riley was at a thing the other day and she wears the best dresses sometimes.  It’s the black and white one.  I love it.  It looks great.  So here she is.  Today I want to fuck Rachel Riley.

I don’t really know why I am posting Rachel Riley.  I mean because she’s pretty but she’s one of those people that I shouldn’t even know who she is.  She’s a British TV… presenter I guess?  I mean, she is the person who does math on TV except there they call it maths strictly to make Americans giggle I think. Anyway, she is pretty and pops up on my radar because of the internet.  I happen to like how she looks and she popped up so… I guess on a Sunday that’s good enough.  Today I want to fuck Rachel Riley.

Here is Rachel Riley because… she’s smart, pretty, and English and obviously that’s one of those things I am into.  I have discussed it previously in this blog so if you’ve followed me for a long time you’ll know that’s one of my things.  It just is.  I can’t explain it.  Or maybe I could but it would be boring for you.  What I know is I had no idea who she was until a friend showed me and it was like, yeah, she’s really pretty.  And since then I am always struck by, yeah, she is really, really pretty.  There is just something about her that clicks for me.  Also she’s good at math.  This might seem like an odd thing to add as a reason to be attracted to someone but then I guess you don’t have to do your own taxes, do you?  Being smart is hot.  Always.  Today I want to fuck Rachel Riley.

Man, today has been busy guys.  I am still busy.  I am literally stopping in to post on my stupid blog.  Here is Rachel Riley because I happen to think she is very pretty.  I like smart girls.  I like blonde girls.  I like British girls.  I like the combination.  I am so busy but here she is.  Very pretty.  Yadda Yadda Yadda.  Today I want to fuck Rachel Riley.

I suffer from severe game show envy.  Like the UK still seems to have them and we don’t.  Not really.  It’s not like it was when I was a kid and if I stayed home from school I could watch game shows all morning until TV started to suck hard in the afternoon with all the Soap Operas. But man, there were some sweet game shows on during the day, like I love Classic Concentration.  I had to look it up but luckily Googling Alex Trebek lead me to the answer.  I have to say it sounds horrible but i remember loving it.  And it was paired with a Scrabble game show.  And yes actually paired with it because these were not syndicated shows, these were NBC shows.  Because the TV landscape was different and networks actually programmed all day and with things like game shows.  Anyway, the UK still has them.  I guess they are mostly panel shows which skew more comedy than game but it’s still a thing.  From what I can see.  Honestly most of my impression of the UK is filtered through the internet and friends and like Britpop.  But I know every word of Common People so I am basically an expert.  Anyway, I have tried watching Countdown and have seen a little but it is a ton of work for an American to see it because England doesn’t want us to see it.  Which they must realize is only going to make us want it more.  You can’t just tell me I can’t watch it in my country.  This is a whole lot of rambling to get to Rachel Riley who I have been informed is a mathematical genius.  That is pretty hot if I am going to be honest.  Not because I am way into math or anything, sorry nerds, I was too busy wearing leather jackets and being a bad ass for that nerd shit.  Or more honestly I was better than average at math but it was never my thing in part because I was too busy not wearing leather jackets but rushing through my homework to read Dragon Lance novels in junior high.  It’s always hot when someone is good at something and it’s extra hot when someone is really good at something I am not really good at.  And she’s pretty.  And England is doing all in it’s power to keep me from seeing her.  Which now makes me think she has used her genius math brain to trick me into wanting her.  Which is pretty hot.  So today I want to fuck Rachel Riley.

I am like 99% sure I had never heard of Rachel Riley before a month ago.  I guess maybe I had and didn’t notice because once she was pointed out I was like, wow, she’s all over the internet.  Or at least the portion of the internet I frequent.  That happens a lot, how someone will be brought to my attention and I swear I have never seen them before in my life but now that I am aware of them they pop up all over the place (this is called the Baader-Meinhof Phenomenon and it is a cognitive bias, if you were curious).  Anyway, I had a friend say, “I think you’d like her dress on 8 out of 10 Cats tonight” and like a lot of the time when British People talk to me I was pretty sure she was fucking with me and just making shit up because those words didn’t actually make sense together.  Long story short though, it’s a TV show, I watched the episode, I did like her dress and she was cute.  I knew she’d show up eventually because you know, blonde and British, it’s a thing with me. Sometimes you wake up and you just have a British blonde on the mind.  And by you I mean me because it might only happen to me.  But it does.  Besides, it’s always nice when I post someone brand new, it’s good that I have UK scouts to keep me updated like that.  I could still use scouts in other countries though so you know if you want my submit box is open for resumes.  Anyway, she is pretty and pleasant and her show was silly and fun and today I want to fuck Rachel Riley.