Here I am dating myself again but once upon a time, in a bedroom far, far away I had a pretty solid crush on the character of Rogue.  I was about 13 or so and had grown out of my crush on Kitty Pryde and moved on to more adult crushes.  Like Rogue.  It makes a lot of sense in retrospect, she can’t be touched, she is all vulnerability, and it’s pretty easy to imagine if you were the one person who was able to touch her you’d melt her heart and blah blah blah.  She was about isolation and vulnerability despite being invulnerable, super strong, and able to fly. Those are powerful drugs to the romantic brains of adolescents because who doesn’t feel completely alone, unable to make a connection to others all while discovering new abilities and hidden strengths at some point as a teenager.  It’s been a while but I still remember being a teenager and everything was the end of the world, every lonely moment was going to last forever and it was the most lonely anyone ever felt ever.  So of course once Jim Lee started drawing her in Savage Land bikinis and then skin tight green and yellow spandex I, like half the teenage marvel zombies, fell for Rogue.  Because she was like you, she understood.  And you knew she’d know you’d have a connection.  I guess it would be sweet if it wasn’t so embarrassing but at least for those of us who some day move on to for real relationships with actual people those moments of fiction and imagination are important, especially for those of us who at the time couldn’t have possibly made a move on a real girl, not with all the implications that brought about.  So that’s why she is here today, because I was remembering all that.  The character is so different now and honestly she hasn’t been in a comic I regularly read in almost a decade really but I guess Rogue is like the Moon.  The Rogue of our memory I mean, it’s beautiful and makes us think poetic thoughts and sits out there out of reach.  But we’ll never reach it, not the one we’re really looking for.  Men can land on cold rock but they will never land on what mankind longed for and dreamed about for millennia.  Man will never land on that Rogue either, because the crushes of our childhood will never measure up to the perfect memories we have.  This is all a very strange way to say that today I want to fuck Rogue.