If ya’ll haven’t noticed, there’s a bit of a theme developing this week. It didn’t start that way but it’ll end that way. Today I am posting Michelle Trachtenberg in honor of @femalecelebrityoftheday. Why? Cause he’s another friend I value from this place. Remember yesterday when I mentioned every friendship is different? This is a good example. He has great taste in movies and lives in Scotland and I don’t know his real name but given the facts I have I assume he spends all his time fighting lake monsters, eating haggis, and watching Star Trek. You might wonder how I figured this out but I promise you it’s actually very simple. I’m an asshole American which allows me to boil down all other nationalities to a couple of stereotypes so I only kind of have to consider them people. You’re welcome, now go drink your Irn Bru and play your bagpipes. You’re welcome, I managed like 5 things. I usually stop at 3. Anyway, he tends to have pretty good taste and is one of the few people who understands what it is like to run a blog like this. His is different of course but enough the same that he knows. We attract some weirdos who are mildly offended when we aren’t as weird as them. We get some people who never figure it out. He’s a good guy though and I know he’s sticking around. But wishing so many people probably weren’t heading for the exit. Michelle Trachenberg is the celebrity I associate most with him because, and i didn’t check but my memory is flawless, he posted her every other day for the first 22 years he ran his blog. I think she got passed by like Emma Roberts or Nessy since then but I still think of her as his girl. And well, I have never disagreed that she cleans up pretty nice. Today I want to fuck Michelle Trachenberg.