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You may not know this about me but you might because there is a very real chance I have mentioned before that It’s a Wonderful Life is my favorite movie.  It’s basically perfect and a perfect reminder that my life is pretty good.  George Bailey is one of my heroes, which I guess could be odd to say about a fictional character for some people but in my mind he is a moral ideal to aspire towards.  I would very much like to be as good of a person as he is.  Now, I will probably stop there because I can go on and on for pages about It’s a Wonderful Life and both the light and dark that inhabit it.  I won’t though, I bring it up because to me it also embodies a great deal of what I look for in a Christmas movie.  It didn’t even begin it’s life as one but has become one because it is one with cynical people and cynicism deeply embedded in it but in the end some form of hope and goodness manages to shine through.  Which is why I love Elf so much.  It’s easily my favorite Christmas movie of the past… however long it’s been.  It is a movie that works entirely because it is a cynical world inhabited by cynical people except one man who is truly earnest and sincere and just how someone who truly believes in the best in people can change things.  Her career is so different now I cannot imagine a situation where Zooey Deschanel would be cast as the cynical, hopeless one anymore.  It is the opposite of her image and that is the trap of a successful actor, we have a public image in mind and we want them to stick to it. Honestly, Zooey in Elf is like the evil opposite universe her, blonde hair, dour, hates singing.  It is a little strange to see.  None of that is my point though.  My point is I happen to like Christmas.  I like the chance to remember kindness and love.  I like good Christmas movies.  I like Elf.  I just wanted to get to talk about it and Zooey is gorgeous.  I actually love Zooey Deschanel, I find her endlessly charming.  Anyway, why don’t you go ahead and tell me what your favorite Christmas movie is down below, I am always interested in knowing things like that. Today I want to fuck Zooey Deschanel.

Today feels like a Mosh kinda day.  I don’t know why it does.  I am not even sure I can articulate exactly what a Mosh kinda day is.  That’s a problem since this blog is about articulating these kind of things.  Now, I could say some sort of bullshit about a picture being worth a thousand words and push the onus back on you somehow but I won’t do that.  I happen to think Mosh is among the most beautiful people on the planet, she just is.  So a Mosh kind of day is a day when I remember that and spend a bit just looking at her face and realize I have to post her because pretty much anyone else would pale in comparison.  I still haven’t explained it quite right but forgive me, I am distracted by her beauty.  Today I want to fuck Miss Mosh.

So I had a dream last night that Taylor Swift won all the awards and people were pretty angry about it.  I mean she won all the awards.  Like best new rap artist and Best Visual Effects and so on.  People were pretty upset but in my dream for whatever reason my attitude was, “Who cares, awards are bullshit”.  Which is true.  Awards are bullshit, stop caring.  All these major awards are industries giving themselves awards.  I knew this kid in Elementary school who used to cut up blue construction paper in art class and make herself blue ribbons declaring her the best at this and that.  Even then I knew it was bullshit, there wasn’t very intense vetting going on in that awards process.  Like the only qualifier to be the best there was being the first person to get scissors and construction paper.  So, you know, awards don’t really matter.  And sometimes people need to feel special.  Actually, scratch that, everyone needs to feel special.  No one wants to go through life never feeling special.  Some people maybe need it too badly but in general people have that need.  So try not to be to hard on anyone.  That said, yeah, you can get mad if Taylor Swift ends up winning awards for things she is in no way associated with.  Because that would be silly.  This doesn’t really have a point I guess, I just rambled on about my dreams.  Which is a pretty lame entry but ask yourself, who is really the lame one because apparently you read all the way to this point.  Sucker.  Today I want to fuck Taylor Swift.

Christmas is right around the corner and here is Candice Swanepoel.  You might wonder what those two things have to do with each other.  The answer is nothing!  They just are both true.  I kinda don’t have a ton to say.  Today is one of those days where I was hemming and hawing about who to pick and I settled on Candice Swanepoel because there are always pictures of Candice Swanepoel waiting to be placed on the internet.  It’s science fact.  If you blink there will be new ones.  Which works out ok on account of her being quite attractive.  Today I want to fuck Candice Swanepoel.

I was glancing around the internet the other day and somehow stumbled onto some old article about “2011 Buzzbands” and Lana Del Rey was listed there and my first thought was, “Oh my god, has it been that long?"  And yeah, it turns out it’s been that long.  It’s kind of nuts to be honest.  It’s just kind of crazy how fame cycles work, where she went from being talked about all over the internet, a darling to a villain to being declared a failure to… whatever.  I am not sure what place she holds in the pop culture landscape now.  She was labelled a failure but she seems to have her fans, she certainly sold a lot of records, she is making a living, so failure seems wrong.  She isn’t… buzz worthy anymore though?  By which I mean she isn’t driving page views for various snarky internet publications, people aren’t just sitting around talking about her.  She’s clearly important enough that she keeps showing up in magazines and stuff.  I don’t know, none of this is really important, it’s just always a subject of fascination to me how we like to set up idols, crush idols, destroy idols, eat our idols and so forth.  Anyway, I happen to still enjoy her and her music and think she is quite pretty so she’s here today.  Today I want to fuck Lana Del Rey.

I was watching a thing about the rise and fall of G4, which was a little strange because I never watched G4.  I mean, I must have, at some point, at some time seen something on G4.  I know I saw clips from Attack of the Show.  But I don’t have any distinct memory of watching it.  Certainly I didn’t know which channel it was.  But hearing G4 makes me think of Olivia Munn because she was that big of a deal.  Kinda.  Like, I don’t know how I knew who she was but I was aware she was a thing and people liked her more than I was aware of what the name of the show she was on was called.  It was this weird thing where her personal fame outstripped the thing she was famous for very quickly.  And I get it, she was funny and pretty and divisive which is a pretty good combination for getting talked about. Anyway, it had me thinking about her, which means she’s here.  It’s funny, I can go like months forgetting she even exists but when I remember it’s like, oh yeah, she’s pretty hot.  Today I want to fuck Olivia Munn.

Anna Kendrick is feverishly promoting Into the Woods at the moment but she’s here because I finally got around to seeing Happy Christmas.  It felt wrong to watch it in June.  Also I was in no rush because Joe Swanberg movies are… never bad but always leave me a little cold.  Like they are ok but could be better.  Anyway, it makes more sense to watch it in December.  Being on Netflix helps.  I probably enjoyed it more than any other Swanberg movie though and it was 100% because Anna Kendrick is fucking delightful.  This isnt like news, I didn’t just discover this, I am well aware she is among the most charming and likeable people in Hollywood.  I am just saying, she is fucking delightful.  She was great.  She’s always great.  She’s just so damn good at what she does and I can’t even begin to explain how much that makes me like someone.  On top of that she’ just all Anna Kendricky in general (being Anna Kendrciky involves a mix of being hilarious, charming, and attractive).  Obviously I had no choice but to post her.  Today I want to fuck Anna Kendrick.

I had a feeling I could end up posting Charli XCX today because of the whole SNL appearance thing.  I just posted her Thursday but I kinda knew.  What I didn’t know is that I would be tempted to post her again before today.  If she wanted to stop me from being obsessed with her she failed miserably in the past few days where she has basically looked amazing.  Including on SNL.  Where she looked amazing.  I thought she acquitted herself well though I read some criticism about her dancing (did she dance?  I didn’t notice.  It’s very interesting that your criticism is of a singer is their dancing.  We got some dancing a few weeks ago and everyone noted how obviously lip synched the performance was.  Look, SNL’s music performances are just no longer a vital cultural thing.  Elvis Costello isn’t walking out there to thumb his nose at radio any time soon.  Hell, I remember when someone being revealed to Lip Sync was a huge thing.  Now it’s the standard.  I am not going to get on someone who appears to have actually been singing).  She looks good.  She pretty much always looks good to me.  I am into her.  Today I want to fuck Charli XCX.

I am not really the type to do birthday posts cause I don’t really care about celebrity birthdays.  I hold them in no ill will but I can’t imagine taking the time to remember them.  My google calendar is packed enough with friends and relatives’ birthday, I don’t really need to start adding Kristen Bell.  These people will get by without me.  I am aware today is Taylor Swift’s birthday though because someone very close to me is a Taylor Swift super fan and I have been made aware more than once that today was going to be her birthday.  So I guess it was bouncing around in my head.  I guess I know her birthday (but don’t hold me to it next year).  So I am thinking about Taylor Swift, who continues to look and be fantastic in recent months.  I am kind of out of things to say about her because I have posted her so much lately.  So I’ll just go ahead and say today I want to fuck Taylor Swift.

I am definitely sad about Selfie.  Sad about lots of things about it.  I don’t even get to watch it when it first comes out now, stupid Hulu, it takes me until like Thursday to watch.  It’s the worst.  I am sad it’s going to be gone and I am sad that I won’t have weekly Karen Gillan.  Not just because she’s pretty.  I mean I’ll miss her prettiness but because she is so damn charming.  So I posted pictures of her and realized at the end i was posting sad pictures of her.  I guess that happens.  Today I want to fuck Karen Gillan.