Tag: Actress

I felt like I hadn’t posted Ariana Grande in a long time but it turns out I posted her just like a month ago.  So I was wrong.  She is showing up a lot these days.  At least showing up a lot on the parts of the internet I frequent.  I guess it’s now that she’s the lead instead of a supporting character in her show she is getting a lot of attention?  I appreciate her skirts that she wears, I find she manages to make a combo of sexy and adorable, which I appreciate.  I miss the fake read hair though, I really liked the clearly fake red hair.  I liked it a lot.  Maybe it will come back.  I hope so.  Whatever the hair color, today I want to fuck Ariana Grande.

Sometimes it is easy for me to forget how young Taylor Momsen still is, probably because she’s well into her third career at this point.  Probably too many careers for someone who is basically a kid to have had.  I felt for her a few years ago when she said something about not having any friends and no childhood because of being a child model at a young age.  I mean, I don’t think a life of fame from youth is destructive to everyone but… there are people it has damaged.  I think the quality of parents has a lot to do with that.  She seems to have mostly gotten through ok, she just is angry.  I think that’s understandable, we were all angry in our early 20’s.  It’s natural.  Anyway, I for some reason have been thinking about her all week so I guess today it bubbled to the surface.  She is attractive.  Today I want to fuck Taylor Momsen.

Man, I am so tired today.  I had one of those nights where i tried to go to sleep.  And then like 5 hours later I was still awake.  It sucked.  So I am like… not even close to 100% today.  I am posting Gillian Jacobs because I woke up and she’s on my mind.  I am not sure why.  I don’t think I am going to do her justice today because basically I can say, “Hey, she’s pretty and she’s on a show I love”.  She just seems pretty cool.  Today I want to fuck Gillian Jacobs.

Human beings are unique among mammals in that we have big breasts.  Well, half of us do, even the smallest human female breast is pretty damn big compared to every other creature’s.  There have been theories as to why but one that is given a lot of credence now has to do with our face.  Humans are born with abnormally large heads, like 5 times bigger than our heads should be when compared with other primates.  This is because we are born with giant brains.  For our giant heads to pass through bipedal hips we need flat faces.  Almost all other primates have a muzzle or snout that allows their mouth to stick out from their head.  We do not.  Other primate nipples are attached firmly against the ribs but if a human baby had to deal with this it would block the nose and prevent breathing.  Now nose placement is pretty much hardwired in mammals, it’s above the mouth and between the eyes.  That would be hard to change but breast size, evolution can work with that.  Thus babies can feed and breathe.  Thus they can have flat faces.  Thus we can have giant brains.  What I am saying is the reason I have the cognitive capacity to write this every day is because of boobs.  The reason this website exists is because of boobs.  We have the internet because of boobs.  And electricity… well that natural but our ability to harness it?  Boobs.  We can thank boobs for human civilization.  Thank you boobs.  So really, when it comes down to it boobs are why I can post Kelly Brook today.  Coincidentally, boobs are a large part of why I am posting Kelly Brook today.  Boobs guys.  They’re amazing.  If you have them, stop and realize you’re the reason humanity has cool shit.  If you don’t have them, be nice to people who do because without them you’d be a dumbass who couldn’t read this.  Because boobs rule.  And they’re why today I want to fuck Kelly Brook.

I am a little surprised that I like Dreama Walker as much as I do.  I remember when she was on Gossip Girl I thought “the redhead” was the best looking of Blair’s minions but they were minions, I didn’t think about it much.  When I saw Gran Turino I was like, “Hey, isn’t that Hazel from Gossip Girl?  Is that her name?  Whatever”.  And my buddy over at Female Celebrity of the Day is way into her and I saw the posts and was like, “That’s cool.  Not for me but she seems nice”.  Then I started watching Don’t Trust the B in Apartment 23 and during the first episode had the same opinion.  But a few episodes in I realized I was checking her out.  I just became more and more attracted to her and obviously it’s because she’s super charming as the lead.  She just has charisma and a liveliness that is very attractive.  She is very good in what is basically the straight role on the show, a role that’s often not exciting to watch.  She is exciting to watch.  Which is why I am sad, I only have 2 episodes left and I am kind of dragging my feet so it doesn’t have to end yet.  Endings can be beautiful but they are also sad.  Speaking of I kind of like her rear end as well.  Anyway, today I want to fuck Dreama Walker.

So I am watching the much beloved but little watched Don’t Trust the B___ in Apartment 23.  (Seriously beloved, so many people told me to watch it.  So many, like two of my favorite people on tumbr loved it.)  It finally showed up on Netflix and i am watching it.  It is fantastic!  I always feel guilty about watching a good show after it’s cancelled, like I could have done more but… I can’t watch everything and I’m not a Nielson family anyway.  Krysten Ritter has shown up here once before because I have had kind of a love hate relationship with her for years now.  I found her somewhat annoying on what I saw her on but some days she just seemed so hot… and anyway, that’s why she showed up before.  On this show though, she is a revelation, just fantastic.  And she is still hot.  Dreama Walker is someone I had seen, after all I was a Gossip Girl addict, but I thought she was pretty but I didn’t feel anything.  Well she is so charming here I suddenly get the attraction there, too.  Plus, me being me, I kinda want to see them kiss.  Because… kissing is a beautiful thing and the world needs more of it.  Or I’m a giant perv.  Whatever.  Today I want to fuck Krysten Ritter and Dreama Walker.

First of all, Happy Halloween everyone!  Halloween is my favorite holiday and that’s how I ended up with today’s pick.  I was thinking about Halloween and that lead to thinking about Danielle Harris and I was like, “yeah, I could post her” and I was going through the D folders and bam, Diora Baird.  And she has been in a bunch of horror movies.  And is hot.  And next thing I know I am looking at pictures of her.  So there we go.  Today I want to fuck Diora Baird.

I rewatched House of the Devil because, well, Halloween ya’ll.  I’m so excited you don’t even know.  I love Halloween.  If you haven’t seen House of the Devil and you for real remember watching shitty VHS tapes in the 80’s then you really should see it.  It’s pretty perfect.  Anyway, watching it and looking around it occurred to me that the lead Jocelin Donahue is very pretty.  I know, I’m some sort of genius with the way I can look at a pretty girl and determine she’s pretty.  What I want is some sort of basic cable show with either a robot or a monkey sidekick where I go around determining if girls are pretty. Not like a reality show, a procedural.  I’d be the Pretty Detective or something.  Or not, t hat sounds fucking horrible.  Look, she is great in House of the Devil and I have seen her in zero else but I love that movie and some of it spilled over onto her so today I want to fuck Jocelin Donahue.

Anna Kendrick hasn’t shown up in a while and that’s a shame because I really like her.  I even follow someone’s blog just because she posts Anna Kendrick stuff all the time.  Well, she’s here now and it’s basically because she’s awesome.  I know that’s a vague sort of praise but it’s true, I really enjoy Anna Kendrcik as a person.  I mean yeah, she’s pretty, that’s an ok bonus, too, though I think other people may think she is even prettier than I do.  For me it’s her sense of humor which is just fantastic.  Her twitter is a must.  Her appearances around the LA alt comedy circuit are also a must.  Her popping up on stuff like Comedy Bang Bang is a must.  She is just hilarious and I thoroughly enjoy hearing her talk.  So that’s why she’s here, because she’s enjoyable and this is my 600th post so I’ll do whatever I want.  Today I want to fuck Anna Kendrick.

Kat Dennings makes her return.  I wasn’t sure when she would because I don’t watch 2 Broke Girls anymore which means I have to rely on movies to think of her.  Well I rewatched Thor, where she is a wonderful bit of light heartedness.  And of course she is attractive.  Really though, she is just so pleasant to watch on screen, the girl just is loaded with charisma.  But yeah also she’s hot.  Whatever my reasons, today I want to fuck Kat Dennings.