Tag: blonde

I have been out enjoying the sun all weekend and so went with maybe the easiest thing to post today, Candice Swanepoel in a bikini.  Pictures of Candice Swanepoel in swimwear might be our most abundant natural resources.  If we could generate electricity from them we would enter a new golden age. Now, by and large I find bikinis boring, at least I find the idea that that is what you want to see a girl in boring.  Clothing is often way more interesting than no clothing.  But aside from the lot of skin factor I can get the appeal sometimes.  The beach is one of my favorite places on Earth. And I don’t think it’s a mistake that you rarely see a model modeling a bikini in front of a blank white drop cloth.  That would show off the bikini as well, right?  But it wouldn’t sell people one what you’re really selling them, which is a ticket to paradise.  Not Eddie Money style but that this bikini is just going to be a key part of your trip to the most wonderful place on earth.  And so when I post someone in a bikini it is usually like that.  Because I am a sucker for it to.  Candice Swanepoel is hot but man the beach is great.  Together I guess it’s like peanut butter and chocolate.  Whatever, I am rambling.  Today I want to fuck Candice Swanepoel.

I was excited when Rachel McAdams was cast for True Detectives, not because of the whole female characters controversy from the first season (not because I don’t see that as an issue but I knew adding a female lead wouldn’t suddenly make the show feminist or unproblematic or whatever you want.  I think these are important things to discuss as a cultural issue, I am not sure they are necessarily always valid criticisms of arts quality, just valid criticisms of the culture as a whole) but because I happen to like Rachel McAdams and never see her in anything. She largely sticks to the Rom-Com circuit and that’s not my bag.  I am not one to impugn an entire genre so I am going to impugn an entire genre here, by and large Rom Coms are the most guilty of the thing I like the least in art and that is striving for mediocrity..  I watch a lot of bad movies but by and large the bad movies I watch are not cynical, they are not calculating, they are full of passion and people who just weren’t talented enough to make something good.  But I am moved by the passion, by the desire to create.  A lot of mainstream movies, and Rom Coms do seem to be the most guilty of this, have no passion, they are cold, soulless calculations that don’t try to be good.  They don’t want to be good.  They don’t want to be anyone’s favorite movie and they have no interest in being great.  They are made by skilled craftsmen so they never look amateurish, they are never bad, but they don’t try to be good, they try to be inoffensive and bland and entirely forgettable.  Every genre has this, look at any horror movie that tries to capitalize on the success of a great horror movie, but it always seemed like Rom Coms are built on this entirely.  I realize I went off on a bit of a tangent there but you know… you should be used to it by now.  Anyway, thus I don’t see a lot of Rachel McAdams and it’s a shame.  Because I like her.  So when it was announced she had been cast I was sure she’d show up some Monday.  Today is that Monday.  Today I want to fuck Rachel McAdams.

Here is Natalie Dormer doing various things at Comic Con because why
not.  I am tired, it is rainy and shitty out, I am not in the best mood
so… there you go.  I smiled a lot when I saw the picture of her with
her little Vinyl figure.  I don’t have much more to say than that.  Today I want to fuck Natalie Dormer.

Amanda Seyfried is interesting because I realize at this point it has been more than a decade that she has just been a pop culture presence in my life.  Things change a lot in a decade.  I certainly have.  I think our perceptions on celebrities do as well.  I can’t think of any particularly radical shift in how people view her in that time but she does feel like a completely different person than the one who appeared in Mean Girls and in Veronica Mars.  I don’t really have a point here, it’s just me noticing how time continues to flow swiftly forward.  She has always been pretty.  I thought she looked pretty in the Marie Claire photos that showed up everywhere yesterday.  So today I want to fuck Amanda Seyfried.

I watched the remake of Carrie last night.  I haven’t exactly been in a rush to do this, which you might be able to tell since it came out over a year ago. It was disappointing on a couple of levels.  First because it just wasn’t very good.  it also had nothing particular to object to, it just had nothing to recommend it.  That’s almost worse, just a very bland movie that didn’t seem like it had anything to say.  Given the subject matter it’s a little shocking because it almost feels like there should be too much to say.  My second disappointment though was it was another so what role for Chloe Moretz.  This is disappointing because I think she is actually a pretty good actor.  Like, good enough that as a little kid I took notice and was like, “Hey, that kid is a really good actor”.  And she wasn’t bad in this.  She was actually pretty good in some parts.  But it is just another movie she’s been in that wasn’t that good.  It’s disappointing.  Anyway, here she is because she is a good actress and you know, I like talking about stuff.  Also she’s pretty.  So today I want to fuck Chloe Moretz.

So I make friends on tumblr which is nice because otherwise you’re the quiet loner and man the media always has a field day with quiet loners.  Anyway, one of my tumblr friends thunderstormofoblivion has a bunch of major tests coming up because in her country they let you graduate and then torture you with a month of studying for the most important tests of your life.  It sounds stressful.  I mean, I couldn’t do it.  I haven’t studied for a test in years and was always kind of sloppy.  I basically always got by on a combination of devastatingly good looks and boundless charisma but it would be unfair for me to expect anyone else to be able to do that.  So other people have to study and… well, I was going to say you should send her an ask wishing her a good luck but I guess that could be distracting?  I don’t know, think happy thoughts?  She probably doesn’t need good luck, winners make their own luck.  I posted Gigi Hadid because I happen to like her but thunderstormofoblivion is obsessed with her.  Again, this seemed like a good idea but now I am realizing what a distraction it could be, so I have to make up some shit on the fly here.  That is that study breaks are crucially important.  According to statistics I just made up stress is the number one killer across the globe.  So sometimes you need to relax and look at pictures of Gigi Hadid.  So anyone reading this just relax, look at these pictures, because it might just save your life.  You’re welcome.  Today I want to fuck Gigi Hadid.

It’s not raining yet but man does it look like it wants to.  It’s foreboding enough I am reluctant to go outside lest I get caught in a downpour.  I am not anit-rain as a thing, sometimes rainy days are  a great excuse to stay inside and read comic books or play a board game or whatever.  One days where you’d really like to walk to the park though rain is less than ideal.  I think that’s why I posted Alexis Ren.  Because the beach sounds so appealing right now, it has all year, it has been on my mind.  I have meditated on modeling and what makes us connect with some models and not others before, especially when writing bout Alexis Ren.  She is of course a minor phenomena on tumblr in that tumblr loves her and she really owes the level of popularity she has to it.  So I have wondered what it is about her work that makes her stand out.  Not because I don’t get it, I get it, but because I tend to wonder why a lot.  Modeling often makes me think in that it goes beyond “Pretty girl is pretty” but I have a really hard time figuring out what it is.  Recently I saw someone post looking at her pictures made it seem like she’d be really fun to hangout with.  I get the impulse, there is something about her work that conveys a feeling.  For me my urge for the beach has less to do with sun and surf than it does with a feeling.  The beach was my favorite as a kid, this weird place of teenage independence I had nowhere else, the ability to wander to the boardwalk alone, to do as I would with my time, just freedom.  It is steeped in nostalgia for french fries and pit beef sandwiches, for taffy and arcade games, for flirting clumsily when my pack of friends would cross another pack of people our age. And I think a good model gives you a lot of room to project, cause those are very specific memories that I can’t imagine Alexis Ren evokes in anyone else but I think what she is good at is evoking an idea, a very Americana one at that, which is summer vacation and beaches and California and just this sense of how our youths were spent.  Well, some of us.  Those of us who no doubt connect with it. So I am posting her because she is hot but also because it is going to rain and I would rather be 100 miles away at the beach than caught inside reading X-Men comics.  So today I want to fuck Alexis Ren.

Here is Taylor Swift on stage in Scotland because… shiny stuff.  I like shiny things.  I especially like pretty girls in shiny things.  Thus Taylor Swift.  Some times I don’t have a lot to say cause there isn’t a lot of depth to what I am feeling.  I have posted Taylor Swift a lot in the past year, or a lot more than prior to this and it is because she is pretty great and I think we have all largely started to realize that more.   But today she is here cause I really like her sparkly jacked and her sparkly bodysuit, and a her like… I dunno, fringey sparkly thing.  The light up dress is nice too but not the same as something that shines without electrical power. Today I want to fuck Taylor Swift.

So Gigi Hadid wore this jacket yesterday to some sort of MuchMusic awards and it has her last name across the back and it immediately made me think of boxing robes.  I am going to go ahead and say I love this outfit even though I know there are lot of people who are not fans.  I love it because it makes me think of boxing robes and to be perfectly honest I would love to own a nice silk boxing robe with a hood.  It would be mainly red with gold trim.  It would have my goofy little star in the back, googly eyes and everything.  ON the left breast would be a big question mark or maybe the word “Who” with a question mark after it in gold.  If Gigi Hadid wearing this dress gets me one step closer to this being acceptable attire in public then I am 100% for it and you should be to.  Now, I am sure there are some people who see no appeal in me getting to walk around in a big silk robe but those people are dangerously boring.  Once upon a time I complained there really aren’t fruit sandwiches.  There should be.  Instead of mayo or mustard we could use like, cream cheese and load it up with kiwi and blueberries and stuff.  Someone said, “Isn’t pie basically a fruit sandwich”?  The answer is, of course, no.  It is not and people who think that was are dangerously unimaginative.  They are the kind of people who cannot picture a world being any different than it is.  They live under the oppressive cloud of now, they cannot envision a better world and thus they lose hope.  If there is nothing better to hope for why hope at all?  These people will eventually take it out on others.  These people will, even if they would find a watermelon and strawberry sandwich amazing, do everything in their power to stop you from making one.  Be wary of these people.  So I am posting Gigi Hadid today not just because she is beautiful but because she is a beautiful dreamer.  We should all embrace this so one day we might be wearing kick ass robes and eating fruit sandwiches and drinking Margaritas.  Margaritas won’t be new but they’ll still be delicious and you don’t just have to go around changing everything like some kind of maniac.  Just some things.  Today I want to fuck Gigi Hadid.

Here is Candice Swanepoel in jeans cause I started choosing pictures and I noticed they both had her in jeans and it was like fuck it, there must be a few photos of her in actual clothing.  Well, I found some.  In clothes.  And it makes no sense because it’s hot as fuck outside so why didn’t I go the easier bikini route?  I don’t know.  Look guys, I am tired, I am hot, and I am distracted by videos about Fallout 4.  Now, I started to write about the comforting embrace of fascism and how it rules more of our life than we know but that’s a bummer and sometimes even I can’t tie that kind of bullshit into what I am posting.  I mean, she has blonde hair and blue eyes I guess but boy does that go down a strange path.  Better to stick to jeans instead of genes if you know what i mean.  Candice looks very nice wearing jeans.  She is remarkably pretty and is still stalking me as at least once a week she sends me pictures of herself and calls it a “catalog” or an “in store event invitation”.  I am flattered.  And a little tempted.  I just don’t know what the next move is to be honest.  Do I send back pictures of my self?  I am way too lazy to put together an entire catalog.  My ask box is open if you have suggestions to help my self delusion.  Today I want to fuck Candice Swanepoel.