Sorry for being boring this week and loading you up with Fan Bingbing and Jessica Chastain but here we go one more time. I can’t help it, they’re the ones who keep looking great. Besides, if this bothers you Cannes is over, they probably will take a break for a bit. Anyway, Jessica Chastain continued to look good at the closing ceremony and I adore her. So she’s here. I don’t have anything deeper to say about it in the moment. Today I want to fuck Jessica Chastain.
My mind travels down some pretty strange paths sometimes, which is sometimes welcome and sometimes not welcome. Like, Jessica Chastain, who I am posting today, looks like she is having a lot of fun in Cannes. I hope she is. It could all be a lie, she’s an extremely talented actress but you can’t live your life being that cynical. Or you can but I promise you it leads nowhere good. At some point you have to take a leap of faith and just embrace things you cannot be certain of. In this case embracing the idea that a beautiful and talented woman might be enjoying a picturesque French town and the film festival associated with it is a very minor leap. Embrace it. You’ll be ok, I promise. Anyway, it got me thinking there is a very real chance that she might enjoy and appreciate her success more than others because it came a good bit later than it does for most actresses. I feel like no matter how much you intellectually realize at 21 you are lucky to be successful, it will never be a thing you can truly feel until later, after life has gone around kicking the shit out of you for a decade or so. Not that I think life was necessarily kicking the shit out of Jessica Chastain but I saw her guest spot on Veronica Mars when it aired and no one moves to LA to be a one off character on a TV show that was always threatened with cancellation. So you know, I can imagine there were at least times that things felt bleak in her 20’s because there no doubt were people who thought that, you know, it would have happened already if it was going to. So, getting success in her 30’s I can only imagine makes her more thankful for it now. Anyway, back to how my brain works cause this is all about me in the end, that got me thinking about how Actresses also tend to have an age cap, and I think she’s escaped that, I hope she has, the world would be a poorer place with fewer Jessica Chastain performances, but that there is a soft ceiling on women being able to star in movies. Well, they can transition into playing a mom but that’s really about it. And that got me thinking about Professional athletes and how they often blow all their money once their career is over and there are often other issues and it’s like, yeah, no shit, it’s probably pretty bleak to be 34 and realize the thing you’ve done your entire life is over and you will never be good at it again. Lot of empty hours to fill and squander money. And you know, a lot of guys refuse to face it and continue to try and play because they’d rather embarrass themselves in front of 40,000 people than face their own mortality. Which got me thinking about child stars and the chaos that often ensues post fame. And how it’s all the terrible fear of our own mortality. And how basically everything we do is to distract us from the fact that we’re dying. And I got there because Jessica Chastain wore a pretty dress to a premier and the hills behind her in another picture were really beautiful and she looked happy. So my brain can be a real asshole is what I am saying. But there is hope here, Jessica Chastain was 34 before almost anyone had heard of her. So you know, it turns out there is lots of time for lots of people, your best days are ahead if you want them to be. Now forget all this and look at the pictures to distract yourself from the fact that we are all inching closer to death with every breath we take. Today I want to fuck Jessica Chastain.
Hey, so look who is here. Jessica Chastain. This was inevitable because she’s a juror at Cannes this year, which has quite frankly been fantastic for me. Since she is central to the festival she has been showing up at just everything and it means we are seeing more Jessica Chastain than we even see during awards season. It is a delight. She is working hard, which luckily is not a thing she’s afriad of unlike say… I dunno, to choose a random name Johnny Depp. Part of me wishes we could see her ballot when this is all over because I just assume that whatever movies she likes must be great because she must have great taste. Now, I realize you can be a good artist and still have bad taste but I am in general a fan of her selection of roles. I mean, the movies are sometimes whatever but she is great and well, part of that might just be skill but I think she is good at identifying parts that have some meat to them. So I hope that on top of that she is just good at… movieing? I dunno, there won’t be a lack of lists of what was good at Cannes, I just guess I’d like her list. Anyway, she is great and I love her so today I want to fuck Jessica Chastain.
For the middle of the week there were a surprising number of things last night that generated pictures of people I would be tempted to post. And to be honest Jessica Chastain almost made it yesterday but I was so tired and out of it that I just felt like I couldn’t do her justice. But she’s here today because of everyone I saw, Jessica Chastain was the only one wearing a dress I actually liked. It’s a shame when it’s like, “Wow, she looks so good from the neck up but uh… what is with that fringe? That is just not a good choice”. Luckily with Jessica Chastain I very rarely have to do that. Even the stuff that is kind of a miss usually has a simple elegance to it because of course she embodies elegance and grace in a way that feels so natural and just a part of her being I have to assume it has taken countless hours of practice. Anyway, she looked good at more premiers for the Zoo Keeper’s Wife and now at CinemaCon and so here she is because today I want to fuck Jessica Chastain.
Jessica Chastain almost showed up like 3 times this week and each time someone else got posted, which is a pretty clear sign that I have made a mistake because she is fantastic. She really was one of two or three people each day I was going to post and for some reason didn’t. Well, she’s here now because she is doing all of this press for the Zookeeper’s Wife and I have mixed feelings about a movie I have not seen at all yet. This is mainly because I am dead tired and the older I get the more this impacts me and I guess I am a crank. I usually don’t judge movies I haven’t seen because that seems fucking stupid. But part of me is going, “Another Holocaust Drama?” Not that there are too many but they often tonally are the same and I feel like Jessica Chastain can make any role interesting at the same time I would like to see something that utilizes her better, I feel like all Holocaust stuff is the same sort of award baity stuff. You could plug almost anyone in. Then I realize this is beyond dumb because I know nothing about the movie. Nothing. I am an idiot. I just need Jessica Chastain’s output to be superhuman I think. She’s already in like 2 movies every year but I think I am going to need 20-30 a year to really scratch that itch. Some might say I am being unreasonable but I have already kind of forgotten what I said because I am really tired. Today I want to fuck Jessica Chastain.
So not just one but two new photoshoots in magazines showed up with Jessica Chastain and obviously I knew I would be posting her today because Jessica Chastain is like that A-number-1 Boss of New York as far as I am concerned. She is just a great actress but also, it turns out really pretty to look at. And I thought she looked really pretty and it’s basically that simple. I adore her, she showed up, she gets posted. Today I want to fuck Jessica Chastain.
Every year I try to watch all the major award contender films before the Oscars come around. I like to have an informed opinion before I pronounce awards shows horse shit. Usually in my experience there are one or two gems, a whole lot of prestige stuff that is by the numbers and nothing particularly special but is very awards baity and the sort of thing the Oscars will nominate (a few years ago and now I can’t remember who, but an actual Oscar winning director said that if the Academy was fair then the Conjuring would have been nominated for best director because it was the best directed film of the year. But that isn’t the kind of movie that gets nominated). Anyway, this is a long way of saying most years this leads to at least one Jessica Chastain performance and it isn’t an overstatement to say that is one of the highlights of each year. Not because I am attracted to her but because even if the movie she is in is one of those by the numbers cut and paste December prestige films her performance is always among the best I will see that year. I can think of a number of movies in the past couple of years that were just ok but had me transfixed because she is so remarkable. So boy was I disappointed when I realized this morning I have no Chastain performance to look forward to. She was really only in one movie this year that would be considered and it was a bit of a flop. I will get to it eventually but I didn’t even know it had ever come out because it came and went that quickly. I honestly feel robbed. Now I am worried we won’t get a lot of Jessica Chastain on the red carpet because it occurs to me I haven’t seen a lot of Jessica Chastain on the red carpet yet this awards season and good God, it’s like 2017 is really just out to destroy every ounce of hope we have. Well fuck you, I am posting her anyway. And I’m going to watch Miss Sloane just to spite whatever malicious force has this year set up the way it is. Because Jessica Chastain is wonderful and I love watching her work. Today I want to fuck Jessica Chastain.
It’s been a bit, since Cannes actually, since I have posted Jessica Chastain so if you don’t know, she is my favorite actor. I absolutely love her, she has an ability to create a character and make interesting choices that I consider unparalleled. Even something that isn’t good is worth watching if she is in it because he performance always demands viewing. Now, I haven’t seen anything new with her, it is just that she has been showing up in photoshoots left and right recently, which is a good sign. It is the first signal of Chastain season arriving, and it seems to be arriving slightly early this year. I am all of that, give me prestige premiers and award shows from now until March filled with Jessica Chastain wearing gowns. I am down for this. Anyway, here she is because I think she is gorgeous and I just love her. Today I want to fuck Jessica Chastain.
Cannes continues to pay dividends, this time in the form of my beloved Jessica Chastain. She has looked quite good and rose to the top today. It was tough because frankly there are quite a few people who have really stood out so far. Still, it’s not like I need much of an excuse to choose Jessica Chastain. Now I am just waiting on word about the actual movies there, I don’t know what she is even in there but fingers crossed it ends up good. The nice thing about being a fan of her work is even the mediocre movies feature an amazing performance by her but it sure would be nice to get an actual good movie out of the mix as well. She has looked great though, even though @wildflagsure disagrees and I think said she was a gross ginger earlier. I wouldn’t normally sell a friend out like that but just in case Jessica Chastain reads this I want her to know I disagree and am willing to offer a shoulder to cry on if she is hurt by @wildflagsure cruel, cruel remarks that were not at all sarcastic or a joke but just mean. I guess I should stop before I start shouting, “no one loves you like I do, Jessica” because I really would rather not be institutionalized. Today I want to fuck Jessica Chastain.
Hope no one minds another day of Jessica Chastain because that’s what you’re getting! So there was another premier for the Huntsman. There are a lot of premiers these days because you have to hit every country if you’re a certain kind of movie. I am not going to rush out and see it, maybe on video at some point. Well, not video, that’s an archaic way of saying things but… you know. As hot as Jessica Chastain looks with a bow and arrow, which is really hot, I have very little faith in the movie around her. Oh, I have faith in her ability to add some depth to what she is doing but… I can wait. Anyway, she looked great at the latest premier so here she is because I adore Jessica Chastain. She looked beautiful. Today I want to fuck Jessica Chastain.
Who I want to Fuck Today 