Tag: Natalie Dormer

So Natalie Dormer was at Wimbledon and it immediately brought to mind this old quote from Catch Me if You Can, “Why do the Yankees always win? Because the other team can’t keep their eyes off the pinstripes”. Now, there are some holes in this theory because how the fuck would you explain the Cubs for 100 years but I get the general thrust. A con man is saying it and the point holds a lot of validity, people can be easily dazzled and if they think you’re a winner than you’re a winner. The Yankees win cause they’re the Yankees. And I thought of that and I then thought maybe Natalie Dormer shouldn’t be allowed to wear pinstripes. Like, it could make her dangerously powerful. She’s already a living example of what happens if you are made of confidence, you mix that crooked smile with pinstripes and I can only think of it making her unstoppable. Like, take over the world unstoppable. I mean, it could be weeks of us laboring in her salt mines before it dawns on us, “Wait, why did we agree to this?” It just seems almost too dangerous to give that level of dazzle to someone who is already confident enough to convince you of anything face to face already. Dangerous. That’s all I’ll say though because I don’t want to be on record against the Overlord’s regime if it does come to pass. She looked good. I liked the suit. Today I want to fuck Natalie Dormer.

Look, I know I just posted Natalie Dormer a couple of days ago but like… what do you want me to do? Not post pictures of Natalie Dormer? You know who else didn’t post pictures of Natalie Dormer? That’s right. Hitler. Now, I know he has experienced some inexplicable spike in popularity recently but I am here to tell you I don’t want to be like Hitler. Look, the Nazis were losers. Which, some people would try to dispute but those people are illiterate fuckheads so what do I care, they can’t read this. They’re illiterate. The Nazis lost to us. They lost to the Russians. They lose to the winter. They lost to the fucking mud in Russia. These guys were fucking losers. A sad, failed painter and his group of losers. And you know the only thing more pathetic than that? Someone who 60 years later looks at that and decides as a life style they want to cosplay that. It’s pathetic. And I’m a lot of things but I’m not pathetic. So complain if you want about me posting Natalie Dormer two times in three days but you’ll just have to deal with it. Because I don’t brook with Nazis. So I had to. Because I love freedom. Today I want to fuck Natalie Dormer.

Here is Natalie Dormer because she was at a launch for some Tiffany thing and she looked absolutely fantastic. Like, wow, she looked so good in that red dress. And so she’s here because the simple truth is Natalie Dormer just doesn’t have to try that hard to get posted here. I mean that in the sense that she just exudes this sexuality that part of me feels like a single look from her would be enough for most people.. So she looks as good as she does there and what is a person supposed to do? It’s almost the law that I have to post her. Today I want to fuck Natalie Dormer.

Here is Natalie Dormer because she looked cool as fuck at some AOL Build thing. It’s just jeans and a jacket but she looks cool. She always does though because she no doubt is cooler than anyone you know. Confidence is cool and cool people are confident and Natalie Dormer has the kind of confidence that makes it impossible not to be drawn to her. I still stand by my wish that she was the new Han Solo. Not sure how it would make sense lore wise but man, she would make a great Han Solo. Anyway, she is here because Natalie Dormer is cool as fuck and sexy and confident. Today I want to fuck Natalie Dormer.

Here is Natalie Dormer because intense personal research has shown that Natalie Dormer is sexy as fuck. That intense research has involved me seeing pictures of Natalie Dormer as they hit the internet and consistently going, “Wow, Natalie Dormer is sex as fuck”. If the Nobel committee needs an address to send me my medal for this groundbreaking work just shoot me an ask or something. The truth though is just that confidence is sexy and no one exudes confidence like Natalie Dormer. I am convinced if there was a bomb and she walked in and said, “I’ve got this” we’d all just nod and be like, “I mean, she seems like she knows what she’s doing”. We’d all be completely calm until our fiery death because I love her but there is no way drama school taught her how to actually defuse a bomb. It would be a nice end though because we’d all be happy and sure we were going to live thanks to that confidence. And you know, I guess that’s sexy. Today I want to fuck Natalie Dormer.

The EMAs were last night, which are a thing that obviously exist but I didn’t know existed until I started running this blog.  I mean, I knew MTV Europe was a whole other creature because I guess there were like… rumors about it in the 90’s?  I don’t know a better way to describe it.  We weren’t all talking about it but pre-internet the other side of the Ocean was shrouded in mists of the unknown.  This probably sounds ludicrous but it was true.  You’d hear that some band was huge in Europe but it could just be horseshit or it could be true.  You knew that like, the musical landscape in the UK was radically different than that of the US in 1994.  It all could be made up though, there was just no way to know, just this one kid who went to Germany for a week and swore it was different (usually swore it was better because that made him sound more interesting and unique).  Anyway, now I am well aware they are a thing because we get all sorts of celebrities showing up at them and I post every year.  And this year I saw some early stuff and figured I’d post Charli XCX because let’s be honest, she dressed just for me on stage.  It turns out I was wrong.  I am posting Natalie Dormer because oh my god Natalie Dormer.  She looked so hot.  She always has this core sexiness to her, it’s just what she does.  Man though, last night?  She looked so good.  I don’t remember who I posted after the VMAs now but I am going to say that Natalie Dormer looked better at the EMAs than anyone did at the VMAs.  So I guess what I am saying is maybe that weird kid who went to Germany was right, European MTV is better.  Weird.  Today I want to fuck Natalie Dormer.

Well thank god for Natalie Dormer.  I mean, America, you should be ashamed of yourselves.  Really America dropped the ball on the celebrity costume department this year and it took the Brits to come and save us.  Do you know how shameful that is?  They didn’t even start doing Halloween right until like 5 years ago.  For most of my life they were an utter disaster.  They often celebrated on the wrong day, everyone wore the same stupid mask, and somehow despite inventing the language they grossly mispronounced it as Guy Fawkes Day.  Like, I don’t even know how you fuck a thing up that badly.  And yet here we are.  I am posting Natalie Dormer and Holly Willoughby gets an honorary mention for a pretty fucking cool looking unicorn… thing.  I dunno, it felt weird posting it so Natalie Dormer wins out as a pirate because she looks awesome.  Natalie Dormer seems to use Halloween as an excuse to wear old timey stuff which, let’s be honest, is pretty brilliant on her part.  Besides the fact that it looks like a lot of fun, many TV shows and movies have pretty much proven it’s a look that she was made for.  So she’s here and this will probably be it for Halloween posts.  Unless it isn’t because somehow nothing has surfaced from Heidi Klum’s party, so maybe America has some hope yet. Though I guess they need help from a German Super Model to get there. Anyway, Natalie Dormer.  She looks fantastic and I really dig the pirate costume. Today I want to fuck Natalie Dormer.

Late last night I saw picture of Natalie Dormer at the GQ Men fo the Year awards and I knew I would be posting her today.  Lots seems to have gone on yesterday and quite a few people I like quite a lot showed up at things but… man, Natalie Dormer is special.  There is just something about her and she is starting to feel like a rare treat since her exit from Game of Thrones.  She just has a swagger and attitude that is irresistible.  She is just sexy.  Which is a whole different thing than pretty or attractive or whatever.  She’s pretty but it’s her sexiness that stands out.  She has it in spades and trumps pretty much everyone else.  It’s astonishing really what a crooked smile and some confidence can do.  I really think they should reboot one of Harrison Ford’s old roles and give it to her.  I would totally be down with her as Indiana Jones or Han Solo.  Today I want to fuck Natalie Dormer.