Tag: presenter

Big, big day guys!  Today is my beloved @lunoboom birthday.  It’s really worth celebrating because, and I say this as someone who not a liar so you know it’s 100% true, she is the best.  Now, fellas, bad news is she’s not for you, among her many great traits Izzy is also as gay as the devil is hungry for souls and twice as crafty. And by gay I mean she is totally gay for making out and having relationships with girls. Which is, I believe, just called gay.  Ladies however… well, I don’t want to oversell it but this is the opportunity of a lifetime. You should really send her a birthday wish cause you never know what could happen.  Think about the story you’d have to tell your grandkids, that you met through some creepy blog on tumblr.  Then you’ll have to explain tumblr and the internet and electricity but you’ll have time because Izzy will most likely be the Queen of the post apocalyptic wasteland and very easily dispatch any marauding raiders who are there to steal your water.  She is pretty capable guys. She knows more than one language.  I can’t remember how many so I’ll say she speaks 322 languages fluently.  And she plays guitar.  Which let’s be honest, is hot. The Catholic Church has requested she pass their convents on the other side of the street because her mere presence makes nuns forget their vows.  So say happy birthday to her and cross your fingers.  Anyway, here is Holly Willoughby who as far as I know has nothing to do with Izzy.  As far as I know, you never know.  But Izzy recently told me when I was surprised she was into some girl, “Well, I have eyes and I am not dead”.  So fingers crossed her eyes didn’t fall out for her birthday and she can appreciate Holly Willoughby, who is very pretty.  I also have almost posted her a lot recently.  So here she is actually being posted instead of almost posted.  Today I want to fuck Holly Willoughby.

Rachel Riley is one of the few people I get requests for.  Which, you know, is not how any of this works but I appreciate the enthusiasm for her.  Like I actually have gotten asks that just say, “MORE RACHEL RILEY”.  Which might seem like an odd thing, that someone would so badly want me to want to sleep with Rachel Riley more often.  Unless it’s secretly Rachel Riley sending me those messages because, well, obviously then it makes sense.  I’m a catch.  I have my own blog!  On the Internet!  I actually think it’s just that the world seems desperately hungry for more Rachel Riley pictures.  Or England more specifically.  I sadly can’t actually invent new pictures of her, just post what I have.  Frankly, we’re all lucky I even know who she is but that’s the beauty of the modern world.  I can buy Star Wars with bonus features from my phone and know tonight I am going to watch the fuck out of it, I can learn about British celebrities because a friend says she thinks I’d like her.  Or actually I think it went, “You should see the dress Rachel Riley wore last night, you’d love it.  It was shiny”.  Which got an eye roll from me because it’s not all shiny dresses but then I looked it up and yeah, the dress was awesome.  That was years ago.  Every now and then she pops up on my radar and she largely seems beloved.  She is pretty and she is good at math.  Or maths as they incorrectly call it over in the UK.  Except I guess some people think she’s bad at math?  These peopel do add an s to something that is an abbreviation already so what do they know.  But, you know, if you don’t think women live by some strange triple standard keep in mind to do her job which involves math she has to be considered hot because obviously a woman should never be on TV unless she can somehow excite male libido but also she should be held to a ridiculously high standard about everything else or else she only got the job because she’s pretty.  So you know, that way you get people complaining she’s not pretty enough while others say she isn’t good enough at her job.  It’s enough to make you think some assholes will find any excuse to criticize and demean women.  Almost.  If you talk to them they’re very quick to explain they might seem like raging assholes but really they’re just all about holding people accountable.  Well… maybe not people, I am not sure they consider women people.  Anyway, Rachel Riley was at a thing the other day and she wears the best dresses sometimes.  It’s the black and white one.  I love it.  It looks great.  So here she is.  Today I want to fuck Rachel Riley.

I don’t really know why I am posting Rachel Riley.  I mean because she’s pretty but she’s one of those people that I shouldn’t even know who she is.  She’s a British TV… presenter I guess?  I mean, she is the person who does math on TV except there they call it maths strictly to make Americans giggle I think. Anyway, she is pretty and pops up on my radar because of the internet.  I happen to like how she looks and she popped up so… I guess on a Sunday that’s good enough.  Today I want to fuck Rachel Riley.

Here are a bunch of pictures of Holly Willoughby because it’s Christmas Eve and she is gorgeous.  I am not sure why she feels so Christmasy to me but she does.  I mean, I know there is a Christmas Tree in some of these pictures but that aside she still kind of feels Christmasy to me.  Maybe it’s the sort of wholesome air that surrounds her.  I have talked about that before and how somehow it is a vibe she gives off no matter what.  I guess that feels like Christmas.  Also she is here because she is very pretty and I like her a lot.  Today I want to fuck Holly Willoughby.

Here is Rachel Riley because… she’s smart, pretty, and English and obviously that’s one of those things I am into.  I have discussed it previously in this blog so if you’ve followed me for a long time you’ll know that’s one of my things.  It just is.  I can’t explain it.  Or maybe I could but it would be boring for you.  What I know is I had no idea who she was until a friend showed me and it was like, yeah, she’s really pretty.  And since then I am always struck by, yeah, she is really, really pretty.  There is just something about her that clicks for me.  Also she’s good at math.  This might seem like an odd thing to add as a reason to be attracted to someone but then I guess you don’t have to do your own taxes, do you?  Being smart is hot.  Always.  Today I want to fuck Rachel Riley.

I am having some brain drain today.  I have things I want to say about Holly Willoughby but the words aren’t coming.  I apologize, I am sure you’re crushed.  Anyway, she is basically here cause my friend Katherine often tricks me into thinking about Holly Willoughby.  It’s a crafty move on her part because there is no reason for an American to be thinking about Holly Willoughby.  But I do.  Maybe this is how England gets the Empire back.  I don’t know, the end game is unclear to me.  She is very pretty though, which I appreciate on account of being a fan of prettiness.  She is pretty in an interesting way though, there is just something about her that seems… comforting?  Wholesome?  I guess those things but I am not articulating it.  Which I already said I couldn’t do so let’s just leave it there.  Today I want to fuck Holly Willoughby.

I really like Holly Willouhgby’s smile.  I don’t really know how to put it better than that.  It’s just that when some people smile the whole world smiles with them.  At least it feels that way.  There is something infectious about it.  I often feel that way with hers.  I guess she just looks pleasant and friendly.  I like pleasant and friendly.  She also makes me think of a dear friend of mine who is also pleasant and friendly.  So bonus points there.  I had a bad day yesterday and whined about it here.  I am having a better day today but it’s nice to have things that make you smile.  Like friends.  And Holly Willoughby. Today I want to fuck Holly Willoughby.

Man, today has been busy guys.  I am still busy.  I am literally stopping in to post on my stupid blog.  Here is Rachel Riley because I happen to think she is very pretty.  I like smart girls.  I like blonde girls.  I like British girls.  I like the combination.  I am so busy but here she is.  Very pretty.  Yadda Yadda Yadda.  Today I want to fuck Rachel Riley.

I am going to try my best to not complain about the time change cause we all suffer through it but I will warn you guys I have gotten very little sleep the past few nights. Anyway, here is Holly Willoughby who I should point out I shouldn’t even know exists but thanks to my dear sweet friend Katherine who always has an eye out for me I don’t only know she exists, this is the 16th time I have posted her.  That feels like a lot for an American but on the other hand she has taken pictures just for me.  The purple dress where she is on the phone?  That picture was quite clearly taken for me.  Now, you might say it’s really unlikely that Holly Willoughby is specifically posing for pictures just for me and I am tired and delusional.  You might say that but I say if you know me, like really know me, you’d look at that picture and realize it is 100% for me.  There is no other explanation guys, I am a unique snowflake guys, I alone find pretty blonde girls in nice pictures attractive.  So you know, I am here to say I really appreciate it.  I appreciate being told about Holly and I appreciate the effort put for by taking that picture just for me.  Today I want to fuck Holly Willoughby.

So my dear tumblr friend femalecelebrityoftheday posted about the Brits yesterday and said he didn’t know who won.  For the record I am pretty sure Taylor Swift won.  Her dress was amazing.  She isn’t here though cause the day after the Brits I spent my time watching Australian spy shows and that took precedence.  And today I am thinking about Holly Willoughby, who looked good also, though her dress wasn’t special.  She is just very pretty.  I happen to be a fan of very pretty.  So here are pretty picture of her.  Blah blah pretty.  Today I want to fuck Holly Willoughby.