Tag: presenter

I woke up today not feeling well.  Like cough and stuff and so tired I can barely keep upright.  I am not telling you this for sympathy, though I mean obviously it’s the worst thing that’s ever happened to anyone but I will bravely soldier on. I am mentioning this because femalecelebrityoftheday asked me recently if I ever have days where I don’t want to post anyone, like if I am sick or something.  The answer is no but you’ll notice I am posting a good bit later than I typically would.  Often I would best describe it as the spirit being willing but the body is hacking up phlegm.  Also I think it might alter who I pick.  I think.  Cause I have apparently posted Holly Willoughby a bunch when I am sick.  I noticed this going back to look at posts of her.  I was thinking about examining why but I actually decided that’s a thread better left unpulled.  Anyway, she is pretty, and I assume femalecelebrityoftheday knows her cause they’re both from the UK and you guys all know each other, right?  Tell her I said hi I guess.  Or don’t, keep being selfish and not introducing me to any of the British women I post.  This is totally off the rails, the point is Holly Willoughby is very pretty and just kind of comforting and inviting and today I want to fuck Holly Willoughby.

Today is gray and dreary.  There is nothing wrong but when you wake up and it is cold and it is raining and it is still looks dark outside it makes you move a little slower.  Or me, it makes me move a little slower.  I can’t really speak for you.  But for me it’s always kind of a let down.  I mean I am going to be inside anyway most of the time because I have a job and they make me show up to my job if I want to get paid, because they’re dicks, so it shouldn’t make a huge difference.  It does make a huge difference though.  I think it’s why I thought of Holly Willoughby today.  She somehow seems comforting.  I dunno, sweet and wholesome, like on a rainy day she’s make cookies or something?  Or biscuits because she’s British?  That sounds wrong, we’ll call them cookies.  Anyway, there is something comforting about her prettiness and I am assuming that’s what drew me to her today cause I mean, she doesn’t show up on my TV or anything.  So there you go, it’s a rainy day and today I want to fuck Holly Willoughby.

So there is almost no chance you don’t know what happened yesterday if you are following my blog.  I am not really going to address it because I don’t want to, if you know me you probably know my thoughts on it.  So completely avoiding all of that her is Holly Willoughby, who is very pretty.  I happen to like her a lot, there is just something about her.  There must be because it isn’t like I really see her very often but I have posted her a bunch.  She just has a kind of pleasant something about her mixed with her beauty.  So today I want to fuck Holly Willoughby.

I suffer from severe game show envy.  Like the UK still seems to have them and we don’t.  Not really.  It’s not like it was when I was a kid and if I stayed home from school I could watch game shows all morning until TV started to suck hard in the afternoon with all the Soap Operas. But man, there were some sweet game shows on during the day, like I love Classic Concentration.  I had to look it up but luckily Googling Alex Trebek lead me to the answer.  I have to say it sounds horrible but i remember loving it.  And it was paired with a Scrabble game show.  And yes actually paired with it because these were not syndicated shows, these were NBC shows.  Because the TV landscape was different and networks actually programmed all day and with things like game shows.  Anyway, the UK still has them.  I guess they are mostly panel shows which skew more comedy than game but it’s still a thing.  From what I can see.  Honestly most of my impression of the UK is filtered through the internet and friends and like Britpop.  But I know every word of Common People so I am basically an expert.  Anyway, I have tried watching Countdown and have seen a little but it is a ton of work for an American to see it because England doesn’t want us to see it.  Which they must realize is only going to make us want it more.  You can’t just tell me I can’t watch it in my country.  This is a whole lot of rambling to get to Rachel Riley who I have been informed is a mathematical genius.  That is pretty hot if I am going to be honest.  Not because I am way into math or anything, sorry nerds, I was too busy wearing leather jackets and being a bad ass for that nerd shit.  Or more honestly I was better than average at math but it was never my thing in part because I was too busy not wearing leather jackets but rushing through my homework to read Dragon Lance novels in junior high.  It’s always hot when someone is good at something and it’s extra hot when someone is really good at something I am not really good at.  And she’s pretty.  And England is doing all in it’s power to keep me from seeing her.  Which now makes me think she has used her genius math brain to trick me into wanting her.  Which is pretty hot.  So today I want to fuck Rachel Riley.

I am like 99% sure I had never heard of Rachel Riley before a month ago.  I guess maybe I had and didn’t notice because once she was pointed out I was like, wow, she’s all over the internet.  Or at least the portion of the internet I frequent.  That happens a lot, how someone will be brought to my attention and I swear I have never seen them before in my life but now that I am aware of them they pop up all over the place (this is called the Baader-Meinhof Phenomenon and it is a cognitive bias, if you were curious).  Anyway, I had a friend say, “I think you’d like her dress on 8 out of 10 Cats tonight” and like a lot of the time when British People talk to me I was pretty sure she was fucking with me and just making shit up because those words didn’t actually make sense together.  Long story short though, it’s a TV show, I watched the episode, I did like her dress and she was cute.  I knew she’d show up eventually because you know, blonde and British, it’s a thing with me. Sometimes you wake up and you just have a British blonde on the mind.  And by you I mean me because it might only happen to me.  But it does.  Besides, it’s always nice when I post someone brand new, it’s good that I have UK scouts to keep me updated like that.  I could still use scouts in other countries though so you know if you want my submit box is open for resumes.  Anyway, she is pretty and pleasant and her show was silly and fun and today I want to fuck Rachel Riley.

Holly Willoughby has shown up a lot here for someone who really is not any part of my life.  I know that’s an odd way to phrase that because Kate Upton isn’t swinging by to have a beer with me but being an American she shows up all over the place like on magazine covers and stuff at the grocery store.  My life is going to intersect somehow with American celebrities thus forcing them into my mind.  I would have to put a ton of effort into seeing anything with Holly Willoughby in it.  Sometimes I make the effort to find pictures of her but usually I don’t hunt her down, she just pops into my head.  I don’t know why exactly but I think it has something to do with this sort of vibe she just radiates.  It’s sort of wholesome.  Like I saw something once where she was described as the “girl next door type” which is bullshit because I have lived lots of places and the girls next door didn’t look like that.  But there was a perception about her and her looks that she was just naturally pretty and just down to Earth.  Which is all very silly because having that body and that face puts you in a very small minority of people, there is nothing common about it.  That’s the secret of her appeal though, I think, is that it feels that way.  Reality be damned she has just a warmth about her, she has a pretty, friendly smile that seems welcoming.  I think there is just something comfortable and comforting about her.  I would say motherly but that sounds squicky just suggesting it but I think you know the vibe I mean, Holly Willoughby kind of makes you feel comfortable and safe.  So maybe that’s why she shows up.  Maybe.  Today I want to fuck Holly Willoughby.

Here is Holly Willougby and I am kinda groggy and stuff today so I am not really sure what to say except something about me having a thing for blonde British girls. Or something like that.  I dunno, she seemed appealing today.  I strongly associate her with a friend of mine so she is always pleasant to think of because she seems warm and friendly because… I like my friends?  Man, I am struggling, sorry, this could be better.  But it’s not.  She is pretty, I like pretty people, today I want to fuck Holly Willoughby.

I have never posted someone from Youtube before, partially because it almost feels like out of bounds or something.  Also probably because I am not really of the age to become obsessed with youtubers, for me it’s that site where I can watch a music video or a funny video, it really isn’t the site where I watch shows or anything.  Though sometimes I guess I do.  It’s much more in bursts of “let me watch the last 30 of these cause I forgot this stuff existed” than it is “Oh the new whatever is out, let me watch that”.  I have been informed that everyone has crushes or is attracted to various people on youtube but it was news to me.  Apparently I am old and out of the loop, This feels accurate.  Also I was worried that this might be creepy (and as a rule of thumb if you’re worried something is creepy it’s probably creepy) but I have been assured I am way to worried about being creepy.  Anyway, the real thing is this girl here who goes by comicbookgirl19 has a great show on YouTube.  It is pop culture based and obviously comics oriented and it is just very well put together, very well done, and she is smooth and charming in front of the camera.  She happens to like the X-Men as much as I do, which is nice because I can’t tell you how much comics media I consume where people groan when the X-Men come up.  I get it, there is a lot there but I love them.  And I love her channel, which I will link to to assuage some of my creepguilt.  It is found here.  So go watch.  I like it.  And she’s completely gorgeous, right?  Like, that hair alone.  Just amazing.  So this feels extra silly to say this time but it’s the only name I have to go by, today I want to fuck comicbookgirl19.

So Mythbusters is on Saturdays now?  Man, that show changes days so often… I had no idea, thank god we live in an era of DVRs where my shit just gets recorded without me needing to know.  Anyway, they did a Star Wars special, which is like double or triple nerd bait depending on the kind of math you are doing.  I happen to have grown up loving Star Wars, so I was very happy to see the myths addressed, especially the myths that only came from the movies I loved.  And while I love Star Wars you guys really, really love Kari Byron.  Like so much.  Man do you guys love Kari Byron.  I like her too.  Put her in an R2-D2 dress or dress her up like a rebel on Endor?  Man I am so in.  I am going to guess every one of you is, too.  I don’t blame you because I can absolutely say without a doubt today I want to fuck Kari Byron.

I woke up sick today.  Which is horrible.  I mean, on the actual scale of horrible things it’s pretty low but I didn’t want to get sick during the holidays.  I could feel it coming yesterday, too.  I was tired, my throat was starting to feel a little thick, I knew it was coming.  I tried to ignore it but i knew it.  Now I have a cold.  All of this has me thinking about the Neil Young song “A Man Needs a Maid”.  It is a pretty misogynistic song but it has stood the test of time not because of misogyny but because it speaks to a universal sometimes loneliness.  And a need to sometimes have someone come along and just take care of us.  Just someone to keep my house clean, fix my meals and go away.  I mean, ok, not really but I get the appeal when I am sick.  I basically just want some soup.  Then I want to sleep and not really interact with someone.  So I don’t know why Holly Willougby sprung to mind for this except that she is very pretty and seems somehow innately nurturing.  Or maybe I am just kind of lightheaded because my sinuses are so blocked up.  It could be lots of things, that’s the magic of this blog, complex ambiguity.   Anyway, today I want to fuck Holly Willoughby.