Tag: Singer

You may not know this but there is some shit going down in Brazil ladies and gentlemen, some real civil unrest.  Now, you may wonder what that has to do with Katy Perry but the answer really is nothing, it just so happens one of my tumblr besties is not only a half ninja turtle master of seduction and music but from Brazil, and she’s cool and it’s important to her.  So I tricked you with pictures of Katy Perry into learning.  That’s some pretty duplicitous bullshit, I know, but I would like to think Katy Perry wants her beauty used for good, not evil.  I mean, I don’t know her, so I can’t swear by it, but I have seen a lot of movies and if a girl that looked like her wanted to do some evil she’d have an Eastern European accent.  Those are just the rules, I didn’t make them.  Anyway, my basic point is that you should creatively use your lust for amazing looking women to do something worthwhile, or semi worthwhile like just linking a new article.  Ok, that’s just slacktivism but my real point isn’t that anyway, my real point is that today I want to fuck Katy Perry.

I have, to this point, avoided posting drunk.  Mainly because I don’t know what will happen.  Will I just throw up the devil fingers and scream rock and roll and pass out or will I concentrate extra hard to be extra erudite (those playing close attention will realize this means I consider myself to be very erudite sober).  I don’t know, this could be a disaster in the morning but I am here right now.  I have spell check, I have fingers, I have pictures of Rihanna.  So that’s it, right now what I really want is to… well, no, wait, see, stumbling block, the way I am supposed to end this is Today I want to fuck Rihanna.

So I was talking about Katy Perry yesterday with a friend, the conversation went here and there and yadda yadda yadda today I am posting Katy Perry.  Obviously I find her extremely attractive.  You know this because I just said it.  But if you are also a fan of empirical evidence (and obviously you are, that’s why people follow this blog right?  Empirical evidence fans) this is the 19th time I have posted her, which is the second most anyone has been posted.  As such I don’t have anything new to say about her other than she is very pretty, she is engaging in a way I don’t entirely understand, and she has a great body.  Also she has a cat named Kitty Purry and that’s kind of great.  Today I want to fuck Katy Perry.

You know how sometimes you want something just because you want it?  Or maybe you don’t because that didn’t entirely make sense or maybe because you’re not an emotionally stunted child.  Like, have you ever kind of wanted say… ice cream.  It isn’t a burning need but you bring it up and in your mind you just are sure it’s going to go over well and everyone is going to want to go get ice cream.  Then no one wants to and everyone refuses to go.  Then all you fucking want in life is ice cream.  Like haunt your dreams kind of need.  Which is fucking stupid because you even know the only reason why is because someone told you no.  I mean like that kind of want.  Anyway, sometimes Katy Perry feels that way to me.  Not that anyone has told me no, that’s ridiculous, I’ve never met her and let’s be honest, if I did and I told her about this blog, chances are I’d be in, right? (Don’t tell me no, guys, it will just make it worse).  But I mean it is the same sort of builds on itself reaction for me.  I think about her and that just makes it worse, I go down this Katy Perry spiral where when I roll out of bed for some reason she’s on my mind, by the time I am sitting here I have eyes for no one else.  It is strange.  It isn’t entirely isolated to her, I can be a giant spoiled baby about a lot of things, but it is most pronounced with her.  I’d like to think I have the sense that if some other ridiculously hot celebrity walked into my apartment I wouldn’t turn her down but… it almost feels like I would because all I care about in that moment is Katy Perry.  It makes sense.  Or maybe it does because she is ridiculously hot.  Rational or not, today I want to fuck Katy Perry.

I am feeling bouncy today so here is Katy Perry.  The correlation being she is bouncing in the first picture.  Anyway, I hope it’s a good day.  It’s pouring rain, it’s kind of cold, but you know there are other things going on sometimes that drown that all out.  Anyway, Katy Perry is ridiculous in a completely appealing way.  I mean she’s gorgeous and stuff but I also enjoy the complete over the top nature of what she does.  Plus she’s gorgeous and stuff.  Look, it’s early.  Anyway, here is Katy Perry because I really like Katy Perry.  Here is Katy Perry because today I want to fuck Katy Perry.

Lana Del Rey interests me most in that she offers a sort of prepackaged, superficial glamor.  This is not an insult, though it is the source of some of the backlash against her.  I see it as a more honest thing than most.  I suppose it depends on perspective, is glamor something innate to certain people?  Well, looking at Audrey Hepburn would seem to indicate that yes, it is something some people just have.  But I would argue it’s always superficial, it is something projected outward that says little about the person.  It is an image, perhaps in some it is an image they project natural, but we are still buying the sizzle, not the steak when we fall under its spell.  But it’s a hell of a sizzle and I don’t know that it’s a bad thing to be impressed by something that so few can pull off.  Which takes me back to Lana Del Rey.  She also can do it well, though I am almost more impressed by the sort of trashy glamor she pulls off sometimes, which honestly isn’t even a thing that should feel possible.  Still, I have said in the past I am very hot and cold on her, either she does nothing for me or blows me away, maybe this explains it, the image she projects, there is no middle ground, either it’s there or it isn’t at any moment and there just isn’t an inbetween.  I don’t know, I could just be rambling again, all I know for certain is that today I want to fuck Lana Del Rey.

I was working in a record store when Shakira broke in the US.  There were discussions about if she was hot or not and it quickly became apparent that those who fell on the “not” side of the divide had not seen her video, they had only seen the cover to Laundry Service.  So I told them, “No, really, you have to see how her hips move”.  I have included a gif of that for your viewing pleasure as well.  Anyway, the next day one of them came back and said, “Ok, I saw watched her hips, you’re right, she’s hot”.  My point is just basically that Shakira is pretty hot but pictures don’t do her justice, so thank god for gifs.  I can’t say I ever think of her anymore, I can’t believe that story took place 12 years ago but for some reason she popped into my thoughts today and well, she’s hot.  So today I want to fuck Shakira.

I feel like it’s been a while since Katy Perry has been here but really it has only been a little over a month.  I guess that is just a long time in the sense that she has shown up just a ton on this blog.  So much so that I usually point out I have nothing new to say.  That’s because I don’t.  Except that she’s so damn pretty.  I mean, I didn’t even realize until this second but I pretty much just put pictures of her face up today.  I know everyone is crazy about her body.  They are right to be, it is insanity inducing what with it all being soft and curvy in interesting places and a taunt and firm in other interesting places.  I didn’t really think about it today but she is just pretty all over I guess.  I love her body but she has the ability to just look good in general.  Also, fun fact, the name Katherine and it’s derivatives is by far the most common first name to appear on this blog.  Who knew I’d have a thing for a name as well!  Of course, her middle name is Elizabeth, there are a few of those.  I learn such interesting things about myself here.  Today I want to fuck Katy Perry.

I am going to say that Joanna Newsom is probably not a likely sex symbol or whatever.  Or, at least I doubt she is expected to show up on blogs like this.  I could be wrong but I have developed a pretty good feel for this sort of thing and this strikes me as the sort of thing that at least a few people will reblog and then delete when they read the text I wrote and see the name of my blog.  It’s cool, I get it.  I have always enjoyed her music, I wouldn’t exactly call her voice sexy or anything but I really enjoy her version of folk or whatever you want to call it.  I also always thought she was really pretty.  I still think she’s really pretty, though I worry about her voice since her vocal modules.  But she’s pretty and… it’s early in the morning and she came up on shuffle and that’s just how this works some days, today I want to fuck Joanna Newsom.

If blogging Pixie Lott has taught me anything it is that people seem to really like her legs.  I know because so many of the reblogs of her have been tagged with things like “leg porn” and “UNF those legs”.  Well, I am here to say I agree, I like her legs.  So hooray for legs, without them we couldn’t walk and no one would ever send me messages telling me how much they’d like to lick them (to be fair I agree)(to clarify I mean I get the urge to lick them, I have no opinion on you licking them, I am pretty much not concerned with your licking habits assuming they are consentual).  She is of course more than her legs, she is a very pretty girl, just lovely all over.  Of course, at this point it is ridiculously well documented that I have a thing for blondes and that I have a thing for British girls, so she’s kind of a double whammy for me.  Of course, like all British stars she just doesn’t enter my orbit often enough for her to show up all the time but when she does… well rest assured it’s because I was reminded that oh yeah, that girl is really pretty and hits me in my sweet spot.  What I am saying is that today I want to fuck Pixie Lott.