Here is Taylor Swift because today is @thunderstormofoblivion birthday. Usually I go into detail explaining why something that seems unconnected is connected but the connection is actually really obvious. Which means if you need it explained it’s because you don’t know @thunderstormofoblivion at all, which makes me very sad for you because she’s fantastic. You should send her a message wishing her happy birthday or something and then cross your fingers it opens a brand new friendship. Maybe do it before you get drunk today, you want to make a good first impression and she’ll likely eviscerate you if you’re a drunk asshole. And yes, I know you’re going to be drinking today because everyone goes out in celebration of her birthday. I assume that’s what all the noise is about at least. I am glad she was born, too, I get it. I haven’t figured out the green thing yet because she’s never mentioned it’s her favorite color but hey, who am I to criticize, it looks fun. Anyway, she loves Taylor Swift like Leprechauns love gold and terrible sequels, so I am posting Taylor. I sometimes have issues with some things about Taylor Swift but she is a hero to legions of kids who grew up with her and you know, from what I know of those kids I guess Taylor’s done a pretty good job as a role model, because the kids are alright, you know. Today I want to fuck Taylor Swift.