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I actually thought I had posted Fan Bingbing before but apparently not. Apparently, I have thought about posting Fan Bingbing before often enough that I was sure I must have at some point.  She is a Chinese actress who is beyond beautiful and thus I just assumed she had shown up at some point. Even though she rarely shows up in my life.  Maybe that’s why she hasn’t quite made it yet, most fo the time when I see her it’s when I hesitate on this movie in my Netflix queue called the White Haired Witch.  I added it because she is on the cover with white hair (the cover image has changed like 3 times in the 2 years it’s been sitting in my queue) usually holding a sword.  It is I guess about a with with white hair and a sword and I assume she does awesome stuff.  But I never watch it cause Netflix used to think I’d like it 1 star and now that stars are gone Netflix thinks I’ll like it 11%.  Which seems bad.  I mean, describing it it seems awesome but if it is terrible and it requires subtitles… well, bad movies with subtitles are dangerous cause I get distracted by other things, then realize since I don’t understand the language I have lost the last 30 minutes and have no clue what’s going on.  But it stays in my queue cause every time I am just like, “Fuck, she’s so beautiful”.  Which is how I tend to feel when I see pictures of her and today I saw red carpet pictures of her at a Chinese awards show and some in Vogue China and well… hey, it’s time to post her because fuck she’s so beautiful.  Today I want to fuck Fan Bingbing.

Here is Emily Ratajkowski cause I woke up thinking about Emily Ratajkowski for some reason.  It happens.  No reason to fight it.  She certainly looked nice at the Golden Globes last week and I never did post her in that dress, so this is a good excuse for that.  I don’t have a whole lot else to say though except today I want to fuck Emily Ratajkowski.

Here is Candice Swanepoel because she is very pretty.  As long time followers of me know, she is of course obsessed with me, for years sending me nearly naked pictures of herself in the guise of “catalogs” and “advertisements for sales at my local Victoria’s Secret”.  It was a little transparent but in recent years she has switched to playing hard to get to try and catch my eye.  Getting engaged, having a baby.  Now she’s basically just posting pictures of her son all the time and talking about how much she loves being a mom.  Still pretty transparent to me, trying a little too hard.  But I do have to admit she’s gorgeous and this little picture of her promoting some Givenchy perfume popped up and… well, she looked really good.  And because I am such a good person, why not throw her a bone and give her a little thrill to brighten up the hollowness of a fulfilling relationships, life, and family.  I can’t help it, guys, I’m a giver.  Today I want to fuck Candice Swanepoel.

It’s Friday the 13th so that means when the clock struck midnight I started another Friday the 13th movie.  I am up to Freddy vs. Jason in my cycle.  Which is you know… not great.  It’s not as bad as some people make it out to be, it certainly delivers on the whole Freddy vs. Jason part.  Kinda.  But Katharine Isabelle is a good example of why it was disappointing as she was the big clue it was going to be ahead of time.  She was clear about her disappointment in her role and the movie in general when it was being made.  I mean, she was coming off of what was almost an immediate classic in Ginger Snaps, so she knew what she was doing and uh… she wasn’t impressed.  And she was underused. Because she wasn’t given a character.  Almost no one was except the two leads, who it turns out were not great and their characters were stupid (I mean, they were in love but hadn’t seen each other in 5 years but they’re both 17? Really?  In love at 12?  Really movie? I can believe in a Dream Killer and an unkillable mamma’s boy, but the idea that two 12 year olds have a deep, deep love that persists in the 5 years apart and prevents them from dating anyone else pushes the bounds of believability to me).  Anyway, the movie has it’s moments and one of those is every time Katharine Isabelle is on screen because I love Katharine Isabelle and welcome any chance to see her.  Even if she is being underused.  I mean, at least i get to see her, you guys have no idea how hard it is to find pictures of her.  Dear world, please make her more famous for me, thanks.  Happy Friday the 13th guys, resist the urges to go skinny dipping or ignore your responsibilities to bang a coworker.  It’ll bit you in the ass!  Today I want to fuck Katharine Isabelle.

So… if you remember I posted about Kate Upton on Christmas and how I knew she was supposed to be part of the Love Advent calendar and really it was the only thing I was looking forward to but she never showed up.  Well, she showed up today in the final video for it.  5 Days after even the Eastern Orthodox dudes are done with Christmas.  Seems poorly planned to me but I will forgive it because… well, it was a really good video.  I enjoyed it and it reminded me of why I like Kate Upton so much.  It was fun and silly and so… it was good.  She also looked great but I knew that a month ago when I saw behind the scenes pictures.  She did look great though and I tried really, really hard to get a gif to work in this post but I couldn’t create anything that was small enough.  Believe me I tried.  So here are links to some attempts.  Enjoy this and this.  Anyway, today I want to fuck Kate Upton.

The Winter TCAs are going on and have been for a bit but I haven’t seen many pics from them.  I guess part of that is because Globes stuff was way more exciting.  Anyway, Camilla Luddington was there for something, I am not sure what because the sad truth is I don’t watch shows she’s in.  That’s not a moral stance, I am not saying she is the deciding factor, I just mean I have never been drawn to a show she’s in.  My crush on her stems from her work as Lara Croft and given how much I adore the reboot Lara that’s more than enough for me to adore Camilla Luddington.  Anyway, I don’t want to start rumors, god, maybe I shouldn’t even bring it up because I don’t know for sure.  Let me just start by saying that, this is all unsubstantiated but looking at her at the TCAs I think she might be pregnant.  It surprised me, I had no idea but like… the clues are there. She has a glow I guess.  I could be wrong, again, this is just my opinion.  She looked fantastic though and I am always happy when she shows up to remind me that she’s beautiful and that I like looking at her.  Today I want to fuck Camilla Luddington.

So guys I am pretty tired.  My brain keeps betraying me and keeping me up at odd hours.  It’s a real asshole like that because then I go to post and it doesn’t want to do it’s end where it thinks up words and shit.  It’s ok, I don’t feel like I have to try that hard today to explain why Nina Dobrev is here.  She looked fantastic at the Golden Globes after parties and you know, who knows, maybe someone will come along and look better, sometimes they sneak people in a few days late but it seems unlikely.  I just loved that red dress.  Today I want to fuck Nina Dobrev.

So.  The Golden Globes.  Thank god for Meryl Streep, right?  Anyway, what the world is always waiting for the day after any major event is for some creepy pervert on the internet to declare who looked best.  Don’t worry guys, I’m here. I know this is late but that’s on purpose, you have to make sure you see everything.  I mean, that is why I am not even considering after party looks here because there will still be pictures from after parties trickling in Wednesday.  I’d have to be some sort of lunatic to take those into consideration already.  Some of the major parties haven’t had any pictures surface from them yet.  It was a good year though for red carpet looks.  I was discussing with @wildflagsure that last year’s awards season was overall kind of a disappointment.  I mean, I am not trying to trash anything but I can’t really think of a single thing that stood out and overall it was a let down.  On the other hand I can still remember what Jennifer Lawerence wore when she was nominated for Winter’s Bone or what Jessica Chastain wore 3 years ago.  Anyway, my point is this year is such an improvement it’s mind boggling.  My short list of best outfits was 18 people long. So… there are some people getting screwed here.  Anyway, I have gone back and forth on what I liked best and part of me feels like this will be a divisive pick but uh… I don’t care.  I thought Sofia Vergara looked great.  I mean her gown incorporated a lot of things I like, it’s shiny, it has little hints of translucent parts, it was gold, which I feel when done right really looks elegant on the red carpet. I liked the close up detail.  In part I am always fascinated by the reactions the day after and how I will see the same dress on best dressed and worst dressed lists and how everyone speaks with authority.  It’s amusing I guess, since as stated above, I am the authority (actually a couple of people have told me they are excited to see who I pick, which is a lot of pressure, I can’t please everyone and they have very different tastes.  And this isn’t about any of their tastes). Everyone is waiting for me to declare a winner and I declare Sofia Vergara the winner of the Golden Globes.  I thought she looked fantastic.  Today I want to fuck Sophia Vergara.

Here is my beloved Kristen Bell because awards season is upon us.  Officially it starts today but because Hollywood loves an excuse for a party there were all sorts of events yesterday leading up to the Globes today.  Kristen Bell was at one and I am thankful for the appearance.  I am restraining myself from making a Frozen joke given it is in the single digits outside here but it certainly is a nice treat to get to see her on a day when I am just kinda stuck here.  Maybe she’ll be at the Globes as well, I have no idea.  I feel lucky enough that she is back on my TV every week to be honest, I don’t want to be greedy.  But it is a good show, it should be recognized but maybe it’s too early.  I am rambling.  Kristen Bell is here because I love Kristen Bell and one day I am going to have her babies.  Today I want to fuck Kristen Bell.

Here is Tinashe because it’s beyond time I had posted Tinashe.  I have a friend who certainly thinks so because multiple times she has sent me stuff with her either because she thinks I should be more into Tinashe or has astutely observed every time she is placed in front of me I am like, “Wow, she is so beautiful”.  Because guys, she is beautiful.  And I definitely have thought about it before.  I almost did it at Halloween actually cause I dug her costume.  And well… there are lots of almost but the truth is I always feel bad when I feel like I don’t know enough about someone.  I know I happen to like her most recent album but haven’t really dug into it very much.  I honestly like anyone that I feel like forces R&B out of it’s too comfortable groove.  But I don’t know enough, I haven’t listened enough.  I will correct that.  For now I just know she’s gorgeous.  Today I want to fuck Tinashe.