Here is Priyanka Chopra on account of her being at the Royal Wedding yesterday. I don’t really have thoughts on things such as Royal Weddings because they have essentially no impact on my life. I am an American and as such we have three whole parts of our constitution showing our disdain for nobility so it has never meant much to me. And it’s not my taxes so it doesn’t upset me either. So I will leave the pros and cons to the people who actually care and are impacted by it. It’s ok to not have opinions on things that you either no little about or have no strong feelings about. What I do have strong feelings about are the things Priyanka wore. I quite like the lavender outfit she wore. It’s on the silly side I guess but that’s ok, it was literally a wedding with Princes and Queens so going with an actual dragon wouldn’t be too much, how can an interesting cut on a top be too much? But the dress she wore to the reception? Man, that’s killer. I love that dress. So I guess she wins the wedding? Good for her. Today I want to fuck Priyanka Chopra.

Hey guys, I am posting Karen Gillan today because today is @horror-hotties birthday. Which I guess sounds like an odd connection but actually they have a lot in common in that they are both Scottish. Which I assume is a lot in common and that they probably know each other because all Scottish people know each other right? You guys all hang out at the Loch with your Claymores eating Haggis, drinking Whiskey and playing Bagpipes. Also work kilts in there somehow too so I am super obnoxious. Anyway, my point is I am a Scotland expert. It doesn’t come up a lot because I don’t want to get into some Clan war. When I was a kid in Scotland my grandma let slip her maiden name and that she was part of said Clan. The bus driver kicked us off the bus and said our Clan was his mortal enemies. This was because he was still really angry about some shit that happened in the 1500s. This is all for real. So the thing is, I don’t know if he’s representative of Scottish people as a whole or if he’s just a nut bag driving a bus. I have never found out because I can’t take that chance. I don’t tell anyone about my Scottish ancestry now because it can only go bad. Like, what if I blew my shot with Karen Gillan? I mean, obviously we’d hit it off, I am very charming, we have a lot in common in that I am very attracted to Karen Gillan and adore her work as an actress and she is Karen Gillan. But you know, if Clan Gillan secretly hates my family instead of going home with her number I could end up stabbed in the eye with a butter knife. I really want to avoid this because I would enjoy having her number but also I have an unbroken streak of never being stabbed in the eye with a butter knife that I am really proud of and I’d really like to keep that going. I mean, it could cost me my friendship with @horror-hotties because for all I know I am actually her mortal enemy and had no idea. I am ok never finding out. Because I like her and her blog. If you like horror movies it’s worth checking out. If you like hot girls it’s worth checking out. If you hate both then well… it may not be for you and I am tempted to feud with your Clan over your strange stance but I’ll let it slide. You can still click over and look though, it only takes a second. Everyone wish her happy birthday for me though cause she’s cool as fuck. Be nice though cause boy, she will not hesitate to call you out. One of my favorite things was her tearing into guys who decided to well actually her at the start of her tumblr career. Anyway, she is great, Karen Gillan is great. I guess Scottish people are great unless they’re bus drivers but to be safe just mutter something about Robert the Bruce being great and try to duck the rest of the conversation. Today I want to fuck Karen Gillan.

How about some Liz Gillies today? That always feels like a good choice to me cause she is really hot and always kind of awesome. She just seems cool. I mean that in the sense of she has an air about her. I haven’t watched Dynasty. I have even heard it’s good I just can’t make myself. Which is a shame. Maybe it would be my favorite show but then I have these 80’s flashbacks to primetime soap operas and I just can’t. Maybe one day. Oh well. I am glad her show is doing well though because really she deserves it. She’s great. Today I want to fuck Elizabeth Gillies.

Barbara Palvin is at Cannes, which is a thing I knew would happen. First because she’s been talking about it on social media for a month it seems. She really loves going. Second because she always go. As proof I have added pictures of her on the Cannes red carpet over the years. It seems like a strange thing to need proof for if I am going to be honest. Why would I make that up? I have no idea but hey, you need evidence you need evidence. It’s your life. I think she looked fantastic yesterday. As she often does but it was a dress that really suited her, sort of elegant, sort of sexy. She looked good. Today I want to fuck Barbara Palvin.

Doutzen Kroes was at the Cannes’ premier of Solo, which is… well, neither here nor there but she was wearing a suit and that’s often a good look for her. So I am posting her. She is beautiful which helps. Like, Models looking good in clothing is actually their job so it’s never surprising when I see a model in some clothing and go, “Hey, she looks pretty good there”. Though now it makes me feel a little sad for models. Does that mean they are always working? I mean, sure they have to get naked and stuff but a lot of them have done at least a little nude modeling. Wow, the secret curse of being a model, they are always on the clock. It feels there is a new version of Pagliacci just waiting to be told. Anyway, Doutzen looked fantastic and I am sure she would have even if it wasn’t her job. Today I want to fuck Doutzen Kroes.

Christina Hendricks is out promoting a new show on NBC and has anyone seen it? Is it good? I remember getting a ton of ads for it during the Olympics and then forgot it existed until today when I saw she was the upfronts. I dunno, maybe it hasn’t even started yet. I would really like it if she was in something good because I think she is under appreciated as an actress to a degree. That seems odd to say because she got lots of praise for Mad Men but it seems in the culture at large she is her figure first and then… well nothing else. I rarely have seen anything except her chest discussed honestly. When I started this blog Mad Men was my favorite show and was until it wrapped up. The work she did as Joan on there was astoundingly complex. She built a deep, fully realized character and was just fantastic. And yeah, she looked really good in 1960’s fashion but that was a side effect of her being beautiful and the costuming on the show always being great. The thing that makes TV an interesting medium is it is one of the few places that allows an actor to really build a character out like that. A movie can’t give you the time that 7 seasons of a TV show is. So.. I hope her new show is good. I should probably check but I have my fingers crossed because I’d love a chance to see more of her work. Today I want to fuck Christina Hendricks.

So the BAFTA TV Awards were last night and Hayley Atwell was there and that’s the only excuse I need to post Hayley Atwell. She’s one of the most charming people on the planet and as such I am more than eager to post her when she shows up. So happy Monday, here she is. Today I want ot fuck Hayley Atwell.

Happy Mother’s Day guys. I am not doing a Mother’s Day themed post because that seems pretty weird but I guess since this is a family blog there are some moms out there reading this. Maybe. Anyway, I am posting Fan Bingbing today because look at her. She is ridiculously good looking and so fashionable that there oughta be some sort of law. I mean in general. I’m a bit of a libertine, I care about peace and freedom. But I mean anarchy is no good. So there oughta be at least one law I think. Probably more. It’s a weird digression that has almost nothing to do with Fan Bingbing but you know, I’m super tired and I hear people sometimes say there oughta be a law and it seemed fun so I wanted to join in. My basic point I guess is that Anarchy is not a viable system of government and Fan Bingbing is glamorous, gorgeous, elegant, and beautiful. I stand by all of this. Today I want to fuck Fan Bingbing.

Here is Fearne Cotton for no reason other than I like blonde British girls. It’s an easily verifiable fact on this blog. I don’t really have anything other than that. I mean, I just saw some old photoshoot of hers, maybe that’s it? She’s just been on my mind so I am posting her. Today I want to fuck Fearne Cotton.

So I have wanted to post Deepika Padukone because she is at Cannes and I have love what I have seen. Unfortunately what I have seen are basically instagram photos and pictures taken through dirty screens with disposable cameras. It’s amazing how few quality shots there have been. Cannes is exciting among other reasons for the fact that it is one of the few times I get to see stars from other parts of the world getting a bunch of red carpet pictures. I get it, I get the commercial demands and that apparently westerners don’t like beautiful women. It’s weird but hey, what sells sells. But given she was at the Met Gala and it is Cannes, I was hoping for a bunch but so far I am relying on instagram. So I have a real half assed collection here of pictures of her at Cannes so far and that will have to do it. She’s very pretty. I for one will take a stand and say I like attractive women. I didn’t know that was a radical stance but maybe it is. Today I want to fuck Deepika Padukone.