Happy Friday the 13th everyone!  Boy I have been looking forward to this stupid day all year.  See, every Friday the 13th I use it as an excuse to watch horror movies and act like that is why, rather than me just generally watching a lot of horror movies.  It also means I check the calendar to see when the next one is coming.  When I saw there was an October one I was just thrilled.  It is as me as a day can get.  So why not celebrate with a Scream Queen.  My favorite one probably.  Danielle Harris, who is pretty hot and sure has been in a lot of horror movies.  Here she is.  Enjoy.  Today I want to fuck Danielle Harris.

Well, apparently it’s a Madelaine Petsch kind of week round these parts.  I didn’t even know that was a thing until yesterday but apparently it most definitely is because I was extremely tempted to post her yesterday but was so tired that I wasn’t sure if I could and then Daisy Ridley rode into the rescue to save me from hard thoughts and decision making.  When I posted Madelaine Petsch earlier this week I commented on all the photoshoots and promo material and how great that was.  I was excited about Riverdale.  I’d love to give you my thoughts on Riverdale but I can’t because I haven’t actually watched it yet on account of my DVR not recording it.  Well, it recorded it but apparently my signal broke up so I have 1 10 minute recording and then 3 5 minute recordings and I don’t think that’s right.  So no Riverdale thoughts but since Monday when she last appeared, there have been two new Madelaine Petsch photoshoot and frankly she has looked amazing in them.  Especially the Luca shoot, where she just was amazingly hot (I believe the quote from @she-goes-to-eleven was something along the lines of, “By the Great Maple Leaf, she looks great, eh? Hockey Tim Hortons Igloo!”  That sounds right).  Madelaine looked great in both but man that Luca one.  So I am posting her because she is beautiful.  Today I want to fuck Madelaine Petsch.

Boy guys, I am really tired.  I am not looking for sympathy, none of you made me choose my bohemian, party filled lifestyle.  It’s no one’s fault but mine that my life is a thrill a minute adventure.  But the result of my wild night is that I feel like I was hit by a truck.  Luckily Daisy Ridley made today super easy by being in a photoshoot for Vogue where she looked great.  I mean, it was weird but whatever, I’ll take it.  I was obviously excited for the trailer the other day.  I hate trailers in general but I bite on a few, including Star Wars.  I got chills because I am essentially stuck in a state of perpetual adolescence and Hollywood in general and Disney in particular are really skilled at using nostalgia to manipulate the emotions of an entire generation with a severe case of arrested development.  I am not sure if I am criticizing myself, pop culture, society, or the entertainment industry to be honest.  I guess I can criticize more than one thing at a time, I am a remarkably talented individual and my mom tells me I am really smart.  My basic point though is I really liked the trailer and am excited for the movie.  And I will forever adore Daisy Ridley because I love the character of Rey and she played Rey and that’s all it would take.  Seriously, all it would take.  It’s why I’d give Mark Hamill my kidney if he asked for it, even though that would be greedy because he’s probably got a bunch of spare kidneys just sitting around as decoration, you know how decadent those Hollywood types are. Today I want to fuck Daisy Ridley.

So Holly Willoughby did more ads for Diet Coke and well… it’s like my Grandma always said, if Holly Willoughby does a Diet Coke ad you’re going to have to post her.  Apparently.  I mean, I already did last time.  Which leads me to question is this a thing for me I didn’t know about?  Girls with Diet Coke?  Ir it more general than that, girls with soda?  Is it more specific?  British girls with Diet Coke?  Boy, that’s inconvenient, I live in America.  Or maybe I just like Holly Willoughby.  Which is also inconvenient cause I like America.  Oh well.  Either way she looks good and today I want to fuck Holly Willoughby.

Riverdale is back this week and that is exciting because I am looking forward to it.  It really was just a highly enjoyable show for me last year.  On top of that, it brings the added bonus of the full promotional weight of a show that was a surprise hit getting attention before the new season.  Or in other words lots of the cast members showing up in a lot of things from videos and interviews to photoshoots.  Thus Madelaine Petsch is here because she’s really pretty and brings interesting depth to what could be a stock villain character on the show. And I am looking forward to see what becomes of her this year.  And she’s pretty.  Which I just said.  Today I want to fuck Madelaine Petsch.

Hey it’s Sunday so here is Charli XCX.  You might be wondering how those things are connected but I am going to leave that as a mystery.  And by leave it as a mystery I mean I wrote it and don’t know what I meant but if I pretend it’s a secret then I seem interesting and mysterious and your brain will come up with a more interesting connection than I could make up.  Or you won’t really care because you don’t really read this anyway and if you’re one specific follower you’re just scrolling to the bottom so you can misspell her name in the replies because you like tweaking me.  It’s all good because I have Charli XCX to look at.  Today I want to fuck Charli XCX.

It’s never a good sign when it’s almost 4 PM and I go, “Hey, did I post today”. The answer today was no and it’s a symptom of bad sleep.  I don’t know if anyone else gets this but I woke up in the middle of the night and was up for 5 fucking hours before getting back to sleep at which point I am not sure what day it is, because my day has been broken up by too many separate sleep periods and I am loopy and out of it and also terribly old so missing sleep really wears on me.  On the plus side of being up from 2 AM to 7 AM though, is that’s plenty of time to watch horror movies.  I have to get them in somewhere.  This morning I watched the Cult of Chucky, which I kind of liked.  Part of that is just an affection for Chucky and after the silly turn the series took the bigotry of low expectations.  The fact that this wasn’t terrible was a huge bonus.  But also I really like Fiona Dourif.  In the last movie she became something the series never truly had, a good final girl.  I have an affection for final girls because you know, they’re the heroes and you are supposed to relate to them and I do with the good ones.  She was an especially good one in general though.  And you know,  maybe spoilers for a movie from 2013, it makes sense she might be Chucky’s daughter cause you know, her dad is an academy award nominated actor who just so happens to play Chucky.  I of course say maybe spoilers because I am fuzzy on that plot point.  Did Chucky have an affair with her mom or was he just obsessed?  I legitimately don’t remember.  Maybe that isn’t a ringing endorsement for the series.  Either way, the new one is pretty cool and I enjoyed it and I enjoyed Fiona Dourif’s performance.  Also she is pretty.  So today I want to fuck Fiona Dourif.

Sports Illustrated has started doing this thing where they are promoting the swimsuit issue year round.  I get this policy in general.  Like I get that magazines are dying and really there is no reason at all to read week old sports news so about the only content Sports Illustrated provides that no one else can match is pictures of super models in bikinis.  Which, now that I say it is probably something lots of people provide but more these specific pictures of super models in bikinis.  You can’t get these.  And even though Sports Illustrated has proven to be very bad at this, half the times the bikinis don’t even seem to fit right, I guess they have to share them among multiple models and the tops just end up to be too small a lot of times, people I guess just appreciate the effort. So I get all that but part of me would like a world where everything isn’t being promoted on social media all year long.  We should save that for truly special things.  Like Halloween.  On the other hand, it’s hard to get to annoyed when said promotion involves Kate Upton popping out of the water wearing a bikini.  I have conveniently turned that into a gif for you guys (and what a bitch it is to get it under Tumblr’s size limit) so you don’t have to go looking yourself.  I assume no one wants to see the actual video so I am saving you the hassle of having to look at a full minute of water dripping down Kate Upton’s body.  You’re welcome!  Anyway, I guess what I am saying is I am part of the problem because it’s Fall and I am posting bikini pictures of Kate Upton when in a just world I’d be posting… I guess pumpkin spice pictures of Kate Upton?  Sorry I am so weak guys.  Today I want to fuck Kate Upton.

Morrigan is a really kind of unique in that I think she might be the first video game character I remember who was also kind of a sex symbol.  I mean, not a universal one.  I don’t think that my parents would have seen her as such (I don’t know, I didn’t ask.  I can’t say that I want to have that conversation so we’ll leave that a mystery) but I mean that like, maybe she was the first video game character people felt comfortable talking about in such terms.  Too comfortable if you ask me since in college there was this guy who lived in the next dorm who had this giant Cloth Scroll of a nearly naked Morrigan in a sexy pose right over his bed and I think everyone but him thought it was pretty off putting.  I would say I am not here to judge but even now, all these years later, I’m pretty clearly judging him.  Anyway, my point is that it wasn’t the first time someone was like, “Hey, that video game character is kind of hot,” but it seemed to be the first time a large number of people seemed comfortable in admitting it.  And then came Lara Croft a few years later and while certainly plenty of people probably thought people were weird for thinking she was hot, there was a sort of a resignation that people were going to think so.  So I guess Morrigan is important.  In a way.  I feel like she was designed for that.  I knew what a Succubus was in 1994.  I assume many people did and if they didn’t before the game came out they certainly did afterwards.  There is a reason that little bit of supernatural lore always seems to seep into nerd culture and it’s because it’s pretty much an excuse to talk about spooky stuff but really just feed blatant male fantasy (and female fantasy.  I want to be fair here.  I am well aware that @pigeonfoo will like this post if she sees it).  I never really liked Darkstalkers though cause I didn’t think it was a very good game and the truth is I always sucked at fighting games.  So I didn’t like the series and it wasn’t a thing I thought about much but even I recognized that yes, Morrigan was hot and also she had just a great costume.  It’s top notch.  I still suck at fighting games but all the Capcom Vs. stuff has appealed to me because Superheroes.  And crossovers.  And I just bought Marvel vs. Capcom Infinite and man, this game is great.  It is just exactly the sort of silly stupidness I want from a crossover.  The story mode is pretty much perfect.  And Morrigan showed up and you know what, she’s pretty hot.  And also I love her dedication to being who she is. World ending?  Guy with a flaming skull for a head shows up and only talks about vengeance?  That’s no reason to not try to seduce him.  You have to respect someone so wholly herself that she won’t let circumstances change it. So here she is, not surprisingly at all clothed pictures were harder to find than not clothed ones of a video game character, here is what I have.  Today I want to fuck Morrigan Aensland.

Boy, I hope Fashion Week never ends (Fashion Week ended last night).  Fan Bingbing is showing up again because she is the world’s hottest chameleon. Here are four of her looks in Paris for the few days of Fashion Week she was around for and it’s amazing how easily she flows from one look to another and they all look fantastic.  Even stuff I am convinced wouldn’t look fantastic on someone else looks perfect on her.  It’s exceptional really, her personal style.  I really can’t think of a look she has ever chosen that I felt hasn’t worked.  Like that black thing right there.  I feel like that shouldn’t work.  Or at least, that shouldn’t work for the same person who is wearing those big glasses and all white.  It feels like bad ass cyberpunk assassin and stern librarian are diametrically opposed looks but apparently they are not.  Apparently, they are complimentary looks.  I don’t know how much of this is because she is just that good at pulling off all these looks and how much of it is just because she’s very clearly cheating by being ridiculously beautiful but it’s working either way. Today I want to fuck Fan Bingbing.