Tag: Charli XCX

The Grammys and the Baftas were last night and that’s a whole lot of red carpet to go through but luckily my choice was made easy by the fact that Charli XCX was wearing a beautiful red gown and I am a sucker for her.  So is @she-goes-to-eleven, my friend, who frankly runs a blog that I can’t decide if it’s a gay blog that is dirty or a dirty blog that’s gay but it’s one of those two things.  Anyway, it’s her birthday so wish her happy birthday (and by that I mean you know, send her an ask or something saying happy birthday.  It shouldn’t need to be said but it most definitely needs to be said this is not an invitation for dick pics.  Now, to a thinking man, or woman but this really doesn’t apply there, you would realize that a lesbian doesn’t want dick pics.  Well, a thinking man would realize no stranger wants random dick pics.  In general, as a rule of thumb, I would say imagine you were in front of that person, not just on the internet.  Now, is it appropriate to take your penis out and show it to the other person or is it a sex crime?  You’ll find the same is true with dick pics.  But more specifically I am going to say that approximately 99.9% of lesbians do not want to see your penis.  I don’t want to rule out the possibility that somewhere there is a lesbian way into seeing your penis but I believe she is a rare enough creature that she realizes she should just come out and ask because otherwise no one is going to know she wants to see your penis. But, I digress, my point is don’t send Kat pictures of your penis.  This is a thing people have done for some reason.  And by some reason I mean because she’s a woman and all men secretly believe they have a magical penis and that if the show it to a girl she’ll believe it tastes like happiness and… I don’t know, fall in love with him?  Whatever, just wish her happy birthday).  So Charli looked great and it’s nice to have at least one friend that appreciates that.  I am not calling out my other friends.  I am just saying it’s nice to have common ground with people.  Today I want to fuck Charli XCX.

I watched Jimmy Kimmel last night because Charli XCX was on it and I was up anyway.  I am here to tell you that Late Night TV has totally lost it’s luster for me but Charli looked fantastic.  I wish I could show you but it turns out there are basically like no pictures of it so you’ll have to take my word.  I mean, you can trust me.  You won’t.  Not some of you.  I imagine about five of you will take my word for it and you’re the same five who always seem down with me posting Charli and those of you it annoys for some reason will not believe me.  Which is kind of hurtful guys.  But I am not going to be able to convince you when I tell you she was on a set made of white shag carpet and was wearing a silver lined white fur coat and I happened to like both.  And I am not sure why.  I am old enough to remember all those suburban basements that still had shag carpet. Sure it was 10-15 years out of date but that’s how the real world works, you get that trendy shag and it’s expensive to fix  And in a basement it was a terrible idea, it always had this smell about it probably because it was always vaguely damp.  I remember playing Atari in this basement of this house two blocks over, the mom used to watch us all sometimes and i remember sometimes if you set a book down on the carpet it would get stuck and would be slightly damp.  Jesus, why did they shove us down there as kids?  It was probably a moldy death trap. Anyway, that tangent aside, have I convinced you how good Charli looked last night?  You might think none of that is sexy but I am saying she looked good and I apparently have deep-seated negative associations with shag I didn’t even realize until I was typing today.  She looked great.  But the best I can do is a picture of her from her instagram of her getting ready.  Where she also looks great.  But is just in a bra, not a white fur coat.  Sorry.  Today I want to fuck Charli XCX.  

So Charli XCX did multiple live streams on Instagram yesterday and I might have snuck a peak at them here and there.  None of that would have gotten her here today though, just a coincidence that she was already on my mind and then today it turns out she did a photoshoot for Indie Magazine and that also hit yesterday.  I saw the pics first thing this morning.  A new photoshoot of Charli pretty much guarantees she’ll show up here.  Because I happen to be very attracted to Charli XCX.  And I liked it a lot but of course every picture in it that I liked I was like, “Boy, I am never going to be able to convince the haters because of this picture”.  Which is fine.  And probably why I like it, it continues to be her unique style and attitude.  And I am used to a lot of people being wrong.  I will deal.  Today I want to fuck Charli XCX.

I was pretty sure I knew who I was posting today before today started.  When I saw Charli XCX was going to the EMA’s.. well, I just kind of knew.  Then I saw what she wore and I knew of course I was and of course she wore something I quite enjoyed that my friends will all hate.  Like, they never like what she wears and this won’t help.  Well I liked it and so I am just going to lean into the things other people have not liked trend today. I like her, so here she is because today I want to fuck Charli XCX.

Here is Charli XCX because today is my day and I can do whatever I want.  I mean, today is National Sandwich day, a day that is pretty clearly made just for me because no one loves sandwiches like I do.  No one.  I dare anyone to challenge me, I will out sandwich you so hard you’ll forget what bread is.  Anyway, along those lines I also love Charli XCX and I will also fight you about her if I have to.  And since it’s my day (National Sandwich Day) I expect no flack from certain segments about her.  She is great.  Today I want to fuck Charli XCX.

A few days ago Charli XCX starting posting pictures of her Halloween costume on social media, just the costume itself and I got excited because I love Halloween and I love Charli XCX so I was looking forward to seeing it unveiled at some point.  That point is here thus she is here.  Because I happen to be very attracted to her and she makes a good looking devil and fuck I love Halloween.  So here she is because of Halloween and my constant desire for her.  Today I want to fuck Charli XCX.

So Charli XCX has been on my mind for a bit because she has a habit of getting in there and not going away.  She has a new song coming out next week but more importantly it’s leading up to a new album before too long so go ahead and get hyped.  Or don’t, some of you disagree with me on her music but it’s ok, you have the right to be wrong.  This is America, you can say whatever dumb shit you want.  Or you maybe aren’t in America, that’s fine, you can still say whatever dumb shit you want, I just assume the local Duke might cut off your head.  Anyway, she was already on my mind but then she was at a Fashion Show last night and I loved what she wore.  Now, this is where there will be the greatest divide between me and my friends but that is the burden of being a fashion forward clothes horse like I am.  I thought she looked fantastic, they won’t like it.  Again, probably because of growing up in some corrupt form of government with Kings and Dukes and Rooks or whatever the little castle piece is.  My point is it’s ok if they’re wrong, I still love them.  And I love Charli XCX.  So today I want to fuck Charli XCX.

Charli XCX is in Paris for Fashion Week and while some of the stuff she has worn hasn’t done it for me she just looked amazing at the Armani Show.  Now, it doesn’t take a lot for me to post Charli because I happen to find her very attractive and very talented. Still, she hasn’t shown up in a bit but when I saw what she was wearing I knew she was it today.   I did my due diligence checking everywhere else because I always feel like I have to when I am going to post Charli because some people seem to really get annoyed at how often I post her.  I am here to say she won.  Today she won hands down and you’ll just have to deal with it.  She just looked gorgeous.  So today I want to fuck Charli XCX.

I have been trying to post like all day but Tumblr decided to be a real butthead today.  Every picture I tried to upload was an upload error which really puts kink in my plans to make a picture post.  I won though.  Eventually.  Through a lot of pain in my ass effort.  Anyway, here is the Charli XCX post that I knew was coming at some point because I knew she did a shoot for fader and I am pretty predictable with Charli XCX.  I see her, I am attracted to her, I post her.  Wash, rinse, repeat.  So here I am posting her because I am very attracted to her and today I want to fuck Charli XCX.

Another brief one today cause life is kicking me in the ass.  Sorry one person who likes when I ramble on, you’re out of luck.  I am posting Charli XCX because she performed at the LA Pride festival this weekend and I love what she wore.  I saw it and was like, “Man, that’s great, it looks like something out of some bad sci-fi movie from the 60’s”.  Then I realized I described Barbarella.  It would not have looked out of place in Barbarella and for a few of you, you know why that is a plus in my book.  So this just adds to the whole, I love it, everyone else I know won’t list of outfits worn by Charli XCX.  I like it though and so today I want to fuck Charli XCX.