Tag: Miranda Kerr

So there were the InStyle awards last night and I don’t know what they are but I assume it is either fashion adjacent or just an excuse to get celebrities in a room given the magazine it’s named after. That’s not a slam, I am just saying it seems unlikely InStyle has created an award to compete with the Nobels or they have decided that the Saturn Awards can suck it and they are going to be the arbiters of what is and isn’t good in Sci-Fi. Context clues is what I am saying. I’m like Batman with my detective work. Anyway, Miranda Kerr was there and I loved her dress and she looked good. So I am posting her. Today I want to fuck Miranda Kerr.

Miranda Kerr is pregnant (No, not in these pictures. Sorry, I know I often do a where’s Waldo where I very cleverly insert one pregnant picture so you can spend hours looking but to my knowledge she is not pregnant in these. I don’t know for certain, there is no test. I guess you could ask her if she was pregnant yet in any of these but to my knowledge she is not. That’s a fun game, see if you can get blocked on social media by asking weirdly intrusive pregnancy questions about pictures) and she was on Jimmy Kimmel last night and I thought she looked great. Unfortunately all the pictures are just kind of paparazzi shots and I don’t dig on those much so here is um… Miranda Kerr Classic we’ll call it. Pictures from as long as like 8 months ago, before she was pregnant. Anyway, she looked good then, she looks good now, today I want to fuck Miranda Kerr.

I always feel a little wrong posting Miranda Kerr.  Just cause there are so many people who like her way more than me.  And like… I mean, that’s not normally a particular threshold for if I should post someone or not but with her I know a couple of people who she is like… their biggest celebrity crush.  And I don’t know, it feels a little wrong.  I have mentioned that before I am sure.  I don’t even know why it feels wrong.  Like I am stealing or something?  Like… what if Miranda Kerr stumbles across this and is totally down and contacts me.  Then I kinda have to be like, “Yeah, that’s great but I have this friend who really, really likes you…”  Of course, if she read this she is apparently ok with me going out of my way to qualify my attraction to her and that’s vaguely insulting so she has her own set of issues.  But that’s probably not it anyway, it’s probably more that I just feel a little like a poser.  Like I can’t name three songs she’s done but I’m totally still wearing the t-shirt to be cool.  Cuase that’s the point of this blog, I think it makes me look cool.  Man, I have cool so figured out why wasn’t I cooler in high school?   Anyway, some stuff she did for Mother Denim popped up and she looked great.  So I am posting her cause she’s really pretty.  Today I want to fuck Miranda Kerr.

It’s been a slow week as far as celebrity pictures go but then along came pictures of Miranda Kerr in Elle Canada and I am pretty thankful for that because they looked good and give me someone to post.  Now, there are people who like Miranda Kerr a lot more than me so I always feel a little bad posting her.  Then I feel bad saying that because it sounds like I am saying I don’t like her, that’s not true, she’s very pretty, there are just people way more passionate about her and I feel like I am stealing a little bit.  Like, you know, if you were into some band that no one had heard of, then they get a little bigger and now some cool kid is into the band and it becomes the cool kid’s thing.  It is kind of stealing from you, like it was your thing and maybe you should be getting a little credit for that.  And yeah, I’m the cool kind in this scenario because let’s be honest, of course I am.  You can try to argue it but… well, no one is going to follow your blog to read about it.  What I am saying is I feel bad because obviously my life is so rich and full I don’t need it, I feel like I am stealing from the poor, huddled common folk.  Anyway, this post isn’t specifically about self congratulatory arrogance, well, no more than any post on a blog about my libido and how much people want to know about it is, it’s about Miranda Kerr.  She looked good.  She often does but the one thing that always strikes me about her is how right her outfits tend to look.  Red carpet or shoots and she isn’t choosing the stuff in shoots so I assume she has some special ability to just make anything look perfect.  Today I want to fuck Miranda Kerr.

So Miranda Kerr arrived at Milan for the fashion week there and she has looked pretty good.  Thus I have posted her with what I have of that and a couple of older things because… I like them.  I knew what older pics I’d grab actually.  I tend to like her sense of fashion, something about it clicks with me, so I am often on the look out for what she’ll wear either on the red carpet or out and about.  Anyway, that is why she is here.  Today I want to fuck Miranda Kerr.

Today’s pick was really hard.  Like hard enough that in the end I am going to feel largely unsatisfied and second guess myself.  When I first saw pictures of Emily Ratajkowski last night I was like, “Oh, obviously her tomorrow”.  Then Charli XCX looked pretty good, too.  Now here is Miranda Kerr who has dressed in possibly the most me fashion a human being can dress.  Like, her outfit is just perfect, I love it.  And it’s not stunning, she’s a highly paid model who often wears lovely clothing but this time it was like she reached into my head to fine my perfect outfit.  Well done.  Seriously, I love it all.  Have I mentioned i love leopard print?  I am not sure that comes up here very often.  I so badly wish I owned a leopard print fur coat.  Full length.  It would go to my ankles and have a big puffy collar.  I would wear it everywhere!  Like… even to the beach.  Which is why it’s good I don’t own such a coat because clearly I would ruin it. Can you imagine what all that salt and sand would do to a leopard print fur coat?  It would be terrible.  But holy fuck would I look fantastic.  I also am willing to take a purple fur coat instead.  Not quite as good but almost. But not purple leopard print, that would be silly. Just in case anyone specifically reads this blog for gift ideas for me.  So anyway, you mix in the everything else and the fact that Miranda Kerr is obviously extremely attractive and she is here today, I didn’t feel like I had a real choice.  Today I want to fuck Miranda Kerr.

I always feel slightly like a traitor when I post Miranda Kerr.  Or maybe not a traitor but a thief.  I have people I am close to who like Miranda Kerr way more than I do.  Maybe I just feel like a tourist.  I want to say class tourist cause it’s the same feeling as being one of those people who pretends to be poor because they think poor is cool but this more like… a libidinal tourist.  Because Miranda Kerr is obviously gorgeous but it feels inappropriate to post her because someone else likes her more.  And I guess that makes me a poser. But today I am a poser because she is really pretty.  Today I want to fuck Miranda Kerr.

I haven’t posted Miranda Kerr that many times here really.  A handful but not as many as you might expect for one of the more popular models out there.  At least she used to be.  I don’t really have my finger on the pulse of that sort of thing so I dunno if she is a huge deal or not still.  I feel like she is.  Anyway, I haven’t posted her that much and a major part is I have someone very near and dear who is way, way more into Miranda Kerr than I would ever be.  Thus it almost feels like stealing to lust after her.  Which is really silly I guess but it is how my brain works.  It’s like you don’t check out your friend’s girlfriend or something because that would make you a creep.  My brain works the same way with celebrities that I consider belonging to someone else.  I am an interloper and have no right.  I am not sure where that comes from but it is there.  Sometimes I break down though because Miranda Kerr is pretty.  I am not blind.  So today I want to fuck Miranda Kerr.

I always feel a little funny posting Miranda Kerr because she is very pretty but she has never moved me the way she does other people.  I have people very dear to me who are basically in love with her and have been for years.  She speaks to a lot of people.  I mean, there are people in Ibiza getting into fist fights over her and she’s in like Malibu or something at the moment.  Anyway, the past week or so has seen just a bunch of very nice pictures of her surface and obviously she’s a very good model, she’s been at this a while and has her look down and does it very well.  And you know, I get why people like her so much, she’s extremely pretty.  So today I want to fuck Miranda Kerr.

I feel like, by and large, my entries have been pretty weak sauce this week.  But if you are a fan of consistency then today should make you happy because I still have nothing to say.  So let’s celebrate that i have nothing to say! Yay me!  Pointless positivity!  Or… whatever.  I have posted Miranda Kerr a few times before and she is very pretty but I always feel a little bit like I am stealing when I post her because.. I don’t care enough about her?  She is one of those models who is famous enough, or her career is at a high enough level that there are people who really, really like her and are obsessed with her.  I know this because one of the people I am closest to in the whole world loves her and she has been her favorite model for like… 7 years or something ridiculous now?  All I know is then it feels like I am being a poser or something when I post her because I don’t have that kind of dedication.  Of course, this is a blog where i post a different girl every day so I am not exactly as constant as the northern star or anything.  And the truth is she is very pretty and I can see that and some days I see that and well.. then next thing you know today I want to fuck Miranda Kerr.