Tag: redhead

I chose Karen Gillan today because Doctor Who is maybe the most hopeful show about the nature of humanity I have ever seen and I have a follower with a Doctor Who themed name that is pretty great and just started following me.  As I was checking out her blog she started posting some pretty depressing things with clear insinuations that she is considering suicide.  The world is a terrible and cruel place sometimes, it is absolutely horrible the way fate can treat us and even worse the ways we can treat each other.  I know as well as anyone that sometimes the night can get so dark that it looks like it will never be light again and worst of all you feel lost and completely alone.  Unloved, uncared for, drowning and struggling for breath.  Worst of all everyone around you seems fine, you think there truly must be something wrong with you.  You feel like know one knows how you feel and you will never feel better.  Truth is no one knows exactly what it feels like to be you and no one can offer you a magic cure but if you feel this way you are never, ever alone.  Someone cares.  I promise you someone cares.  Even if you think no one possibly could there are even strangers that care.  You are a human being, the very fact that you, the person you are exists is a miracle, there is no reason the exact combination of DNA and cells and quirks and traits you have should be here, it was a chance so infinitesimal I can’t even express it here because it would take too much space.  You are the fruition of 50,000 years of human history, you matter.  I cannot offer magic words and I cannot claim to be an expert, those people exist and those people will help you too but I promise you if you tell me your name and tell me you are having a hard time I will personally care.  Anyone out there can send me an ask, anyone can send me fan mail.  You can even tag me in a post if you need someone to talk to, I will gladly listen.  I promise you I am not along, not even close to it.  People will listen and they will care because you matter.  I don’t know what happened to my follower, it’s very early in the morning and I hope she just went to bed, she stopped responding to me.  I know how horrible things can feel sometime I wish no one had to go through it but if you just need someone to talk to I will be here.  There are numbers you can call 1-800-273-TALK will take care of you in America.  There are so many places, please don’t let hopelessness overwhelm you.  We don’t even have to talk about your problems, we can just talk about… how even during a post like this I will out of my ridiculously nerdy sense of obligation end it by saying Today I want to fuck Karen Gillan. 

I am pretty much solely posting this because Christina Hendricks popped up on my feed when someone reblogged the first picture.  It’s a gorgeous picture.  It’s pretty hard to talk about Christina Hendricks without talking about her boobs so I won’t even try, she has mammoth boobs and I have no doubt for many people that’s a lot of her appeal.  I can’t say it isn’t part of it for me because I have never seen her without boobs.  That said, I actually prefer when they are a bit more subtly displayed rather than falling out of a dress, and by slightly more subtle I mean still cleavage is fine.  I do think besides her chest though she is gorgeous, she has a pretty face, I love the shade of red she’s chosen for her hair, and overall everything works together, including her sense of style most of the time.  To top it all off I actually find it easy to forget what a good actress she is because the internet loves her boobs so much they are all that is talked about but seriously, she is just amazing on Mad Men.  That’s not why she’s here though, she’s here because I thought she looked beautiful in that picture and it meant that today I want to fuck Christina Hendricks.

Here is where I admit I know very little about Jane Levy other than I thought she looked good when promos for Suburgatory started showing up and she has looked good in the few episodes of the show I have seen.  I have discussed before that it is rarer but it happens that sometimes I find myself stuck on someone I really never see in a show, see popping up on the internet or whatever.  I don’t know why, part of me always feels bad, like it’s a classier form of lust if I can talk about how much I love Community before leering at Alison Brie’s boobs or something.  It isn’t but it seems that way sometimes.  We all have a complicated relationship with sex and sexual attraction, I suppose sometimes we need to make excuses.  I really don’t have one here, she has great eyes, great hair, I see her for a few minutes quite often at either the end or beginning of my recording of Modern Family and today I want to fuck Jane Levy.

Ariana Grande is pretty adorbahot and that is obviously a lot of her appeal. I guess a lot of celebrity culture is really image based.  Tom Hanks may not be the nicest man in the world but he seems to be and it seems genuine, we like that.  On the other hand when someone’s image seems false people seem to pounce.  We don’t really know, we just have to go by the vibe we get.  Ariana has, to be honest, a very nice body and is very pretty but looking at her everything screams cute.  She is very cute, what she does is very cute.  In some people this is so grating, you want to tell a girl that she’s an adult and to use her upper register.  In others though it just seems genuine and you think 19 isn’t so old that someone can’t act cutesy and child like.  this is her, thus the adorbahot thing, she is hot but she is also adorable.  I will try not to think too much on just what someone being seemingly innocent is attractive to so many people but sometimes it is and that’s that.  As such, today I want to fuck Ariana Grande.

One of the silliest things people do is try to bring facts to matters of taste.  I actually get messages about this now and then (not as often as I did when I had anons on but… still some).  People will tell me so and so is way hotter than someone else and here are the reasons why and I can’t refute them because they are facts.  Their facts are a lot of times things like this person has been ranked higher on Maxim’s hot 100 the past two years or Jennifer Aniston was listed the hottest woman ever by Men’s Health (remember when Men’s Health was just homoerotic pictures of men’s torsos?  Those were the days).  These are of course, not fact and even more so taste is not democratic.  At least it isn’t for most people, I suppose there are people out there who really are so easily influenced that the opinions of others completely dictate theirs but I think they are rare.  It is an odd human instinct though to so badly need to be right about shit that just doesn’t matter.  Which brings me to Kari Byron.  I have never gotten crap for posting her because nerds love her but man this seems exactly like something Mythbusters would tackle and prove nothing, because again you can’t really scientifically prove who is hotter than someone else.  For some people their first sexual awakening was their baby sitter with the striped socks stretching on the couch and they will forever have a thing for knee highs, others will always want someone to sit on their face because of the time some girl bullied them in 3rd grade and sat on their face.  Or this could all be bullshit and some people want their face sat on for reasons I will never understand.  The point is all the lists in the world won’t change who you most want to see in striped sock and have sit on your face or whatever is your thing. But I bet Kari Byron would be willing to tackle the idea and there would be some overly elaborate experiment.  It would be pretty cool because I like Mythbusters and I like her.  And for very straight forward reasons (she is cute, she is pretty, I find her enjoyable, I like redheads) today I want to fuck Kari Byron.

Let’s get this out of the way, yes I realize now as I am typing this I put up a picture of Ariana Grande in front of a Kleenex sign on this blog.  Yes, I am sure there is some subliminal message there or something but really… it’s just what I chose.  Though, you know, if you have a good joke about it knock yourself out, I’m not touching it (heh).  Anyway, Ariana makes her return and the reason is pretty simple, she’s cute as a button.  She is a tiny girl and yes, I have noticed smaller girls often seem to have this innate ability, though, I suppose it’s more likely learned, you’re tiny, it makes being cute easier, being cute helps you along in life, thus you continue being cute.  We can debate all of that some other time, whether social skills and coping strategies are nature or nurture, right after I run out of girls and this becomes a SocialSciencesIwanttoFuckToday.  For now though we’ll talk about how adorable she is and yeah, it can’t all be an accident.  She could wear leather and carry a whip and cover herself in tats and piercings.  She would likely still be attractive but unlikely as cute as she is wearing pink dresses and skirts and doing what she can to look small and innocent.  Thing is it definitely works, she catches my eye, I do find her adorable, and I find I am often charmed by her when I get a chance to see her on screen.  It’s kind of that simple, it’s why today I want to fuck Ariana Grande.

Sometimes I post kind of obscure people here but this is the first time it’s been so obscure I had to go look up the names.  Not the spelling but like… hey, what are their names again?  It’s also why I have grainy pictures, which makes sense because it’s like pausing an old VHS movie when you realize your bladder is about to burst.  Sometimes I am surprised by how these obscure trips to the wayback machines prove popular but I am guessing right now this post gets like no attention.  Now, I am a horror fan, I think people know that and that means I have seen a just a mountain of mediocre to bad movies that are forgettable except for just one or two things that stick with you.  Like, everyone remembers the Antler death in Silent Night, Deadly Night or Linnea Quigley’s boobs in… whichever movie you liked best when she popped her top.  See, boobs are still considered a big part of horror and they always were.  It seems a little silly now when they take time out for a girl to get naked and honestly even sillier when someone complains that no one got naked in a horror movie because… boobs are everywhere.  It’s not just because I am an adult (though I won’t lie, my boob access is much, much higher now than it was when I was a teenager) it’s because the world has changed.  There was a point where seeing a girl topless required more than opening your laptop.  Your options were pretty much someone’s dad having a 10 year old playboy, somehow convincing a real live girl to show them to you (this was more heard of than actually experienced by most people), or watching movies on premium cable channels.  Which brings us to Night of the Demons 2.  The movie is notable for… well, it’s not notable at all.  I am sure many horror fans have seen and liked it but I don’t think there is much to distinguish it but Cristi Harris’ breasts and Zoe Trilling’s breasts.  Those two girls are basically why I remember this movie fondly and am re-watching it as I type (scratch that, I am re-watching it for nostalgia but I am pretty sure my adoration of this movie is rooted in teenage memories of boobs).  Both of them are very pretty and have been in a few bad horror movies but this movie… maybe it’s just that I was 15 but I was pretty sure Zoe Trilling especially was the hottest thing I had ever seen at one point in my life.  That one point was probably like 2 AM on a Saturday in my Dad’s basement but there was that point.  There isn’t a lot to go into here Zoe Trilling played the bitch slut mean girl who is a requirement to get the plot going and of course ends up possessed by demons and Cristi Harris played the nice girl who… still gets naked early on (And yeah, Ben Stiller’s wife was totally in it to.  She was also in Hey Dude! For most people that means nothing but for a very specific group of people it will be, “Oh fuck, I remember Hey Dude!).  For whatever reason they did it for me and I am watching the movie and it’s like, man, the internet needs to know these two girls who basically disappeared from the world’s eye 15 years ago were really hot.  So, yeah, today I want to fuck Cristi Harris and Zoe Trilling.

It is a little funny to me that to so many people still think of Ellie Kemper as “the blow job girl” or some variation of that.  I guess in part because I somehow missed that whole video when everyone was watching it (I’m human, I keep up pretty well but no one can see everything when it’s new) and so for me that was something to watch after she was on the office and everyone said, “Hey, it’s the blow job girl”.  I guess we put people in boxes like that but in this case it seems so very limiting.  I feel like I have been reading the onion my whole life but more likely only since Tower Records started selling it in the 90’s, but she writes for the Onion.  When McSweeney’s started publishing it’s quarterly I thought I was in heaven and of course she has written for that.  I am actually currently digging through old Nerdists episodes and am on hers and she is just so funny. I mean she’s a talented woman (UCB people are like, always amazing though) but then so many people are, it’s interesting how we fix them in our minds to one job or one thing and that’s who they become to us.  Anyway, none of that has much to do with anything, I happen to find her very funny, impressively talented, and attractive so today I want to fuck Ellie Kemper.

I should start this by mentioning Felicia Day is not mine.  I know that seems like a strange statement to start this off with, no one I post belongs to me, right?  But I do feel a sense of ownership sometimes, we all do with things we love.  Our favorite band, our favorite character, TV show, whatever it is you start to feel like it’s yours because you’ve invested so much into it.  At it’s worst this leads to that horrible nerdery we have all seen where people seethe with anger when what they love becomes popular or makes what they consider a wrong turn.  At it’s best it gives you a bit of pop culture to identify with, to give you instant kinship with other fans and to give you a special pick me up only that thing can.  Felicia Day is not that way for me.  I certainly like her, I am hardly invulnerable to cute but I will readily admit many of the people who like or reblog this (or the very, very popular reblog, then realize the name of my blog and delete your reblog) have much more a claim to Felicia Day.  The girl has fans.  I mean, serious fans.  And why not?  She has built things people love.  The whole geek goddess thing aside, you have to respect someone who made herself, she had a passion, a talent, and a drive and did something that ended up connecting with a lot of people.  That those people would then feel a special bond to her makes so much sense.  And good for them.  She’s here for me because I am hurriedly catching up on Supernatural after falling behind last year and she just showed up.  And well, I’m not invulnerable to cute.  So here she is, today I want to fuck Felicia Day.

So I just watched the latest Doctor Who and it broke my heart.  Again.  Cause that’s what this show does apparently.  I believe I have already discussed what a wonderful tool for teaching children that everyone goes away in the end the show is.  Well, that’s not fair but for a show that at it’s core is about hope and striving to be better it sure does love it’s painful goodbyes.  This entry is really a love letter to the character of Amy Pond and the work Karen Gillan did as her.  I am sure I will see Karen in other things and I am sure I will find her attractive but I cannot imagine falling in love with her performance in this way again.  I will miss Amy, I will miss my weekly dose of Karen.  Goodbyes are hard and sad but they can be beautiful if you use them to remember just why you care in the first place.  I think I’ll take that approach and remember just how charming and engaging and beautiful Karen Gillan can be on the screen.  Today I want to fuck Karen Gillan.