Tag: Emma Watson

Here’s Emma Watson because I’m such a radical non traditionalist, I love posting my way out there unpopular celebrities. You know, real out there types who have appeared in the most successful movie franchises of all time. I also love Brussels Sprouts guys. Love them. Like plan weeks of meals around what will go well with them. What I am saying is I am a unique and fascinating iconoclast, which is why I am posting Emma Watson. I don’t want a parade or anything, just recognition of how I forge my own path. Anyway, she looks good because she is actually very pretty. I have little to no opinion on Wizards and shit and that always frustrates people but it’s just how it goes. She seems fantastic though even without the movies, in part cause I have always liked how she uses her fame. Today I want to fuck Emma Watson.

Hey guys, here is some Emma Watson for you. I could make some jokes about Millennials loving Emma Watson and a reference to like, Avocado and killing industries but I won’t. Largely because I can’t be certain I haven’t made that joke before. It’s not original either way. Emma Watson was for some reason repeatedly placed in my path yesterday. It seemed like either the universe was telling me something or I was experiencing confirmation bias. As far as I am concerned a great cosmic purpose unfolded before me or  me experiencing a common cognitive bias seem equally as likely. So we’ll never know which it was. As a result, today I want to fuck Emma Watson.

I know I just posted Emma Watson the other day but wow… you guys really like Emma Watson. I mean, I am sure this is breaking news. The girl who plays (I assume, I have not seen the films) one the female protagonist who is both admirable and laudable in many ways in the defining series of movies for an entire generation is going to have some admirers. We had Princess Leia when I was a kid. So I get it. There are no doubt legions of girls who wanted to be her and legions of boys for whom she was their first crush. And no doubt a smaller legion of boys who wanted to be her and a smaller legion of girls for whom she was their first crush. That’s powerful stuff. I guess it makes her the Carrie Fisher for a younger generation. Just with (and again, as far as I know, I haven’t seen the films and I do not know her personally) far less cocaine and not nearly so foul a mouth. So my generation wins is what I am saying but she is pretty good, too. As far as I can tell (And I do read the news) she has done an admirable job of being someone to look up to when that’s a tough burden to ask someone to choose at 10 years old. So I get it. Millennials love Emma Watson like she was avocados and crushing school debt mixed together. She’s all your favorite stuff. But my last post got an astonishing number of people reaching out to just comment on Emma Watson. Most common questions were, “Have you posted her before?” and “Dude, have you seen thing X she’s so hot”. The answers are: Yes, today is the 10th time actually, and No, most likely not. Anyway, in my perpetual performance art project to show us that we live in a feedback loop where we can’t see past our own reflection, she is here today because she was so popular that I have been talking to people about her for days including last night and hey, here she is. It doesn’t hurt that whatever your feeling on like… fuck, I dunno, Muggles, that’s some bullshit you guys like to say that I don’t know what it means but it sure sounds like a slur to me, whatever your feeling on wizards and shit, she takes a very good picture. So it turns out it isn’t hard at all to talk myself into posting her once I go looking. Today I want to fuck Emma Watson.

Here is Emma Watson because the subconscious is a strange and magical place. Why is she on my mind? I can’t give you any concrete reason. I haven’t seen anything or read anything or heard anything. I don’t think. That last one is a bit more suspect because people are talking all the time when I walk by and maybe they are always talking about Emma Watson. This is possible. I don’t consciously eavesdrop or anything but the brain is always working. So maybe literally everywhere I live people are constantly all a flutter about Emma Watson and talking about her and it seeped in. It’s possible. Either way I had a dream about her last night. It seemed strange until I came up with my bulletproof people talking about her theory while I was writing this. Science fact at this point essentially. Mystery solved. Today I want to fuck Emma Watson.

So I am uncertain if I will end up seeing Beauty and the Beast.  I mean, it’s not really for me and I don’t really understand a live action remake of a cartoon because… I guess I like cartoons fine and unless you are adding nuance or strengthening things thematically for an older audience I am not sure why you do it.  And animated classics from Disney are not typically lacking in strong themes or visuals.  From what I see it follows the same story, which is about a girl who can read and thus is doomed to a life so loveless celibacy because the only eligible bachelor in town is a fuckboy named Gaston and Belle, being intelligent, knows that would end in murder suicide when she accidentally knocked something over in his super sweet mancave.  Luckily, thanks to a twist of fate, things take a turn and the movie becomes the most romantic movie about Stockholm syndrome ever as we get a working example of everything being ok if you just marry up while also a wonderful example of why the French Revolution had to happen.  The aristocracy is corrupt and neglectful and their mistakes harm everyone under them.  I am not a Marxist but I also have no desire to be a tea cup because some foppish 10 year old is a shallow prick. Anyway, we all know the story, and I am not sure I will see it but from the first stills I have been amazed with how perfect Emma Watson looks in the role. Obviously I post a lot of beautiful women here but I do feel a certain elegance and grace is required to pull off a woman named Beauty.  So from day one she has seemed to be excellent casting and she looked great and at the slew of premiers over the past few weeks she has just looked fantastic.  I love some of the gowns she’s worn.  So I am posting her.  Today I want to fuck Emma Watson.

Emma Watson is here because I kind of had a Harry Potter dream.  I say kind of because you can only have so accurate a dream about something your brain knows nothing about.  I know nothing about Harry Potter but in my dream everyone lived in a magic tower and they played pogs all the time and the person who won the most at pogs would become the king wizard.  Everyone spoke in what were obviously fake British accents as well.  I don’t remember a lot more than that except that since I don’t really know the character names they all went by their actor names.  By they I mean Emma Watson and Daniel Radcliff.  I think my brain totally made up the rest.  Good times.  Anyway, that had me thinking about Emma Watson this morning and she is pretty and so here she is.  I know you people love Emma Watson.  So today I want to fuck Emma Watson.

Here’s Emma Watson cause I know you kids love Emma Watson.  I have my finger on the pulse, I know what kids like.  Rap music, skate boards, and Emma Watson.  Except you’re not really kids anymore are you?  Like the kids who grew up on Harry Potter are all growed up and that makes me feel pretty old.  Emma Watson is talking to the UN about feminism now.  It is a strange, weird world.  That’s not why she’s here though, she’s here because I had a dream about the apocalypse and she was there and surprisingly effective against Zombies.  Who had any idea?  I didn’t.  Or I guess I did, it’s my subconscious.  Anyway, today I want to fuck Emma Watson.

Here is Emma Watson because I think I might have had a dream about Emma Watson.  I think so.  I can’t be sure but I woke up thinking about her and have some snippets of thoughts about her that are strange.  So maybe I did?  I have no idea.  All I know is I woke up thinking about her and she’s pretty so here she is.  Enjoy, I know you kids love your Emma Watson and your slap bracelets and your skateboards and rap music.  Today I want to fuck Emma Watson.

Here is Emma Watson who always surprises me when she shows up here.  I mean, I know she’s going to, I am the one typing these words, it isn’t like I black out and when I come to there is some mysterious Emma Watson post, it’s more that if you asked me Monday I never would have thought she’d show up this week.  I would have said it was unlikely.  This is because she’s not mine, there are people who like Emma Watson way more than I do.  I haven’t seen her movies, like at all.  I have seen her only in one or two things.  She actually seems remarkably charming, intelligent and mature, so I fully get why so many people just love her but I am not one of those people so it almost feels like stealing.  You just don’t claim a girl when you know someone else likes her more.  I am not saying this as a dibs thing, that would rob the woman of her agency, that all the matters is what people claiming her want, not her own desires but it’s like… with donuts.  Yes, i am going to compare women to donuts after trying not to demean women but let’s say your friend loves jelly donuts, they’re his favorite thing in the whole world.  Someone brings in a box of donuts.  There is one jelly.  Even if you’re kind of in the mood for a jelly donut you’d be a douche to take the only one when you know it would mean the world for someone else to have it.  It’s like that.  Could the jelly choose then yes, the jelly should choose who gets to eat it, but the jelly isn’t going to choose so you are a decent person and leave it for your friend.  It’s like that because honestly, Emma Watson isn’t choosing any of us.  Hate to break it to you, she’s not, so it always feels slightly wrong for me to post her.  Except it’s not my fault, she did these amazing pictures for Wonderland Magazine and they are just so good I couldn’t help it.  So I am posting her.  And if that makes me a douche that makes me a douche.  Today I want to fuck Emma Watson.

Look, I know you guys love Emma Watson.  I have never even questioned why, it made sense.  She’s pretty, she’s smart, she was in a series of movies that shaped your childhood.  That’s powerful stuff.  But I was never drawn to her.  I really didn’t think she’d ever show up on this blog.  Except now she’s making her third appearance.  As with last time I just woke up thinking about her.  I just keep doing so.  I’ve given it plenty of time, too.  But… she’s still there.  Man, I don’t get it.  And I am not sure what to say, so why don’t you tell me why she’s so great.  My as box is open.  You can reply to the post.  You can reblog and add your thoughts there.  Hell, you can even send me an anon here.  I am really interested to hear, maybe it will give me some insight.  I have no idea why she is suddenly so attractive to me, I just know that today I want to fuck Emma Watson.